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Touch. By my troth, yes; I count it but time kost to hear such a foolish song. God be with you; and God mend your voices! Come, Audrey. [Exeunt.
SCENE IV.-Another part of the Forest.
Oliver, and CELIA.
Oli. I sometimes do believe, and sometimes do not; As those that fear,--they hope, and know they fear.
Enter ROSALIND, Suvius, and PHEBE. Ros. Patience once more, whiles our compact is
urg'd :You say, if I bring in your Rosalind, [To the Duke. You will bestow her on Orlando here? Duke S. That would I, had I kingdoms to give with
her. Ros. And you say, you will have her, when I bring her
[To ORLANDO Orl. That would I, were I of all kingdoms king. Ros. You say, you 'll marry me, if I be willing?
[To PHEBE. Phe. That will I, should I die the hour after.
Ros. But, if you do refuse to marry me,
Phe. So is the bargain.
[To S.L. Sil. Though to have her and death were both one
thing. Ros. I have promis’d to make all this matter even. Keep you your word, O duke, to give your daughter;-You yours, Orlando, to receive his daughter :
Keep you your word, Phebe, that you 'll marry me;
go, To make these doubts all even. [Ex. Ros. and Cel.
Duke s. I do remember in this shepherd-boy
Orl. My lord, the first time that I ever saw him,
Enter TOUCHSTONE and AUDREY. Jaq. There is, sure, another flood toward, and these couples are coming to the ark! Here comes a pair of very strange beasts, which in all tongues are called fools.
Touch. Salutation and greeting to you all!
Jaq. Good my lord, bid him welcome. This is the motley-minded gentleman that I have so often met in the forest : he hath been a courtier, he swears.
Touch. If any man doubt that, let him put me to my purgation. I have trod a measure; I have flattered a lady; I have been politic with my friend, smooth
Ι with mine enemy; I have undone three tailors; I have had four quarrels, and like to have fought one.
Jaq. And how was that ta'en up? a
Touch. 'Faith, we met, and found the quarrel was upon the seventh cause?
Jaq. How, seventh cause ?-Good my lord, like this fellow.
Duke s. I like him very well.
a Ta'en up-made up.
Touch. God 'ild you, sir; I desire you of the like. I press in here, sir, amongst the rest of the country copulatives, to swear, and to forswear; according as marriage binds, and blood breaks: A poor virgin, sir, an ill-favoured thing, sir, but mine own; a poor humour of mine, sir, to take that that no man else will : Rich honesty dwells like a miser, sir, in a poor house; as your pearl in your foul oyster.
Duke S. By my faith, he is very swift and sententious.
Touch. According to the fool's bolt, sir, and such dulcet diseases.
Jaq. But, for the seventh cause; how did you find the quarrel on the seventh cause ?
Touch. Upon a lie seven times removed ;-Bear your body more seeming, a Audrey :-as thus, sir. I did dislike the cut of a certain courtier's beard; he sent me word, if I said his beard was not cut well, he was in the mind it was : This is called the “Retort courteous." If I sent him word again, it was not well cut, he would send me word, he cut it to please himself: This is called the “ Quip modest.” If again, it was not well cut, he disabled b my judgment: This is called the “ Reply churlish." if again, it was not well cut, he would answer, I spake not true: This is called the “ Reproof valiant." If again, it was not well cut, he would say, I lie: This is called the “ Countercheck quarrelsome :" and so to the “ Lie circumstantial,” and the “ Lie direct."
Jaq. And how oft did you say, his beard was not well cut?
Touch. I durst go no further than the “ Lie circumstantial,” n or he durst not give me the “ Lie direct :" and so we measured swords and parted.
Jaq. Can you nominate in order now the degrees of the lie? & Seeming-seemly.
Touch. O sir, we quarrel in print, by the book ; as you have books for good manners.
I will name you the degrees. The first, the Retort courteous; the se cond, the Quip modest; the third, the Reply churlish ; the fourth, the Reproof valiant; the fifth, the Countercheck quarrelsome; the sixth, the Lie with circumstance; the seventh, the Lie direct. All these you may avoid, but the lie direct; and you may avoid that too, with an If. I knew when seven justices could not take up a quarrel; but when the parties were met themselves, one of them thought but of an If, as, “If you said so, then I said so;” and they shook hands, and swore brothers. Your If is the only peace-maker; much virtue in If.
Jaq. Is not this a rare fellow, my lord ? he's as good at anything, and yet a fool.
Duke s. He uses his folly like a stalking-horse, and under the presentation of that he shoots his wit. Enter Hymen, leading ROSALIND and CELIA.
Then is there mirth in heaven,
Atone together. A
Yea, brought her hither;
Whose heart within her bosom is.
[To DUKE S. To you I give myself, for I am yours. [To ORLANDO. Duke S. If there be truth in sight, you are my
daughter. Orl. If there be truth in sight, you are my Roo
a Atone together-unite.
Phe. If sight and shape be true,
[To DUKE S. I'll have no husband, if you be not he :- [ To Orl. Nor ne'er wed woman, if you be not she. [ To Pue, Hym. Peace, ho! I bar confusion :
'Tis I must make conclusion
Of these most strange events :
If truth holds true contents.
[To Orl. and Ros. You and you are heart in heart :
[To Oli. and Cel.
[ To Touch, and Aud.
O blessed bond of board and bed !
High wedlock then be honoured :
To Hymen, god of every town!
Even daughter, welcome in no less degree.
a Questioning ---discoursing.