'affixed to fome Part of their Bodies, fhewing on which 'Side they are to be come at, and that if any of them are Perfons of unequal Tempers, there fhould be fome 'Method taken to inform the World at what Time it is 'fafe to attack them, and when you had best to let them alone. But, fubmitting these Matters to your more serious Confideration, I am, SIR, yours, &c. I have, indeed, feen and heard of feveral young Gentlemen under the fame Misfortune with my prefent Correfpondent. The beft Rule I can lay down for them to avoid the like Calamities for the future, is thoroughly to confider not only Whether their Companions are weak, but Whether themselves are Wits. THE following Letter comes to me from Exeter, and being credibly informed that what it contains is Matter of Fact, I fhall give it my Reader as it was fent me. Mr. SPECTATOR, Yo . Exeter, Sept. 7. OU were pleafed in a late Speculation to take notice of the Inconvenience we lie under in the Country, in not being able to keep Pace with the Fafhion: But there is another Misfortune which we are fubject to, and is no lefs grievous than the former, which has hitherto efcaped your Observation. I mean, the having Things palmed upon us for London Fashions, which were never once heard of there. A Lady of this Place had fome time fince a Box of the newest Ribbons fent down by the Coach: Whether ◄ it was her own malicious Invention, or the Wantonnefs ⚫ of a London Milliner, I am not able to inform you; but, among the reft, there was one Cherry-coloured Ribbon, confifting of about half a dozen Yards, made up in the Figure of a fmall Head-Drefs. The aforefaid Lady had the Affurance to affirm, amidst a Circle of Female Inquifitors, who were prefent at the opening of the Box, that this was the newest Fashion worn at Court. cordingly the next Sunday we had feveral Females, who came to Church with their Heads drefs'd wholly in • Ribbons, and looked like fo many Victims ready to be facrificed. This is ftill a reigning Mode among us. At Ac • the the fame time we have a Set of Gentlemen who take 'the Liberty to appear in all publick Places without any "Buttons to their Coats, which they supply with several ⚫ little Silver Hafps, tho' our fresheft Advices from London ⚫ make no mention of any fuch Fashion; and we are ⚫fomething fhy of affording Matter to the Button-makers for a fecond Petition. WHAT I would humbly propofe to the Publick is, • that there may be a Society erected in London, to con'fift of the moft skilful Perfons of both Sexes, for the Infpection of Modes and Fashions; and that hereafter no Perfon or Perfons fhall prefume to appear fingularly ha 'bited in any Part of the Country, without a Testimonial 'from the aforefaid Society, that their Dress is answerable to the Mode at London. By this means, Sir, we ' fhall know a little whereabout we are. IF you could bring this Matter to bear, you would very much oblige great Numbers of your Country Friends, and among the rest, X Your very humble Servant, Jack Modifh. N° 176 Friday, September 21. Parvula, pumilio, xaciτwv μía, tota merum fal. A little, pretty, witty, charming She! T HERE are in the following Letter Matters, which I, a Bachelor, cannot be fuppofed to be acquainted with; therefore fhall not pretend to explain upon it till farther Confideration, but leave the Author of the Epistle to exprefs his Condition his own Way. 6 Mr. SPECTATOR, DO not deny but you appear in many of your Papers to understand Human Life pretty well; but there are very many Things which you cannot poffibly have a true Notion of, in a fingle Life; these are fuch as refpect ⚫ the married State; otherwife I cannot account for your ⚫ having overlooked a very good Sort of People,which arecommonly called in Scorn the Hen-peckt. You are to un⚫derstand that I am one of thofe innocent Mortals who fuffer Derifion under that Word, for being governed by ⚫ the best of Wives. It would be worth your Confidera⚫tion to enter into the Nature of Affection itself, and tell us, according to your Philofophy, why it is that our Dears fhould do what they will with us, fhall be froward, ill-natured, affuming, fometimes whine, at others rail, ⚫ then fwoon away, then come to Life, have the Ufe of Speech to the greateft Fluency imaginable, and then fink away again, and all because they fear we do not love them enough; that is, the poor Things love us fo heartily, that they cannot think it poffible we fhould be able to love them in fo great a Degree, which makes them take on fo. I fay, Sir, a true good-natured Man, whom Rakes and Libertines call Hen-peckt, fhall fall into all these different Moods with his dear Life, and at the fame time fee they are wholly put on; and yet not be hard-hearted enough to tell the dear good Creature that fhe is an Hypocrite. 6 THIS fort of good Men is very frequent in the popu lous and wealthy City of London, and is the true Hen-peckt Man; the kind Creature cannot break through his Kindneffes fo far as to come to an Explanation with the • tender Soul, and therefore goes on to comfort her when nothing ails her, to appease her when she is not angry, and to give her his Cafh when he knows fhe does not: want it, rather than be uneafy for a whole Month, which is computed by hard-hearted Men the Space of • Time which a froward Woman takes to come to herself, if you have Courage to ftand out. THERE are indeed feveral other Species of the Hen-peckt, and in my Opinion they are certainly the best Subjects the Queen has; and for that Reafon Itake it to be your Duty to keep us above Contempt. I do 6. 'I do not know whether I make myfelf understood in "the Representation of an Hen-peckt Life, but I fhall take leave to give you an Account of myself, and my own: Spouse. You are to know that I am reckoned no Fool, have on feveral Occafions been tried whether I will takeIll-ufage, and the Event has been to my Advantage; and yet there is not fuch a Slave in Turkey as I am to my "Dear. She has a good Share of Wit, and is what youcall a very pretty agreeable Woman. I perfectly dote on her, and my Affection to her gives me all the Anxie ties imaginable but that of Jealoufy.. My being thus 'confident of her, I take, as much as I can judge of my Heart, to be the Reason, that whatever fhe does, tho' it "be never fo much against my Inclination, there is still: left fomething in her Manner that is amiable. She will fometimes look at me with an affumed Grandeur, and "pretend to refent that I have not had Refpe&t enough for her Opinion in fuch an Inftance in Company, I cannot but fmile at the pretty Anger fhe is in, and then the pre-"tends fhe is ufed like a Child. In a word, our great De"bate is, which has the Superiority in point of Underftanding. She is eternally forming an Argument of De-bate; to which I very indolently answer, Thou art mighty pretty. To this fhe anfwers, All the World but you think "I have as much Senfe as yourfelf. I repeat to her, In-"deed you are pretty. Upon this there is no Patience ;; "the will throw down any thing about her, ftamp and pull 'off her Head-Clothes. Fy, my Dear, fay I; how cans a Woman of your Senfe fall into fuch an intemperate: Rage? This is an Argument which never fails. Indeed,. my Dear, fays fhe, you make me mad fometimes, fo you do, with the filly Way you have of treating me: like a pretty Idiot. Well, what have I got by putting, her into Good-humour? Nothing, but that I muft.con-"vince her of my good Opinion by my Practice; and "then I am to give her Poffeffion of my little Ready. Money, and, for a Day and a half following, diflike.all fhe dislikes, and extol every thing the approves. I am. "fo exquifitely fond of this Darling, that I feldom fee any "of my Friends, am uneafy in all Companies till I fee: "her again; and when I come home fhe is in the Dumps, because the fays.fhe is fure I came fo foon only because I 6. C 6. thinki 'think her handfom. I dare not upon this Occafion laugh; but tho' I am one of the warmest Churchmen in the Kingdom, I am forced to rail at the Times, because fhe is a violent Whig. Upon this we talk Politicks fo long, that she is convinc'd I kifs her for her Wisdom. It is a common Practice with me to ask her some Que⚫ftion concerning the Conftitution, which she answers me in general out of Harrington's Oceana: Then I commend her ftrange Memory, and her Arm is immediately 'lock'd in mine. While I keep her in this Temper the plays before me, fometimes dancing in the midst of the Room, fometimes ftriking an Air at her Spinnet, varying her Pofture and her Charms in fuch a manner that 'I am in continual Pleafure: She will play the Fool, if I ⚫ allow her to be wife; but if fhe fufpects I like her for ⚫her Trifling, fhe immediately grows grave. THESE are the Toils in which I am taken, and I carry off my Servitude as well as moft Men; but my Application to you is in behalf of the Hen-peckt in general, and I defire a Differtation from you in Defence of us. You have, as I am informed, very good Au'thorities in our Favour, and hope you will not omit the ⚫ mention of the Renowned Socrates, and his Philofophick Refignation to his Wife Xantippe. This would be a very good Office to the World in general, for the Hen-peckt ⚫ are powerful in their Quality and Numbers, not only in Cities but in Courts; in the latter they are ever the most obfequious, in the former the moft wealthy of all Men. When you have confidered Wedlock thoroughly, you ought to enter into the Suburbs of Matrimony, and give ⚫ us an Account of the Thraldom of kind Keepers, and ⚫ irrefolute Lovers; the Keepers who cannot quit their Fair Ones, tho' they fee their approaching Ruin; the Lovers who dare not marry, tho' they know they never fhall be happy without the Miftreffes whom they cannot purchase on other Terms. WHAT will be a great Embellishment to your Difcourse, will be, that you may find Inftances of the Haughty, the Proud, the Frolick, the Stubborn, who are each of them in fecret downright Slaves to their ' Wives or Miftreffes. I muft beg of you in the laft Place to dwell upon this, That the Wife and Valiant in all : Ages |