N° 280 Monday, January 21.

Principibus placuiffe viris non ultima laus eft.

Hor. Ep. 17. lib. ver. 35.

To please the great is not the smallest praise. CREECH.

T

HE defire of pleafing makes a man agreeable or unwelcome to thofe with whom he converses, according to the motive from which that incli nation appears to flow. If your concern for pleafing others arifes from an innate benevolence, it never fails of fuccefs; if from a vanity to excel, its difappointment is no lefs certain. What we call an agreeable man, is he who is endowed with the natural bent to do acceptable things from a delight he takes in them merely as fuch; and the affectation of that character is what conftitutes a fop. Under thefe leaders one may draw up all those who make any manner of figure, except in dumb fhow. A rational and felect converfation is compofed of perfons, who have the talent of pleafing with delicacy of fentiments flowing from habitual chaftity of thought; but mixed company is frequently made up of pretenders to mirth, and is ufually pestered with constrained, obfcene, and painful witticifms. Now and then you meet with a man, fo exactly formed for pleafing, that it is no matter what he is doing or faying, that is to fay, that there need be no manner of importance in it, to make him gain upon every body who hears or beholds him. This felicity is not the gift of nature only, but must be attended with happy circumftances, which add a dignity to the familiar behaviour which diftinguishes him whom we call an agreeable man. It is from this that every body loves and efteems Polycarpus. He is in the vigour of his age and the gaiety of life, but has paffed through very confpicuous fcenes in it; though no foldier, he has fhared the danger,

3

danger, and acted with great gallantry and generofity on a decifive day of battle. To have thofe qualities which only make other men confpicuous in the world as it were fupernumerary to him, is a circumftance which gives weight to his moft indifferent actions; for as a known credit is ready cash to a trader, fo is acknowledged merit immediate diftinction, and ferves in the place of equipage to a gentleman. This renders Polycarpus graceful in mirth, important in bufinefs, and regarded with love, in every ordinary occurrence. But

not to dwell upon characters which have such particular recommendations to our hearts, let us turn our thoughts rather to the methods of pleafing which muft carry men through the world who cannot pretend to fuch advantages. Falling in with the particular humour or manner of one above you, abstracted from the general rules of good behaviour, is the life of a flave. A parafite differs in nothing from the meaneft fervant, but that the footman hires himself for bodily labour, fubjected to go and come at the will of his mafter, but the other gives up his very foul: he is prostituted to fpeak, and profeffes to think after the mode of him whom he courts. fervitude to a patron, in an honeft nature, would be more grievous than that of wearing his livery; therefore we will fpeak of those methods only, which are worthy and ingenuous.

This

The happy talent of pleafing either those above you or below you, feems to be wholly owing to the opinion they have of your fincerity This quality is to attend the agreeable man in all the actions of his life; and I think there need no more be said in honour of it, than that it is what forces the approbation even of your opponents. The guilty man has an honour for the judge who with juftice pronounces against him the fentence of death itself. The author of the fentence at the head of this paper, was an excellent judge of human life, and paffed his own in company the most agreeable that ever was in the world. Auguftus lived amongst his friends as if he had his fortune to make in his own court: Candour and affability, accompanied with as much power as ever mortal was vefted with, were what made him in the utmost manner agreeable among a set of admirable

men,

men, who had thoughts too high for ambition, and views too large to be gratified by what he could give them in the difpofal of an empire, without the pleasures of their mutual converfation. A certain unanimity of tafte and judgment, which is natural to all of the fame order in the species, was the band of this fociety; and the emperor affumed no figure in it, but what he thought was his due from his private talents and qualifications, as they contributed to advance the pleasures and fentiments of the company.

Cunning people, hypocrites, all who are but half virtuous, or half wife, are incapable of tafting the refined pleasure of fuch an equal company as could wholly exclude the regard of fortune in their converfations. Horace, in the discourse from whence I take the hint of the present speculation, lays down excellent rules for conduct in converfation with men of power; but he speaks it with an air of one who had no need of fuch an application for any thing which related to himself. It fhews he understood what it was to be a skilful courtier, by juft admonitions against importunity, and fhewing how forcible it was to fpeak modeftly of your own wants. There is indeed fomething fo fhameless in taking all opportunities to fpeak of your own affairs, that he who is guilty of it towards him on whom he depends, fares like the beggar, who exposes his fores, which instead of moving compaffion makes the man he begs of turn away from the object.

I cannot tell what is become of him, but I remember about fixteen years ago an honest fellow, who so justly understood how difagreeable the mention or appearance of his wants would make him, that I have often reflected upon him as a counterpart of Irus, whom I have formerly mentioned. This man, whom I have miffed for fome years in my walks, and have heard was fome way employed about the army, made it a maxim, That good wigs, delicate linen, and a chearful air, were to a poor dependent the fame that working tools are to a poor artificer. It was no fmall entertainment to me, who knew his circumftances, to see him, who had fasted two days, attribute the thinnefs they told him of to the violence

violence of fome gallantries he had lately been guilty of The skilful diffembler carried this on with the utmost addrefs; and if any fufpected his affairs were narrow, it was attributed to indulging himself in some fashion. able vice rather than an irreproachable poverty, which faved his credit with those on whom he depended.

The main art is to be as little troublesome as you can, and make all you hope for come rather as a favour from your patron than claim from you. But I am here prating of what is the method of pleasing so as to fucceed in the world, when there are crowds who have, in city, town, court, and country, arrived to confiderable acquifitions, and yet feem incapable of acting in any constant tenour of life, but have gone on from one fuccefsful error to another: Therefore I think I may fhorten this inquiry after the method of pleafing; and as the old beau faid to his fon, once for all, Pray, Jack, be a fine gentleman, so may I, to my reader, abridge my inftructions, and finish the art of pleafing, in a word, Be rich. T

N° 281

Tuesday, January 22.

Peltoribus inhians fpirantia confulit exta.

Virg. Æn. 4. ver. 64. Anxious the reeking entrails he confults.

H

AVING already given an account of the dif fection of a Beau's Head, with the feveral difcoveries made on that occafion; I fhall here, according to my promise, enter upon the diffection of a Coquette's Leart, and communicate to the publick fuch particularities as we obferved in that curious piece of

anatomy.

I fhould perhaps have waved this undertaking, had not I been put in mind of my promise by feveral of my unknown correfpondents, who are very importunate with me to make an example of the coquette, as I have already done of the beau. It is therefore in compliance

with

with the request of friends, that I have looked over the minutes of my former dream, in order to give the publick an exact relation of it, which I fhall enter upon without farther preface.

Our operator, before he engaged in this vifionary diffection, told us, that there was nothing in his art more difficult than to lay open the heart of a coquette, by reafon of the many labyrinths and recesses which are to be found in it, and which do not appear in the heart of any other animal.

He defired us first of all to obferve the Pericardium, or outward cafe of the heart, which we did very attentively; and by the help of our glaffes difcerned in it millions of little fcars, which feemed to have been occafioned by the points of innumerable darts and arrows, that from time to time had glanced upon the outward coat; though we could not difcover the fmalleft orifice, by which any of them had entered and pierced the inward fubftance.

Every fmatterer in anatomy knows that this Pericardium, or cafe of the heart, contains in it a thin reddish liquor, fuppofed to be bred from the vapours which exhale out of the heart, and, being stopt here, are condenfed into this watry fubftance. Upon examining this liquor, we found that it had in it all the qualities of that spirit which is made ufe of in the thermometer, to fhew the change of weather.

Nor must I here omit an experiment one of the company affured us he himself had made with this liquor, which he found in great quantity about the heart of a coquette whom he had formerly diffected. He affirmed to us, that he had actually inclosed it in a fmall tube made after the manner of a weather-glafs; but that intead of acquainting him with the variations of the atmosphere, it shewed him the qualities of thofe perfons who entered the room where it ftood. He affirmed alfo, that it rofe at the approach of a plume of feathers, an embroidered coat, or a pair of fringed gloves; and that it fell as foon as an ill-fhaped periwig, a clumfy pair of fhoes, or an unfashionable coat came into his houfe: Nay, he proceeded fo far as to affure us, that upon his laughing aloud when he stood by it, the li VOL. IV.

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