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Ther. Agamemnon is a fool to offer to command
Achilles; Achilles is a fool to be commanded of
Agamemnon; Thersites is a fool to serve such a
fool; and Patroclus is a fool positive.
Patr. Why am I a fool?

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Ther. Make that demand of the prover. - It suf-
Look you, who comes here?

Enter AGAMEMNON, ULYSSES, NESTOR, DIOMEDes,

and AJAX.

Achil. Patroclus, I'll speak with nobody: — Come in with me, Thersites. [Exit. Ther. Here is such patchery, such juggling, and such knavery! [Exit.

Ther. How, now, Thersites? what, lost in the labyrinth of thy fury? Shall the elephant Ajax carry it thus? he beats me, and I rail at him: Ofices me, thou art. worthy satisfaction! 'would, it were otherwise; that I could beat him, whilst he railed at me: I'll learn to conjure and raise devils, but I'll see some issue of my spiteful execrations. Then there's Achilles, - a rare engineer. If Troy be not taken, till these two undermine it, the walls will stand till they fall of themselves. O thou great thunder-darter of Olympus, forget that thou art Jove the king of gods; and, Mercury, lose all the serpentine craft of thy Caduceus; if ye take not that little little less-than-little wit from them that they have! which short-armed ignorance itself knows is so abundant scarce, it will not in circumvention deliver a fly from a spider, without drawing their massy irons, and cutting the web. After this, the vengeance on the whole camp! What, ho! my lord Achilles !

Enter PATROCLUS.

Patr. Who's there? Thersites? Good Thersites, come in and rail.

Ther. If I could have remembered a gilt counterfeit, thou wouldest not have slipped out of my contemplation: but it is no matter; Thyself upon thyself! The common curse of mankind, folly and ignorance, be thine in great revenue! heaven bless thee from a tutor, and discipline come not near thee! Let thy blood be thy direction till thy death! then if she, that lays thee out, says thou art a fair corse, I'll be sworn and sworn upon't, she never shrouded any but lazars. 5 Amen. Where's Achilles?

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Patr. What, art thou devout? wast thou in prayer?

Ther. Ay; The heavens hear me !

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Achil. Where, where?- Art thou come? Why, my cheese, my digestion, why hast thou not served thyself in to my table so many meals? Come; what's Agamemnon?

Ther. Thy commander, Achilles ; Then tell me, Patroclus, what's Achilles?

Patr. Thy lord, Thersites; Then tell me, I pray thee, what's thyself?

Ther. Thy knower, Patroclus; Then tell me,
Patroclus, what art thou?

Patr. Thou mayst tell, that knowest.
Achil. O, tell, tell.

Ther. I'll decline the whole question. Agamem-
non commands Achilles; Achilles is my lord; I am
Patroclus' knower; and Patroclus is a fool
Patr. You rascal!

Ther. Peace, fool; I have not done.
Achil. He is a privileged man. - Proceed, Ther-

sites.
Ther. Agamemnon is a fool; Achilles is a fool;
Thersites is a fool; and, as aforesaid, Patroclus is
a fool.

Achil. Derive this; come.

The wand of Mercury, which is wreathed with serpents.
Leprous persons.

Agam. Where is Achilles?

Patr. Within his tent; but ill-dispos'd, my lord.
He shent 6 our messengers; and we lay by
Agam. Let it be known to him, that we are here.
Our appertainments 7 visiting of him :
Let him be told so; lest, perchance, he think
We dare not move the question of our place,
Or know not what we are.

Patr.
I shall say so to him. [Exit.
Ulyss. We saw him at the opening of his tent;
He is not sick.

1

Ajax. Yes, lion-sick, sick of proud heart: you may call it melancholy, if you will favour the man ; but, by my head, 'tis pride: But why, why? let him show us a cause. A word, my lord. [Takes AGAMEMNON aside. Nest. What moves Ajax thus to bay at him? Ulyss. Achilles hath inveigled his fool from him. Nest. Who? Thersites? Ulyss. He.

Nest. Then will Ajax lack matter, if he have lost his argument.8

Ulyss. No; you see, he is his argument, that has his argument; Achilles.

Nest. All the better; their fraction is more our wish, than their faction: But it was a strong composure, a fool could disunite.

Ulyss. The amity that wisdom knits not, folly may easily untie. Here comes Patroclus.

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Hear you, Patroclus; We are too well acquainted with these answers: But his evasion, wing'd thus swift with scorn, Cannot outfly our apprehensions.

Much attribute he hath; and much the reason
Why we ascribe it to him: yet all his virtues, —
Not virtuously on his own part beheld, -
Do, in our eyes, begin to lose their gloss;
Yea, like fair fruit in an unwholesome dish,
Are like to rot untasted. Go and tell him,
We come to speak with him: And you shall not sin,
If you do say -we think him over-proud,
And under-honest; in self-assumption greater,
6 Rebuked, rated.
7 Appendage of rank or dignity.
8 Subject.
9 Exercise.

Than in the note of judgment; and worthier than | When they go from Achilles: Shall the proud lord,

himself

Here tend the savage strangeness he puts on;
Disguise the holy strength of their command,
And underwrite in an observing kind
His humorous predominance; yea, watch
His pettish lunes 3, his ebbs, his flows, as if
The passage and whole carriage of this action
Rode on his tide. Go, tell him this; and add,
That, if he overhold his price so much,
We'll none of him; but let him like an engine
Not portable, lie under this report ·
Bring action hither, this cannot go to war:
A stirring dwarf we do allowance give
Before a sleeping giant:
:- - Tell him so.
Patr. I shall; and bring his answer presently.

4

[Exit.

Agam. In second voice we'll not be satisfied, Ulysses, enter.

We come to speak with him.

[Exit ULYSSES.

Ajar. What is he more than another? Agam. No more than what he thinks he is. Ajar. Is he so much? Do you not think, he thinks himself a better man than I am?

Agam. No question.

Ajar. Will you subscribe his thought, and say— he is?

Agam. No, noble Ajax; you are as strong, as valiant, as wise, no less noble, much more gentle, and altogether more tractable.

Ajar. Why should a man be proud? How doth, pride grow? I know not what pride is.

Agam. Your mind's the clearer, Ajax, and your virtues the fairer. He that is proud, eats up himself: pride is his own glass, his own trumpet, his own chronicle; and whatever praises itself but in the deed, devours the deed in the praise.

Ajar. I do hate a proud man, as I hate the engendering of toads.

Nest. And yet he loves himself: Is it not strange? [Aside.

Re-enter ULYSSES. Ulyss. Achilles will not to the field to-morrow. Agam. What's his excuse? Ulyss

He doth rely on none; But carries on the stream of his dispose, Without observance or respect of any, In will peculiar and in self-admission.

Agam. Why will he not, upon our fair request, Untent his person, and share the air with us?

Ulyss. Things small as nothing, for request's sake only,

He makes important: Possess'd he is with greatness;
And speaks not to himself, but with a pride
That quarrels at self-breath: imagin'd worth
Holds in his blood such swoln and hot discourse,
That, 'twixt his mental and his active parts,
Kingdom'd Achilles in commotion rages,
And batters down himself: What should I say?
He is so plaguy proud, that the death-tokens of it
Cry No recovery.

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Agam.

Let Ajax go to him.—

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That bastes his arrogance with his own seams;
And never suffers matter of the world
Enter his thoughts, save such as do revolve
And ruminate himself, shall he be worshipp'd
Of that we hold an idol more than he?
No, this thrice worthy and right valiant lord
Must not so stale his palm, nobly acquir'd;
Nor, by my will, assubjugate his merit,
As amply titled as Achilles is,

By going to Achilles :

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[Aside.

Ajax. He should not bear it so,

He should eat swords first: Shall pride carry it?
Nest. An 'twould, you'd carry half. [Aside.
Ulyss.
He'd have ten shares.
[Aside
Ajax. I'll knead him, I will make him supple;
Nest. He's not yet thorough warm: forces him
with praises:

Pour in, pour in; his ambition is dry. [Aside
Ulyss. My lord, you feed too much on this dislike.
[To AGAMEMNON
Nest. O noble general, do not do so.
Dio. You must prepare to fight without Achilles
Ulyss. Why, 'tis this naming of him does him harm.
Here is a man- But 'tis before his face;
I will be silent.

Nest.

Wherefore should you so?

He is not emulous 9, as Achilles is.

Ulyss. Know the whole world, he is as valiant. Ajax. A vile dog, that shall palter thus with us! I would, he were a Trojan!

Nest.

Were it in Ajax now—

Ulyss.

What a vice

If he were proud!

Dio. Or covetous of praise? Ulyss.

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Dio. Or strange, or self-affected?

Ulyss. Thank the heavens, lord, thou art of sweet
composure;

Praise him that got thee, she that gave thee suck :
Fam'd be thy tutor, and thy parts of nature
Thrice-fam'd, beyond all erudition:
But he that disciplin'd thy arms to fight,
Let Mars divide eternity in twain,
And give him half: and, for thy vigour,
Bull-bearing Milo his addition yield

To sinewy Ajax. I will not praise thy wisdom,
Which, like a bourn3, a pale, a shore, confines
Thy spacious and dilated parts: Here's Nestor, -
Instructed by the antiquary times,

He must, he is, he cannot but be wise; But pardon, father Nestor, were your days

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ACT III.

SCENE I.-Troy. A Room in Priam's Palace. | guide them; especially to you, fair queen! fair

Enter PANDARUS and a Servant.

Pan. Friend! you! pray you, a word: Do not

you follow the young lord Paris?

Serv. Ay, sir, when he goes before me.
Pan. You do depend upon him, I mean?
Serv. Sir, I do depend upon that lord.

Pan. You do depend upon a noble gentleman; You know me, do you not?

Serv. 'Faith, sir, superficially.

Pan. Friend, know me better; I am the lord Pandarus.

Serv. I hope, I shall know your honour better. [Musick within. Pan. Honour and lordship are my titles: What musick is this?

Serv. I do but partly know, sir; it is musick in parts.

Pan. Know you the musicians?

Serv. Wholly, sir.

Pen. Who play they to?

Serv. To the hearers, sir.

Pan. At whose pleasure, friend?

Serv. At mine, sir, and theirs that love musick.
Pan. Command, I mean, friend.
Serv. Who shall I command, sir?

Pan. Friend, we understand not one another; I am too courtly, and thou art too cunning: At whose request do these men play?

Serv. That's to't, indeed, sir: Marry, sir, at the request of Paris my lord, who is there in person; with him the mortal Venus, the heart-blood of beauty, love's invisible soul,

Pan. Who, my cousin Cressida?

Serv. No, sir, Helen; Could you not find out that by her attributes?

Pan. It should seem, fellow, that thou hast not seen the lady Cressida. I come to speak with Paris from the prince Troilus: I will make a complimental assault upon himn, for my business seeths. 4 Serv. Sodden business! there's a stewed phrase, indeed!

Enter PARIS and HELEN, attended. Pan. Fair be to you, my lord, and to all this fair company! fair desires, in all fair measure, fairly

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thoughts be your fair pillow!

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Pan. I have business to my lord, dear queen :My lord, will you vouchsafe me a word?

Helen. Nay, this shall not hedge us out: we'll hear you sing certainly.

Pan. Well, sweet queen, you are pleasant with me.- - But (marry) thus, my lord, My dear lord, and most esteemed friend, your brother Troilus,

Helen. My lord Pandarus; honey sweet lord, Pan. Go to, sweet queen, go to: - - commends himself most affectionately to you.

Helen. You shall not bob us out of our melody; If you do, our melancholy upon your head!

Pan. Sweet queen, sweet queen; that's a sweet queen, i'faith.

Helen. And to make a sweet lady sad, is a sour offence.

Pan. Nay, that shall not serve your turn; that shall it not, in truth, la. Nay, I care not for such words; no, no. — And, my lord, he desires you, that, if the king call for him at supper, you will make his excuse.

Helen. My lord Pandarus,

Pan. What says my sweet queen,-my very very sweet queen?

Par. What exploit's in hand? where sups he to

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Pan. He! no, she'll none of him. Come, come, I'll hear no more of this; I'll sing you a song now. Helen. Ay, ay, pr'ythee now. By my troth, sweet lord, thou hast a fine forehead.

Pan. Ay, you may, you may.

Serv. No, sir; he stays for you to conduct him thither.

Enter TROILUS.

How now, how now? [Erit Servant.

Pan. O, here he comes. Tro. Sirrah, walk off. Pan. Have you seen my cousin? Tro. No, Pandarus: I stalk about her door, Like a strange soul upon the Stygian banks Staying for waftage. O, be thou my Charon, And give me swift transportance. Pandarus,

Helen. Let thy song be love: this love will undo From Cupid's shoulder pluck his painted wings, us all. O, Cupid, Cupid, Cupid!

Pan. Love! ay, that it shall, i'faith.

Par. Ay, good now, love, love, nothing but love. Pan. In good troth, it begins so :

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And fly with me to Cressid!

Pan. Walk here i'the orchard, I'll bring her straight. [Exit PANDARUS. Tro. I am giddy; expectation whirls me round. The imaginary relish is so sweet

That it enchants my sense; and I do fear
That I shall lose distinction in my joys;

As doth a battle, when they charge on heaps
The enemy flying.

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Pan. Come, come, what need you blush? shame's a baby. Here she is now: swear the oaths now to her, that you have sworn to me. What, are you gone again? you must be watched ere you be made tame, must you? Come your ways, come your ways; an you draw backward, we'll put you i' the fills. 7- Why do you not speak to her?

Tro. You have bereft me of all words, lady. Pan. Words pay no debts. Come in, come in; I'll [Exit PANDARUS., Cres. Will you walk in, my lord? Tro. O Cressida, how often have I wished me

go get a fire.

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Tro. Nothing, but our undertakings: when we vow to weep seas, live in fire, eat rocks, tame tigers : thinking it harder for our mistress to devise imposition enough, than for us to undergo any difficulty imposed. This is the monstruosity in love, lady. Cres. They that have the voice of lions, and the act of hares, are they not monsters?

Tro. Are there such? such are not we: Praise us as we are tasted, allow us as we prove; our head shall go bare, till merit crown it: no perfection in reversion shall have a praise in present: we will not name desert, before his birth; and, being born, his addition shall be humble. Few words to fair faith: Troilus shall be such to Cressid, as what envy can say worst, shall be a mock for his truth; and what truth can speak truest, not truer than Troilus? Cres. Will you walk in, my lord?

Re-enter PANDARUS.

Pan. What, blushing still?

Cres. Well, uncle, what folly I commit, I dedicate to you.

Pan. I thank you for that; be true to my lord: if he flinch, chide me for it.

Tro. You know now your hostages; your uncle's word, and my firm faith.

Pan. Nay, I'll give my word for her too; our kindred, though they be long ere they are wooed, they are constant, being won: they are burs, I can tell you; they'll stick where they are thrown.

Cres. Boldness comes to me now, and brings me heart:

Prince Troilus, I have lov'd you night and day
For many weary months.

Tro. Why was my Cressid then so hard to win?
Cres. Hard to seem won; but I was won, my lord,
With the first glance that ever-
Pardon me;
If I confess much, you will play the tyrant.
I love you now; but not, till now, so much
But I might master it :—in faith, I lie;

My thoughts were like unbridled children, grown
Too headstrong for their mother: See, we fools!
Why have I blabb'd? who shall be true to us,
When we are so unsecret to ourselves?
But, though I lov'd you well, I woo'd you not;
And yet, good faith, I wish'd myself a man ;
Or that we women had men's privilege
Of speaking first. Sweet, bid me hold my tongue;
For, in this rapture, I shall surely speak
The thing I shall repent. See, see your silence,
Cunning in dumbness, from my weakness draws
My very soul of counsel: Stop my mouth.

Tro. And shall, albeit sweet music issues thence.
Pan. Pretty, i' faith.

Cres. My lord, I do beseech you, pardon me;
'Twas not my purpose, thus to beg a kiss :
I am ashamed; - O heavens! what have I done?.
For this time will I take my leave, my lord,
Tro. Your leave, sweet Cressid?
Cres. Pray you, content you.
Tro.
What offends you, lady?
Cres. Sir, mine own company.

Tro.

Yourself.

Cres. Let me go and try:

Tro. Well know they what they speak, that speak so wisely.

Cres. Perchance, my lord, I show more craft than
love;

And fell so roundly to a large confession,
To angle for your thoughts: But you are wise;
Or else you love not; for to be wise and love,
Exceeds man's might; that dwells with gods above.
Tro. O, that I thought it could be in a woman,
(As, if it can, I will presume in you,)
To feed for aye9 her lamp and flames of love;
To keep her constancy in plight and youth,
Outliving beauty's outward, with a mind
That doth renew swifter than blood decays;
Or, that persuasion could but thus convince me, —
That my integrity and truth to you
Might be affronted with the match and weight
Of such a winnow'd purity in love;
How were I then uplifted! but, alas,
I am as true as truth's simplicity,
And simpler than the infancy of truth.
Cres. In that I'll war with you.
Tro.
When right with right wars who shall be most right!
True swains in love shall, in the world to come,
Approve their truths by Troilus: when their rhymes,
Full of protest, of oath, and big compare?,
Want similes, truth tir'd with iteration,
As true as steel, as plantage to the moon,
As sun to day, as turtle to her mate,
As iron to adamant, as earth to the center, -
Yet, after all comparisons of truth,
As truth's authentick author to be cited,
As true as Troilus shall crown up 3 the verse,
And sanctify the numbers.

Cres.

O virtuous fight,

Prophet may you be!

If I be false, or swerve a hair from truth,
When time is old and hath forgot itself,
When waterdrops have worn the stones of Troy,
And blind oblivion swallow'd cities up,
And mighty states characterless are grated
To dusty nothing; yet let memory,

From false to false, among false maids in love, Upbraid my falsehood! when they have said - as false

As air, as water, wind, or sandy earth,
As fox to lamb, as wolf to heifer's calf,
Pard to the hind, or stepdame to her son;
Yea, let them say, to stick the heart of falsehood,
As false as Cressid.

Pan. Go to, a bargain made: seal it, seal it; I'll be the witness. Here I hold your hand; here, my cousin's. If ever you prove false one to another, since I have taken such pains to bring you together, let all pitiful goers-between be called to the world's end after my name, call them all Pandars; let all inconstant men be Troiluses, all false women Cressids, and all brokers-between Pandars! say, amen.

Tro. Amen. Cres. Amen. Pan. Amen.

You cannot shun

I have a kind of self resides with you;
But an unkind self, that itself will leave,
To be another's fool. I would be gone:
Where is my wit? I know not what I speak.

8 Titles.

[Exeunt.

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