ACT III. SCENE I-A Room in Baptista's House. Hor. But, wrangling pedant, this is Luc. Preposterous ass! that never read so far Hor. Sirrah, I will not bear these braves of thine. Bian. Why, gentlemen, you do me double wrong, To strive for that which resteth in my choice: I am no breeching scholar in the schools; I'll not be tied to hours, nor 'pointed times, But learn my lessons as I please myself. And to cut off all strife, here sit we down:Take you your instrument, play you the whiles; His lecture will be done, ere you have tun'd. Hor. You'll leave his lecture when I am in tune? [TO BIANCA. HORTENSIO retires. Luc. That will be never; tune your instrument. Bian. Where left we last? Luc. Here, madam: Hac ibat Simois; hic est Sigeia tellus: Hic steterat Priami regia celsa 'senis. Bian. Construe them. Luc. Hac ibat, as I told you before,-Simois, I am Lucentio,-hic est, son unto Vincentio of Pisa,-Sigeia tellus, disguised thus to get your love-Hic steterat, and that Lucentio that comes a wooings—Priami, is my man Tranio,-regia, bearing my port,-celsa senis, that we might beguile the old pantaloon." Hor. Madam, my instrument's in tune. Bian. Let's hear; O fye! the treble jars. [Returning. [HORTENSIO plays. Luc. Spit in the hole, man, and tune again. Bian. Now let me see if I can construe it: Hac ibat Simois, I know you not; hic est Sigeia tellus, I trust you not;-Hic steterat Priami, take heed he hear us not;-regia, presume not;-celsa senis, despair not. Hor. Madam, 'tis now in tune. All but the base. Hor. The base is right; 'tis the base knave that jars. How fiery and forward our pedant is! Good masters, take it not unkindly, pray, My lessons make no music in three parts. Luc. Are you so formal, sir? well, I must wait, And watch withal; for, but I be deceiv'd, Our fine musician groweth amorous. [Aside Hor. Madam, before you touch the instrument, To learn the order of my fingering, I must begin the rudiments of art; Bian. Why, I am past my gamut long ago. A re, to plead Hortensio's passion; Call you this-gamut? tut! I like it not: Enter a Servant. Serv. Mistress, your father prays you leave your books, [Exit. And help to dress your sister's chamber up; SCENE II. Before Baptista's House. Enter BAPTISTA, GREMIO, Tranio, Katharina, BIANCA, LUCENTIO, and Attendants. Brp. Signior Lucentio, [To TRANIO.] this is the 'pointed day That Katharine and Petruchio should be married, And yet we hear not of our son-in-law: What will be said? what mockery will it be, To want the bridegroom, when the priest attends To speak the ceremonial rites of marriage? What says Lucentio to this shame of ours? Kath. No shame but mine: I must, forsooth, be forced To give my hand, oppos'd against my heart, And, to be noted for a merry man, Tra. Patience, good Katharine, and Baptista, too; Kath. 'Would Katharine had never seen him [Exit, weeping, followed by BIANCA, and others. Bion. Master, master! news, old news, and such news as you never heard of! Bap. Is it new and old too? how may that be? Bion. Why, is it not news, to hear of Petruchio's coming? Bap. Is he come? Bion. Why, no, sir. Bup. What then? Bion. He is coming. Bap. When will he be here? Pet. Were it better I should rush in thus. And wherefore gaze this goodly company; Bap. Why, sir, you know this is your wedding-day: Tra. And tell us, what occasion of import Bion. When he stands where I am, and sees you Hath all so long detain'd you from your wife, there. Tra. But, say, what:-To thine old news. Bion. Why, Petruchio is coming, in a new hat and an old jerkin; a pair of old breeches, thrice turned, a pair of boots that have been candle-cases, one buckled, another laced; an old rusty sword ta'en out of the town armory, with a broken hilt and chapeless; with two broken points: His horse hipped with an old mothy saddle, the stirrups of no kindred: besides, possessed with the glanders, and like to mose in the chine; troubled with the lampass, infected with the fashions, full of wind-galls, sped with spavins, raied with the yellows, past cure of the fives, stark spoiled with the staggers, begnawn with the bots; swayed in the back, and shoulder-shotten; ne'er-legg'd before, and with a half-check'd bit, and a head-stall of sheep's leather; which, being restrained to keep him from stumbling, hath been often burst, and now repaired with knots: one girt six times pieced, and a woman's crupper of velure," which hath two letters for her name, fairly set down in studs, and here and there pieced with packthread. Bap. Who comes with him? Bion. O, sir, his lacquey, for all the world caparisoned like the horse; with a linen stock' on one leg, and a kersey boot-hose on the other, gartered with a red and blue list; an old hat, and The humor of forty fancies prick'd in't for a feather: a monster, a very monster in apparel; and not like a Christian foothoy, or a gentleman's lackey. Tra. "Tis some odd humor pricks him to this Yet oftentimes he goes but mean apparell'd. Bap. Didst thou not say, he comes? And sent you hither so unlike yourself? Pet. Tedious it were to tell, and harsh to hear: To me she's married, not unto my clothes: [Exit I am to get a man,-whate'er he be, • Matters. Doth watch Bianca's steps so narrowly, Tra. That by degrees we mean to look into, Signior Gremio, came you from the church? Gre. As willingly as e'er I came from school. Tra. And is the bride and bridegroom coming home! Gre. A bridegroom say you? 'tis a groom, indeed, A grumbling groom, and that the girl shall find. Tra. Curster than she? why, 'tis impossible. Gre. Why, he's a devil, a devil, a very fiend. Tra. Why, she's a devil, a devil, the devil's dam. Gre. Tut! she's a lamb, a dove, a fool to him. I'll tell you, sir Lucentio: When the priest Should ask-if Katharine should be his wife, Ay, by gogs-wouns, quoth he; and swore so loud, That, all amazed, the priest let fall the book: And, as he stoop'd again to take it up, The mad-brain'd bridegroom took him such a cuff, That down fell priest and book, and book and priest; Now take them up, quoth he, if any list. Tra. What said the wench, when he arose again? As if the vicar meant to cozen him. He calls for wine:-A health, quoth he; as if But that his beard grew thin and hungerly, I know, you think to dine with me to-day, Bap. Is't possible, you will away to-night? ⚫ Strange. It was the custom for the company present to drink wine immediately after the marriage ceremony. Do what thou canst, I will not go to-day; Pet. O, Kate, content thee; pr'ythee be not angry. Kath. I will be angry: What hast thou to do? Father, be quiet: he shall stay my leisure. Gre. Ay, marry, sir: now it begins to work. Kath. Gentlemen, forward to the bridal dinner:I see, a woman may be made a fool, If she had not a spirit to resist. Pet. They shall go forward, Kate, at thy comObey the bride, you that attend on her : [mand:Go to the feast, revel and domineer, Carouse full measure to her maidenhead, I'll buckler thee against a million. [Exeunt PETRUCHIO, KATHARINA, and GRUMIO. Bap. Nay, let them go, a couple of quict ones. Gre. Went they not quickly, I should die with laughing. Tra. Of all mad matches, never was the like! Luc. Mistress, what's your opinion of your sister? Bian. That being mad herself, she's madly mated. Gre. I wariant him, Petruchio is Kated. Bap. Neighbors and friends, though bride and bridegroom wants For to supply the places at the table, You know, there wants no junkets' at the feast;- Tra. Shall sweet Bianca practise how to bride it? • Delicacies. ACT IV. SCENE I.-- A Hall in Petruchio's Country House. Enter GRUMIO. Gru. Fye, fye, on all tired jades, on all mad masters, and all foul ways! Was ever man so beaten? was ever man so rayed?" was ever man so weary? I am sent before to make a fire, and they are coming after to warm them. Now, were I not a little pot, and soon hot, my very lips might freeze to my teeth, my tongue to the roof of my mouth, my heart in my belly, ere I should come by a fire to thaw me:-But, I, with blowing the fire, shall warm myself: for, considering the weather, a taller man than I will take cold. Holla, hoa! Curtis! Enter CURTIS. Curt. Who is that, calls so coldly? Gru. A piece of ice: If thou doubt it, thou mayst slide from my shoulder to my heel, with no greater a run but my head and my neck. A fire, good Curtis. Curt. Is my master and his wife coming, Grumio? Gru. O, ay, Curtis, ay: and therefore fire, fire; cast on no water. Curt. Is she so hot a shrew as she's reported? Gru. She was, good Curtis, before this frost; but, thou know'st, winter tames man, woman, and beast; for it hath tamed my old master, and my new mistress, and myself, fellow Curtis.. Curt. Away, you three-inch fool! I am no beast. Gru. Am I but three inches? why, thy horn is a foot; and so long am I, at the least. But wilt thou make a fire, or shall I complain on thee to our mistress, whose hand (she being now at hand) thou shalt soon feel, to thy cold comfort, for being slow in thy hot office? Curt. I pr'ythee, good Grumio, tell me, how goes the world? Gru. A cold world, Curtis, in every office but thine; and, therefore, fire: Do thy duty, and have thy duty; for mymaster and mistress are almost frozen to death. Curt. There's fire ready: And therefore, good Grumio, the news? Gru. Why, Jack boy! ho boy! and as much news as thou wilt. Curt. Come, you are so full of conycatching :Gru. Why, therefore, fire; for I have caught extreme cold. Where's the cook? is supper ready, the house trimmed, rushes strewed, cobwebs swept; the serving men in their new fustian, the white stockings, and every officer his wedding-garment on? Be the jacks fair within, the jills fair without, the carpets laid, and every thing in order? Curt. All ready; and therefore, I pray thee, news? Gru. First, know, my horse is tired; my master and mistress fallen out. came down a foul hill, my master riding behind my mistress: Curt. Both on one horse? Gru. Tell thou the tale:But hadst thou not crossed me, thou shouldst have heard how her horse fell, and she under her horse; thou shouldst have heard in how miry a place: how she was bemoiled;' how he left her with the horse upon her; how he beat me because her horse stumbled; how she waded through the dirt to pluck him off me; how he swore; how she prayed-that never prayed Before; how I cried; how the horses ran away; how her bridle was burst; how I lost my crupper;-with many things of worthy memory; which now shall die in oblivion, and thou return unexperienced to thy grave. Curt. By this reckoning, he is more shrew than she. Gru. Ay; and that, thou and the proudest of you all shall find, when he comes home. But what talk I of this?-call forth Nathaniel, Joseph, Nicholas, Philip, Walter, Sugarsop, and the rest; let their heads be sleekly combed, their blue coats brushed, and their garters of an indifferent knit: let them curtsey with their left legs; and not presume to touch a hair of my master's horse-tail, till they kiss their hands. Are they all ready? Curt. They are. Gru. Call them forth. Curt. Do you hear, ho! you must meet my master, to countenance my mistress. Gru. Why, she hath a face of her own. Gru. Thou, it seems; that callest for company to countenance her. Curt. I call them forth to credit her. Gru. Why, she comes to borrow nothing of them. Nath. Welcome home, Grumio. Gru. Welcome, you;-how now, you;-what, you;-fellow, you-and thus much for greeting. Now, my spruce companions, is all eady and all things neat? Nath. All things are ready: How near is our master? Gru. E'en at hand, alighted by this; and therefore be not-Cock's passion, silence! -I hear my master. Enter PETRUCHIO and KATHARINA. Pet. Where be these knaves? What, no man at To hold my stirrup, nor to take my horse! [door, Where is Nathaniel, Gregory, Philip ? All Serv. Here, here, sir; here, sir. Pet. Here, sir! here, sir! here, sir! here, sir!What, no attendance? no regard? no duty?— You logger-headed and unpolish'd grooms! Where is the foolish knave I sent before? Gru. Here, sir; as foolish as I was before. Pet. You peasant swain! you whoreson malt | And, for this night, we'll fast for company: horse drudge! Did I not bid thee meet me in the park, Gru. Nathaniel's coat, sir, was not fully made, And Gabriel's pumps were all unpink'd i' the heel; There was no link to color Peter's hat, And Walter's dagger was not come from sheathing: There were none fine, but Adam, Ralph, and Gregory; The rest were ragged, old, and beggarly; Re-enter Servants with Supper. Come, I will bring thee to thy bridal chamber. Nath. [Advancing.] Peter, didst ever see the like? Gru. Where is he? Curt. In her chamber, Making a sermon of continency to her: Pet. Thus have I politicly begun my reign, Why, when, I say?-Nay, good sweet Kate, be My falcon now is sharp, and passing empty; merry. Off with my boots, you rogues, you villains When? [Sings. It was the friar of orders gray, As he forth walked on his way:Out, out, you rogue! you pluck my foot awry: Take that, and mend the plucking off the other. [Strikes him. Be merry, Kate:-Some water, here; what, ho! Where's my spaniel Troilus?-Sirrah, get you hence, And bid my cousin Ferdinand come hither:[Exit Servant. One, Kate, that you must kiss, and be acquainted with. Where are my slippers?-shall I have some water? [A basin is presented to him. Come, Kate, and wash, and welcome heartily: [Servant lets the ewer fall. You whoreson villain! will you let it fall? [Strikes him. Kath. Patience, I pray you; 'twas a fault unwilling. Pet. A whoreson beetle-headed, flap-ear'd knave! Come, Kate; sit down; I know you have a stomach. Will you give thanks, sweet Kate; or else shall I?— What is this? mutton? 1 Serv. 1 Serv. Ay. Who brought it? I. Pet. "Tis burnt; and so is all the meat; What dogs are these?-Where is the rascal cook? How durst you, villains, bring it from the dresser, And serve it thus to me that love it not? There, take it to you, trenchers, cups and all: [Throws the meat, &c. about the stage. You heedless joltheads, and unmanner'd slaves! What, do you grumble? I'll be with you straight. Kath. I pray you, husband, be not so disquiet; The meat was well, if you were so contented. Pet. I tell thee, Kate, 'twas burnt and dried away; And I expressly am forbid to touch it, For it engenders choler, planteth anger; And till she stoop, she must not be full-gorged, And here I'll fling the pillow, there the bolster, mor: [Exit. He that knows better how to tame a shrew, Enter TRANIO and HORTENSIO. I tell you, sir, she bears me fair in hand. Enter BIANCA and LUCENTIO. |