From simple sources; and great seas have dried, King. I must not hear thee: fare thee well, kind maid. Hel. Inspired merit so by breath is barr'd. But know I think, and think I know most sure, Hel. The greatest grace lending grace, Ere twice the horses of the sun shall bring Their fiery torcher his diurnal ring; Ere twice in murk and occidental damp Moist Hesperus hath quench'd his sleepy lamp; Or four and twenty times the pilot's glass Hath told the thievish minutes how they pass, What is infirm from your sound parts shall fly, Health shall live free, and sickness freely die. King. Upon thy certainty and confidence, What dar'st thou venture? Hel. Tax of impudence, A strumpet's boldness, a divulged shame, Traduc'd by odious ballads; my maiden's name Sear'd otherwise; ne worse of worst extended, With vilest torture let my life be ended. King. Methinks, in thee some blessed spirit doth speak, In common sense, sense saves another way. Hel. If I break time, or flinch in property Of what I spoke, unpitied let me die; And well deserv'd. Not helping, death's my fee; But will you make it even? King. Ay, by my sceptre, and my hopes of heaven. Hel. Then shalt thou give me with thy kingly hand What husband in thy power I will command: Exempted be from me the arrogance To choose from forth the royal blood of France, King. Here is my hand; the premises observ'd, More should I question thee, and more I must, Enter COUNTESS and Clown. Count. Come on, sir: I shall now put you to the height of your breeding. Clo. I will show myself highly fed, and lowly taught. I know my business is but to the court. Count. To the court! why, what place make you special, when you put off that with such contempt? But to the court! Clo. Truly, madam, if God have lent a man any manners, he may easily put it off at court: he that cannot make a leg, put off's cap, kiss his hand, and say nothing, has neither leg, hands, lip, nor cap; and, indeed, such a fellow, to say precisely, were not for the court. But, for me, I have an answer will serve all men. Count. Marry, that's a bountiful answer, that fits all questions. Clo. It is like a barber's chair, that fits all buttocks; the pin-buttock, the quatch-buttock, the brawn-buttock, or any buttock. Count. Will your answer serve fit to all questions? Clo. As fit as ten groats is for the hand of an attorney, as your French crown for your taffata punk, as Tib's rush for Tom's forefinger, as a pancake for Shrove-Tuesday, a morris for May-day, as the nail to his hole, the cuckold to his horn, as a scolding quean to a wrangling knave, as the nun's lip to the friar's mouth; nay, as the pudding to his skin. Count. Have you, I say, an answer of such fitness for all questions? Clo. From below your duke, to beneath your constable, it will fit any question. Count. It must be an answer of most monstrous size, that must fit all demands. Clo. But a trifle neither, in good faith, if the learned should speak truth of it. Here it is, and all that belongs to't ask me, if I am a courtier; it shall do you no harm to learn. Count. To be young again, if we could. I will be a fool in question, hoping to be the wiser by your answer. pray you, sir, are you a courtier ? I Clo. O Lord, sir!-there's a simple putting off.More, more, a hundred of them. Count. Sir, I am a poor friend of yours, that loves meat. Clo. O Lord, sir!-Nay, put me to't, I warrant you. Count. Do you cry, "O Lord, sir," at your whipping, and "spare not me?" Indeed, your "O Lord, sir," is very sequent to your whipping: you would answer very well to a whipping, if you were but bound to't. Clo. I ne'er had worse luck in my life, in my "O Lord, sir." I see, things may serve long, but not serve ever. Count. I play the noble housewife with the time, to entertain it so merrily with a fool. Clo. O Lord, sir!-why, there't serves well again. Count. An end, sir: to your business. Give Helen this, And urge her to a present answer back: Clo. Not much commendation to them. Count. Not much employment for you: you understand me? Clo. Most fruitfully: I am there before my legs. Count. Haste you again. [Exeunt severally. SCENE III.-Paris. A Room in the KING'S Palace. Enter BERTRAM, LAFEU, and PAROLLES. Laf. They say, miracles are past; and we have our philosophical persons, to make modern and familiar things supernatural and causeless. Hence is it, that we make trifles of terrors, ensconcing ourselves into seeming knowledge, when we should submit ourselves to an unknown fear. Par. Why, 'tis the rarest argument of wonder, that hath shot out in our latter times. Ber. And so 'tis. Laf. To be relinquished of the artists, Par. So I say; both of Galen and Paracelsus. Laf. That gave him out incurable,- Laf. Not to be helped, Par. Right; as 'twere a man assured of anLaf. Uncertain life, and sure death. Thou hast power to choose, and they none to forsake. Par. Just, you say well; so would I have said. Laf. I may truly say, it is a novelty to the world. Par. It is, indeed: if you will have it in showing, you shall read it in, what do you call there?— Laf. In showing of a heavenly effect in an earthly actor. Par. That's it I would have said; the very same. Laf. Why, your dolphin is not lustier: 'fore me, I speak in respect King. Heaven hath through me restor'd the king to health. Par. Nay, 'tis strange; 'tis very strange, that is the brief and the tedious of it; and he is of a most facinorous spirit, that will not acknowledge it to be theLaf. Very hand of heaven. Par. Ay, so I say. Laf. In a most weak Par. And debile minister, great power, great transcendence; which should, indeed, give us a further use to be made, than alone the recovery of the king, as to be Laf. Generally thankful. Enter KING, HELENA, and Attendants. Par. I would have said it; you say well. Here comes the king. Laf. Lustick, as the Dutchman says: I'll like a maid the better, whilst I have a tooth in my head. Why, he's able to lead her a coranto. Par. Mort du vinaigre! Is not this Helen? Hel. Thanks, sir: all the rest is mute. Laf. I had rather be in this choice, than throw amesace for my life. your fair eyes, Hel. The honour, sir, that flames in Before I speak, too threateningly replies: Love make your fortunes twenty times above Her that so wishes, and her humble love! 2 Lord. No better, if you please. Hel. My wish receive, Which great Love grant! and so I take my leave. Laf. Do all they deny her? An they were sons of mine, I'd have them whipped, or I would send them to the Turk to make eunuchs of. I'll never do you wrong for your own sake: Laf. These boys are boys of ice, they'll none have her: sure, they are bastards to the English; the French ne'er got them. Hel. You are too young, too happy, and too good, To make yourself a son out of my blood. 4 Lord. Fair one, I think not so. Laf. There's one grape yet:-I am sure, thy father drank wine.-But if thou be'st not an ass, I am a youth of fourteen: I have known thee already. Hel. [To BERTRAM.] I dare not say I take you; but Rather corrupt me ever! King. 'Tis only title thou disdain'st in her, the which Is good, without a name; vileness is so: She is young, wise, fair; Where dust, and damn'd oblivion, is the tomb to choose. Hel. That you are well restor'd, my lord, I am glad. Let the rest go. up King. My honour's at the stake, which to defend, We please to have it grow. Check thy contempt: When I consider What great creation, and what dole of honour, King. A balance more replete. Ber. I take her hand. King. Good fortune, and the favour of the king, Par. Recantation?-My lord? my master? Laf. Are you companion to the count Rousillon? Par. You are too old, sir: let it satisfy you, you are too old. Laf. I must tell thee, sirrah, I write man; to which title age cannot bring thee. Par. What I dare too well do, I dare not do. Laf. I did think thee, for two ordinaries, to be a pretty wise fellow thou didst make tolerable vent of thy travel it might pass; yet the scarfs, and the bannerets about thee, did manifoldly dissuade me from believing thee a vessel of too great a burden. I have now found thee: when I lose thee again, I care not; yet art thou good for nothing but taking up, and that thou'rt scarce worth. Par. Had'st thou not the privilege of antiquity upon thee, Laf. Do not plunge thyself too far in anger, lest thou hasten thy trial; which if-Lord have mercy on thee for a hen! So, my good window of lattice, fare thee well: thy casement I need not open, for I look through thee. Give me thy hand. Par. My lord, you give me most egregious indignity. of it. Par. I have not, my lord, deserved it. Laf. Yes, good faith, every drachm of it; and I will not bate thee a scruple. Par. Well, I shall be wiser. Laf. E'en as soon as thou canst, for thou hast to pull at a smack o' the contrary. If ever thou be'st bound in thy scarf, and beaten, thou shalt find what it is to be proud of thy bondage. I have a desire to hold my acquaintance with thee, or rather my knowledge, that I may say, in the default, he is a man I know. Par. My lord, you do me most insupportable vexa tion. Laf. I would it were hell-pains for thy sake, and my poor doing eternal: for doing I am past, as I will by thee, in what motion age will give me leave. [Exit. Par. Well, thou hast a son shall take this disgrace off me, scurvy, old, filthy, scurvy lord!-Well, I must be patient; there is no fettering of authority. I'll beat him, by my life, if I can meet him with any convenience, an he were double and double a lord. I'll have no more pity of his age, than I would have of-I'll beat him an if I could but meet him again. Re-enter LAFEU. of thy sleeves? do other servants so? Thou wert best set thy lower part where thy nose stands. By mine honour, if I were but two hours younger I'd beat thee: methinks, thou art a general offence, and every man should beat thee. I think, thou wast created for men to breathe themselves upon thee. Par. This is hard and undeserved measure, my lord. Laf. Go to, sir; you were beaten in Italy for picking a kernel out of a pomegranate: you are a vagabond, and no true traveller. You are more saucy with lords and honourable personages, than the condition of your birth and virtue gives you heraldry. You are not worth another word, else I'd call you knave. I leave you. [Exit. Enter BERTRAM. Par. Good, very good; it is so then :-good, very good. Let it be concealed a while. Ber. Undone, and forfeited to cares for ever! Ber. Although before the solemn priest I have sworn, I will not bed her. Par. What? what, sweet heart? Ber. O, my Parolles, they have married me! I'll to the Tuscan wars, and never bed her. Par. France is a dog-hole, and it no more merits The tread of a man's foot. To the wars! Ber. There's letters from my mother: what the import is, I know not yet. Enter PAROLLES. Par. Bless you, my fortunate lady! Hel. I hope, sir, I have your good will to have mine own good fortunes. Par. You had my prayers to lead them on; and to keep them on, have them still.-O, my knave! How does my old lady? Clo. So that you had her wrinkles, and I her money, I would she did as you say. Par. Why, I say nothing. Clo. Marry, you are the wiser man; for many a man's tongue shakes out his master's undoing. To say nothing, to do nothing, to know nothing, and to have nothing, is to be a great part of your title, which is within a very little of nothing. Par. Away! thou'rt a knave. Clo. You should have said, sir, before a knave thou'rt a knave; that is, before me thou'rt a knave: this had been truth, sir. Par. Go to, thou art a witty fool: I have found thee. Clo. Did you find me in yourself, sir, or were you taught to find me? Par. Go to, I say: I have found thee: no more; I have found thee, a witty fool. Clo. The search, sir, was profitable; and much fool may you find in you, even to the world's pleasure, and the increase of laughter. Par. A good knave, i' faith, and well fed.- Par. Ay, that would be known. To the wars, my A very serious business calls on him. boy! to the wars! He wears his honour in a box, unseen, Which should sustain the bound and high curvet Ber. It shall be so: I'll send her to my house, Par. Will this capriccio hold in thee, art sure? I'll send her straight away: to-morrow Par. Why, these balls bound; there's noise in it; A young man married is a man that's marr'd: [Exeunt, SCENE IV.-The Same. Another Room in the Same, Enter HELENA and Clown. The great prerogative and rite of love, Hel. My mother greets me kindly is she well? Clo. She is not well; but yet she has her health: she's very merry; but yet she is not well: but thanks be given, she's very well, and wants nothing i' the world; but yet she is not well. Hel. If she be very well, what does she ail, that she's not very well? Clo. Truly, she's very well indeed, but for two things. Whose want, and whose delay, is strew'd with sweets, Clo. One, that she's not in heaven, whither God send her quickly! the other, that she's in earth, from whence God send her quickly! To make the coming hour o'erflow with joy, Par. That you will take your instant leave o' the king, Hel. Hel. In every thing I wait upon his will. I pray you.-Come, sirrah. [Exeunt. Laf. But, I hope, your lordship thinks not him a soldier. Ber. Yes, my lord, and of very valiant approof. Ber. I do assure you, my lord, he is very great in knowledge, and accordingly valiant. Laf. I have then sinned against his experience, and transgressed against his valour; and my state that way is dangerous, since I cannot yet find in my heart to repent. Here he comes. I pray you, make us friends: I will pursue the amity. Enter PAROLLES. Ber. Will she away to-night? Par. As you'll have her. Ber. I have writ my letters, casketed my treasure, Given order for our horses; and to-night, When I should take possession of the bride, End, ere I do begin. Laf. A good traveller is something at the latter end of a dinner; but one that lies three-thirds, and uses a known truth to pass a thousand nothings with, should be once heard, and thrice beaten.-God save you, captain. Ber. Is there any unkindness between my lord and you, monsieur? Par. I know not how I have deserved to run into my lord's displeasure. Laf. You have made shift to run into't, boots and spurs and all, like him that leaped into the custard; and out of it you'll run again, rather than suffer question for your residence. Ber. It may be, you have mistaken him, my lord. Laf. And shall do so ever, though I took him at his prayers. Fare you well, my lord; and believe this of me, there can be no kernel in this light nut; the soul of this man is his clothes: trust him not in matter of heavy consequence; I have kept of them tame, and know their natures. - Farewell, monsieur: I have spoken better of you, than you have or will deserve at my hand; but we must do good against evil. Par. An idle lord, I swear. Ber. I think so. Par. Why, do you not know him? [Exit. Ber. Yes, I do know him well; and common speech Gives him a worthy pass. Here comes my clog. Enter HELENA. Hel. I have, sir, as I was commanded from you, I shall obey his will. You must not marvel, Helen, at my course, So much unsettled. This drives me to entreat you, And ever shall Well, what would you say? Hel. I am not worthy of the wealth I owe; Nor dare I say, 'tis mine, and yet it is, But, like a timorous thief, most fain would steal What law does vouch mine own. What would you have? Hel. Something, and scarce so much:-nothing, indeed. Ber. I would not tell you what I would, my lord-'faith, yes;— Strangers and foes do sunder, and not kiss. Ber. I pray you, stay not, but in haste to horse. Hel. I shall not break your bidding, good my lord. Where are my other men? monsieur, farewell. [Exit. Ber. Go thou toward home; where I will never come, Whilst I can shake my sword, or hear the drum.— Away! and for our flight. Par. Bravely, coragio! [Exeunt. |