love-prate: we must have your doublet and hose | And turn'd into the extremity of love. I saw her hand: she has a leathern hand, plucked over your head. A freestone-colour'd hand; I verily did think That her old gloves were on, but 'twas her hands, She has a huswife's hand: but that's no matter : she never did invent this letter; This is a man's invention, and his hand. Sil. Sure, it is hers. Ros. O coz, coz, coz, my pretty little coz, that thou did'st know how many fathom deep I am in love! But it cannot be sounded; my affection hath an unknown bottom, like the bay of Portugal. Cel. Or rather, bottomless; that as fast as you pour affection in, it runs out. Ros. No, that same wicked boy of Venus, that was begot of thought, conceived of spleen, and born of madness; that blind rascally boy, that abuses every one's eyes, because his own are out, let him be judge, how deep I am in love: - I'll tell thee, Aliena, I cannot be out of the sight of Orlando: I'll go find a shadow, and sigh till he come. Cel. And I'll sleep. [Exeunt. Another Part of the Forest. Enter JAQUES and Lords, in the habit of Foresters. Jaq. Let's present him to the duke, like a Roman conqueror; and it would do well to set the deer's horns upon his head, for a branch of victory : — Have you no song, forester, for this purpose? 2 Lord. Yes, sir. I say, Ros. Why, 'tis a boisterous and cruel style, - Will you hear the Sil. So please you, for I never heard it yet; Ros. She Phebes me: Mark how the tyrant Jaq. Sing it; 'tis no matter how it be in tune, Did you ever hear such railing? so it make noise enough. Ros. How say you now? Is it not past two o'clock ? and here much Orlando! Cel. I warrant you, with pure love, and troubled brain, he hath ta'en his bow and arrows, and is gone forth to sleep: Look, who comes here. Enter SILVIUS. Sil. My errand is to you, fair youth; — My gentle Phebe bid me give you this; Whiles the eye of man did woo me, Meaning me a beast. If the scorn of your bright eyne Have power to raise such love in mine, And then I'll study how to die. Sil. Call you this chiding? Cel. Alas, poor shepherd! Ros. Do you pity him? no, he deserves no pity. Wilt thou love such a woman? What, to make thee an instrument, and play false strains upon thee not to be endured!- Well, go your way to [Giving a letter. her, (for I see, love hath made thee a tame snake,) I know not the contents; but, as I guess, Ros. Patience herself would startle at this letter, Cel. Are you his brother? Ros. But at this hour the house doth keep itself, Oli. If that an eye may profit by a tongue, Are not you Oli. When last the young Orlando parted from you, He left a promise to return again Within an hour; and, pacing through the forest, Was it you he rescu'd? Cel. Was't you that did so oft contrive to kill him? By, and by. Oli. 'Twas I; but 'tis not I; I do not shame To tell this story, that you might excuse Under an oak, whose boughs were moss'd with age Dy'd in his blood, unto the shepherd youth And high top bald with dry antiquity, A wretched ragged man, o'ergrown with hair, Lay couching, head on ground, with cat-like watch, To prey on nothing that doth seem as dead: And he did render 5 him the most unnatural Oli. That he in sport doth call his Rosalind. mede? Cel. Why how now, Ganymede? sweet Gany- I would, I were at home. Cel. We'll lead you thither : I pray you, will you take him by the arm? Ros. I do so, I confess it. Ah, sir, a body would think this was well counterfeited: I pray you, tell your brother how well I counterfeited. — Heigh ho! Oli. This was not counterfeit; there is too great testimony in your complexion, that it was a passion of earnest. Ros. Counterfeit, I assure you. Oli. Well then, take a good heart, and counter And well he might so do, feit to be a man. For well I know he was unnatural. Oli. Twice did he turn his back, and purpos'd so: Who quickly fell before him; in which hurtling From miserable slumber I awak'd. 6 Ros. So I do: but, i'faith I should have been a woman by right. Cel. Come, you look paler and paler; pray you, draw homewards : Good sir, go with us. Oli. That will I, for I must bear answer back How you excuse my brother, Rosalind. Ros. I shall devise something: But, I pray you, commend my counterfeiting to him: - Will you go? [Exeunt. Touch. A most wicked sir Oliver, Audrey, a most vile Mar-text. But, Audrey, there is a youth here in the forest lays claim to you. Aud. Ay, I know who 'tis; he hath no interest in me in the world: here comes the man you mean. Enter WILLIAM. Touch. It is meat and drink to me to see a clown: By my troth, we that have good wits, have much to Will. And good even to you, sir. Will. Five and twenty, sir. Touch. A ripe age: Is thy name William? Touch. A fair name; Wast born i' the forest here? Touch. Art rich? Will. 'Faith, sir, so so. --- Touch. He, sir, that must marry this woman : Therefore, you clown, abandon, which is in the vulgar, leave, the society, which in the boorish is company, - of this female, which in the common is, -woman, which together is, abandon the society of this female; or, clown, thou perishest; or, to thy better understanding, diest; to wit, I kill thee, make thee away, translate thy life into death, thy liberty into bondage: I will deal in poison with thee, or in bastinado, or in steel; I will bandy with thee in faction; I will o'er-run thee with policy; I will kill thee a hundred and fifty ways; therefore tremble, and depart. Aud. Do, good William. Enter CORIN. [Exit. Enter ORLANDO and OLIVER. Orl. Is't possible, that on so little acquaintance you should like her? that, but seeing, you should love her? and, loving, woo? and, wooing, she should grant? and will you perséver to marry her? Oli. Neither call the giddiness of it in question, the poverty of her, the small acquaintance, my sudden wooing, nor her sudden consenting; but say with me, I love Aliena; say with her, that she loves me; consent with both, that we may enjoy each other: it shall be to your good; for my father's house, and all the revenue that was old sir Row land's, will I estate upon you, and here live and die a shepherd. Enter ROSALIND. Orl. You have my consent. Let your wedding all his contented followers: Go you, and prepare be to-morrow; thither will I invite the duke, and Aliena; for, look you, here comes my Rosalind. Ros. God save you, brother. Ros. O, my dear Orlando, how it grieves me to see thee wear thy heart in a scarf. Orl. It is my arm. Ros. I thought, thy heart had been wounded with the claws of a lion. Orl. Wounded it is, but with the eyes of a lady. Ros. Did your brother tell you how I counterfeited to swoon, when he showed me your handkerchief? Orl. Ay, and greater wonders than that. there was never any thing so sudden, but the fight Ros. O, I know where you are: - - Nay, 'tis true: of two rams, and Cæsar's thrasonical brag of - I sister no sooner met, but they looked; no sooner came, saw, and overcame: For your brother and my looked, but they loved; no sooner loved, but they sighed; no sooner sighed, but they asked one another the reason; no sooner knew the reason, but they sought the remedy: and in these degrees have they made a pair of stairs to marriage: they are in the very wrath of love, and they will together; clubs cannot part them. Orl. They shall be married to-morrow; and I will bid the duke to the nuptial. But, O, how bitter a thing it is to look into happiness through another man's eyes! By so much the more shall I to-morrow be at the height of heart-heaviness, by how much I shall think my brother happy, in having what he wishes for. Ros. Why then, to-morrow I cannot serve your turn for Rosalind? Orl. I can live no longer by thinking. Ros. I will weary you no longer then with idle talking. Know of me then, (for now I speak to some purpose,) that I know you are a gentleman of good conceit: I speak not this, that you should bear good opinion of my knowledge, insomuch, I say, I know you are; neither do I labour for a greater esteem than may in some little measure draw a belief from you, to do yourself good, and not to grace me. Believe then, if you please, that I can do strange things: have, since I was three years old, conversed with a magician, most profound in this art. If you do love Rosalind so near the heart as your gesture cries it out, when your brother marries Aliena, shall you marry her: I know into what straits of fortune she is driven; and it is not impossible to me, if it appear not inconvenient to you, to set her before your eyes to-morrow, human as she is, and without any danger. Orl. Speakest thou in sober meanings? Ros. By my life, I do; which I tender dearly, though I say I am a magician: Therefore, put you in your best array, bid your friends; for if you will be married to-morrow, you shall; and to Rosalind, if you will. Enter SILVIUS and PHEBE. Look, here comes a lover of mine, and a lover of hers. Phe. Youth, you have done me much ungentleness, To show the letter that I writ to you. Ros. I care not, if I have: it is my study, Ros. And I for no woman. Sil. It is to be all made of fantasy, All made of passion, and all made of wishes; Phe. And so am I for Ganymede. Orl. To her, that is not here, nor doth not hear. Ros. Pray you, no more of this; 'tis like the howling of Irish wolves against the moon. I will help you, [To SILVIUS.] if I can: - I would love | you, To PHEBE.] if I could. -To-morrow meet me all together. - I will marry you, [To PHEBE.] if ever I marry woman, and I'll be married to-morrow: - I will satisfy you, [To ORLANDO.] if ever I satisfied man, and you shall be married to-morrow : I will content you, [To SILVIUS.] if what pleases you contents you, and you shall be married to morrow. ―― Duke S. Dost thou believe, Orlando, that the boy Can do all this that he hath promised? Orl. I sometimes do believe, and sometimes do not; As those that fear they hope, and know they fear. Enter ROSALIND, SILVIUS, and PHEBE. Ros. Patience once more, whiles our compact is urg'd: :----→ As you [To ORLANDO.] love Rosalind, You say, if I bring in your Rosalind, meet; -as you [To SILVIUS.] love Phebe, meet; and as I love no woman, I'll meet. - So, fare you well; I have left you commands. Sil. I'll not fail, if I live. 1 Page. Well met, honest gentleman. [To the Duke. You will bestow her on Orlando here? Duke S. That would I, had I kingdoms to give with her. Ros. And you say, you will have her when I bring her? [TO ORLANDO. Orl. That would I, were I of all kingdoms king. Ros. You say, you'll marry me, if I be willing? [To PHEBE. Phe. That will I, should I die the hour after. Ros. You say, that you'll have Phebe, if she will? Sil. Though to have her and death were both one thing. Ros. I have promis'd to make all this matter even. Touch. By my troth, well met: Come, sit, sit, and Keep you your word, O duke, to give your a song. 2 Page. And both in a tune, like two gipsies on a horse. 7 A married woman. Duke S. I do remember in this shepherd-boy Orl. My lord, the first time that I ever saw him, Enter TOUCHSTONE and Audrey. Jaq. There is, sure, another flood toward, and these couples are coming to the ark! Here comes a pair of very strange beasts, which in all tongues are called fools. Touch. Salutation and greeting to you all! Jaq. Good my lord, bid him welcome: This is the motley-minded gentleman, that I have so often met in the forest: he hath been a courtier, he swears. Touch. If any man doubt that, let him put me to my purgation. I have trod a measure 8; I have flattered a lady; I have been politick with my friend, smooth with mine enemy; I have undone three tailors; I have had four quarrels, and like to have fought one. Jaq. And how was that ta'en up? Touch. 'Faith, we met, and found the quarrel was upon the seventh cause. Jaq. How seventh cause? – Good my lord, like this fellow. Duke S. I like him very well. Touch. Sir; I desire you of the like. I press in here, sir, amongst the rest of the country folks, to swear, and to forswear; according as marriage binds, and blood breaks : A poor virgin, sir, an illfavoured thing, sir, but mine own; a poor humour of mine, sir, to take that that no man else will: Rich honesty dwells like a miser, sir, in a poor- | house ; as your pearl, in your foul oyster. Duke S. By my faith, he is very swift and sententious. the second, the Quip modest; the third, the Reply churlish; the fourth, the Reproof valiant; the fifth, | the Countercheck quarrelsome; the sixth, the Lie with circumstance; the seventh, the Lie direct. All these you may avoid but the lie direct; and you may avoid that too, with an If. I knew when seven justices could not take up a quarrel: but when the parties were met themselves, one of them thought but of an If, as If you said so, then I said so; and they shook hands, and swore brothers. Your If is the only peace-maker; much virtue in If. Jaq. Is not this a rare fellow, my lord? he's as good at any thing, and yet a fool. Duke S. He uses his folly like a stalking-horse, and under the presentation of that he shoots his wit. Enter HYMEN, leading ROSALIND in woman's clothes; and CELIA. [TO ORLANDO. Touch. According to the fool's bolt, sir. Jag. But, for the seventh cause; how did you | Nor ne'er wed woman, if you be not she. find the quarrel on the seventh cause? Touch. Upon a lie seven times removed; - Bear your body more seeming, Audrey : : . as thus, sir. I did dislike the cut of a certain courtier's beard; he sent me word, if I said his beard was not cut well, he was in the mind it was: This is called the Retort courteous. If I sent him word again, it was not well cut, he would send me word, he cut it to please himself: This is called the Quip modest. If again, it was not well cut, he disabled my judgment: This is call'd the Reply churlish. If again, it was not well cut, he would answer, I spake not true : This is call'd the Reproof valiant. If again, it was not well cut, he would say, I lie: This is called the Countercheck quarrelsome: and so to the Lie circumstantial, and the Lie direct. Jaq. And how oft did you say, his beard was not well cut? Touch. I durst go no further than the Lie circumstantial, nor he durst not give me the Lie direct; and so we measured swords and parted. Jaq. Can you nominate in order now the degrees of the lie? Touch. O sir, we quarrel in print, by the book ; as you have books for good manners: I will name you the degrees. The first, the Retort courteous; A stately solemn dance. [To PHERE. Hym. Peace, ho! I bar confusion: If truth holds true contents. 9 [To ORLANDO and ROSALIND. You and you are heart in heart: [To OLIVER and CELIA. [To ToUCHSTONE and AUDREY. SONG. Wedding is great Juno's crown ; O blessed bond of board and bed! 'Tis Hymen peoples every town ; High wedlock then be honoured: 9 Unless truth fail of veracity. |