Pro. Nay, if the gentle spirit of moving words Can no way change you to a milder form, Thou friend of an ill-fashion! Pro. Valentine! [faith or love; Val. Thou common friend, that's without (For such is a friend now) treach'rous man! Thou hast beguil'd my hopes: nought but mine eye Could have persuaded me. Now I dare not say, Who should be trusted now, when one's right curst! [worst! 'Mongst all foes, that a friend should be the Val. Is nor of heaven, nor earth; for these are pleas'd. By penitence th' Eternal's wrath's appeas'd:- [Faints. Pro. But how cam'st thou by this ring? At my depart I gave this unto Julia. Jul. And Julia herself did give it me; And Julia herself hath brought it hither. Pro. How! Julia! [oaths, Jul. Behold her that gave aim to all thy And entertain'd them deeply in her heart: How oft hast thou with perjury cleft the root ! O Proteus! let this habit make thee blush: Be thou asham'd, that I have took upon me Such an immodest raiment,-if shame live In a disguise of love. It is the lesser blot, modesty finds, Women to change their shapes, than men their minds. Pro. Than men their minds! 'tis true. heaven! were man But constant, he were perfect: that one error Fills him with faults; makes him run through all sins: Inconstancy falls off, ere it begins. Val. Come, come, a hand from either. Let me be blest to make this happy close: 'Twere pity two such friends should be long foes. Pro. Bear witness, heaven, I have my wish for ever. Jul. And I mine. Enter Outlaws, with Duke and Thurio. Out. A prize! a prize! a prize! [the duke.-Val. Forbear, forbear, I say! it is my lord Your grace is welcome to a man disgrac'd, Banished Valentine. Duke. Sir Valentine! Thu. Yonder is Silvia; and Silvia's mine. Val. Thurio, give back, or else embrace thy death. Come not within the measure of my wrath : Thu. Sir Valentine, I care not for her, I: To make such means for her as thou hast done, I now beseech you, for your daughter's sake, Duke. I grant it, for thine own, whate'er it With our discourse to make your grace to Val. These banish'd men, that I have kept What think you of this page, my lord? withal, Are men endu'd with worthy qualities: and thee: he blushes. [than boy. along, That you will wonder what hath fortuned.-- Dispose of them, as thou know'st their deserts.-The story of your loves discovered: SCENE I.-Windsor, Before Page's House. Shal. Sir Hugh, persuade me not; I will make a Star-chamber matter of it: if he were twenty Sir John Falstaffs, he shall not abuse Robert Shallow, Esquire. Slen. In the county of Gloster, justice of peace and coram. Bardolph, Pistol, Nym, followers of Falstaff. Simple, servant to Slender. Mistress Ford. Mistress Page. Anne Page, her daughter, in love with Fenton. Servants to Page, Ford, &c. and the neighbourhood. Shal. The luce is the fresh fish; the salt fish is an old coat. Slen. I may quarter, coz? Shal. You may, by marrying. Eva. It is marring, indeed, if he quarter it. Eva. Yes, py'r lady; if he has a quarter of your coat, there is but three skirts for yourself, in my simple conjectures: but that is all one. If Sir John Falstaff have committed disparagements unto you, I am of the church, and will Shal. Ay, cousin Slender, and cust-alorum. be glad to do my benevolence, to make atoneSlen. Ay, and ratolorum too; and a gen-ments and compromises between you. tleman born, master parson; who writes him- Shal. The council shall hear it it is a self armigero,-in any bill, warrant, quittance riot. or obligation, armigero. Eva. It is not meet the council hear a riot; Shal. Ay, that I do; and have done any there is no fear of Got in a riot: the council, time these three hundred years. look you, shall desire to hear the fear of Got, Slen. All his successors, gone before him, and not to hear a riot; take your vizaments in have done't; and all his ancestors that come that. after him, may: they may give the dozen white luces in their coat. Shal. It is an old coat. Shal. Ha o' my life, if I were young again, the sword should end it. Eva. It is petter that friends is the sword, Eva. The dozen white louses do become an and end it: and there is also another device in old coat well; it agrees well, passant: it is a my prain, which, peradventure, prings good familiar beast to man, and signifies-love. discretions with it: there is Anne Page, which is daughter to master George Page, which is pretty virginity. Slen. Mistress Anne Page? She has brown hair, and speaks small, like a woman. Eva. It is that fery person for all the 'orld, as just as you will desire; and seven hundred pounds of monies, and gold, and silver, is her grandsire, upon his death's-bed, (Got deliver to a joyful resurrections!) give, when she is able to overtake seventeen years old. It were a goot motion, if we leave our pribbles and prabbles, and desire a marriage between master Abraham and Mrs. Anne Page. Shal. Did her grandsire leave her seven hundred pound? Eva. Ây, and her father is make her a petter penny. Shal. I know the young gentlewoman; she has good gifts. Eva. Seven hundred pounds, and possibilities, is good gifts. Shal. Well, let us see honest master Page. Is Falstaff there? Eva. Shall I tell you a lie? I do despise a liar, as I do despise one that is false; or as I despise one that is not true. The knight, Sir John, is there; and, I beseech you, be ruled by your well-willers. I will peat the door for master Page. [Knocks.] What, ho! Got pless your house here! Page. [Within.] Who's there? is not that so, master Page? He hath wronged me; indeed, he hath ;-at a word, he hath ;believe me :-Robert Shallow, Esquire, saith, he is wronged. Page. Here comes Sir John. Enter Sir John Falstaff, Bardolph, Nym, and Pistol. Fal. Now, master Shallow,-you'll complain of me to the king? Shal. Knight, you have beaten my men, killed my deer, and broke open my lodge. Fal. But not kissed your keeper's daughter? Shal. Tut, a pin! this shall be answered. Fal. I will answer it straight :-I have done all this. That is now answered. Shal. The council shall know this. Fal. "Twere better for you, if it were known in counsel: you'll be laughed at. Eva. Pauca verba, Sir John; goot worts. Fal. Good worts! good cabbage.-Slender, I broke your head; what matter have you against me? Slen. Marry, sir, I have matter in my head against you; and against your coney-catching rascals, Bardolph, Nym, and Pistol: they carried me to the tavern, and made me drunk, and afterwards picked my pocket. Bard. You Banbury cheese! Pist. How now, Mephostophilus ! Nym. Slice, I say! pauca, pauca; slice! that's my humour. Eva. Here is Got's plessing, and your friend, and justice Shallow; and here young master Slender, that peradventures, shall tell you another tale, if matters grow to your likings.tell, Enter Page. Page. I am glad to see your worships well I thank you for my venison, master Shallow. Shal. Master Page, I am glad to see you: much good do it your good heart! I wished your venison better; it was ill kill'd.-How doth good mistress Page ?-and I thank you always with my heart, la; with my heart. Page. Sir, I thank you. Shal. Sir, I thank you; by yea and no, I do. Slen. How does your fallow greyhound, sir? 'tis Slen. You'll not confess, you'll not confess. Shal. That he will not:-'tis your fault, your fault:-'Tis a good dog. Page. A cur, sir. Shal. Sir, he's a good dog, and a fair dog; can there be more said? he is good, and fair. --Is Sir John Falstaff here? Page. Sir, he is within; and I would I could do a good office between you. Eva. It is spoke as a Christians ought to speak. Shal. He hath wronged me, master Page. Page. Sir, he doth in some sort confess it. Shal. If it be confessed, it is not redressed ; Slen. Where's Simple, my man? can you cousin? Eva. Peace, I pray you. Now let us understand: there is three umpires in this matter, as I understand; that is-master Page, fidelicet, master Page; and there is myself, delicet, myself; and the three party is, lastly and finally, mine host of the Garter. Page. We three, to hear it, and end it between them. Eva. Fery goot: I will make a prief of it in my note-book; and we will afterwards 'ork upon the cause, with as great discreetly as we Fal. Pistol, Pist. He hears with ears. [can. Eva. The tevil and his tam! what phrase is this, "He hears with ear t" Why, it is affectations. [purse? Fal. Pistol, did you pick master Slender's Slen. Ay, by these gloves, did he,-or I would I might never come in mine own great chamber again else,-of seven groats in millsixpences, and two Edward shovel-boards, that cost me two shilling and two pence apiece of Yead Miller, by these gloves. Fal. Is this true, Pistol? Word of denial: froth and scum, thou liest. Slen. By these gloves, then, 'twas he. Nvm. Be avised, sir, and pass good humours. I will say, "marry trap," with you, if you run the nuthook's humour on me; that is the very note of it. Slen. By his that, then, he in the red face had it; for though I cannot remember what I did when you made me drunk, yet I am not altogether an ass. Fal. What say you, Scarlet and John? Bard. Why, sir, for my part, I say, the gentleman had drunk himself out of his five sentences, Eva. It is his "five senses:" fie, what the ignorance is! Bard. And being fap, sir, was, as they say, cashier'd; and so conclusions pass'd the careires. Slen. Ay, you spake in Latin then too; but 'tis no matter: I'll ne'er be drunk whilst I live again, but in honest, civil, godly company, for this trick; if I be drunk, I'll be drunk with those that have the fear of God, and not with drunken knaves. [mind. Eva. So Got 'udge me, that is a virtuous Fal. You hear all these matters denied, gentlemen; you hear it. Enter Anne Page, with Wine; Mistress Ford and Mistress Page. Page. Nay, daughter, carry the wine in; we'll drink within. [Exit Anne Page. Slen. O heaven! this is mistress Anne Page. Page. How now, mistress Ford! Fal. Mistress Ford, by my troth, you are very well met: by your leave, good mistress. [Kissing her. Page. Wife, bid these gentlemen welcome.Come, we have a hot venison pasty to dinner: come, gentlemen, I hope we shall drink down all unkindness. [Exeunt all but Shallow, Slender, and Evans. Slen. I had rather than forty shillings, I had my book of Songs and Sonnets here.Enter Simple. How now, Simple! Where have you been? I must wait on myself, must I? You have not the Book of Riddles about you, have you? Sim. Book of Riddles? why, did you not lend it to Alice Shortcake upon Allhallowmas last, a fortnight afore Michaelmas ? Shal. Come, coz; come, coz; we stay for you. A word with you, coz; marry, this, coz there is, as 'twere a tender, a kind of tender, made afar off by Sir Hugh here: do you understand me? Slen. Ay, sir, you shall find me reasonable if it be so, I shall do that that is reason. Shal. Nay, but understand me. Slen. So I do, sir. Eva. Give ear to his motions, master Slender: I will description the matter to you, if you be capacity of it. Slen. Nay, I will do as my cousin Shallow | says: I pray you pardon me; he's a justice of peace in his country, simple though I stand here. Eva. But that is not the question: the question is concerning your marriage, Shal. Ay, there's the point, sir. Eva. Marry, is it; the very point of it; to mistress Anne Page. Slen. Why, if it be so, I will marry her upon any reasonable demands. Eva. But can you affection the 'oman? Let us command to know that of your mouth, or of your lips; for divers philosophers hold, that the lips is parcel of the mouth: therefore, precisely, can you carry your good will to the maid? [her? Shal. Cousin Abraham Slender, can you love Slen. I hope, sir, I will do as it shall become one that would do reason. Eva. Nay, Got's lords and his ladies, you must speak possitable, if you can carry her your desires towards her. Shal. That you must. Will you, upon good dowry, marry her? Slen. I will do a greater thing than that, upon your request, cousin, in any reason. Can Shal. Nay, conceive me, conceive me, sweet coz what I do, is to pleasure you, coz. you love the maid ? Slen. I will marry her, sir, at your request; but if there be no great love in the beginning, yet heaven may decrease it upon better acquaintance, when we are married, and have more occasion to know one another: I hope, upon familiarity will grow more contempt; but if you say, "Marry her," I will marry her : that I am freely dissolved, and dissolutely. Eva. It is a fery discretion answer; save, the faul' is in the 'ort "dissolutely:" the 'ort is, according to our meaning, "resolutely."— His meaning is goot. la. Shal. Ay, I think my cousin meant well. Slen. Ay, or else I would I might be hanged, Shal. Here comes fair mistress Anne.-[Reenter Anne Page.] Would I were young for your sake, mistress Anne. Anne. The dinner is on the table; my father desires your worships' company. Shal. I will wait on him, fair mistress Anne. Eva. Od's plessed will! I will not be absence at the grace. [Exeunt Shallow and Sir H. Evans. Anne. Will't please your worship to come in, sir? Slen. No, I thank you, forsooth, heartily; I am very well. Anne. The dinner attends you, sir. Slen. I am not a-hungry, I thank you forsooth.-Go, sirrah, for all you are my man, go, wait upon my cousin Shallow. [Exit Simple.] A justice of peace sometime may be beholden to his friend for a man.-I keep but three men and a boy yet, till my mother be dead; but what though? yet I live like a poor gentleman born. Anne. I may not go in without your worship: they will not sit, till you come. Slen. I'faith, I'll eat nothing; I thank you as much as though I did, Anne. I pray you, sir, walk in. Host. What says my bully-rook? Speak scholarly and wisely. Fal. Truly, mine host, I must turn away some of my followers. Host. Discard, bully Hercules; cashier: let them wag; trot, trot. Fal. I sit at ten pounds a week. Host. Thou'rt an emperor, Cæsar, Keisar, and Pheezar. I will entertain Bardolph; he shall draw, he shall tap: said I well, bully Hector? Fal. Do so, good mine host. Slen. I had rather walk here, I thank you. I bruised my shin the other day with playing at sword and dagger with a master of fence,three veneys for a dish of stewed prunes;and, by my troth, I cannot abide the smell of hot meat since.-Why do your dogs bark so? Host. I have spoke; let him follow.-Let be there bears i' the town? [talked of. me see thee froth and lime: I am at a word; Anne. I think there are, sir, I heard them follow. [Exit. Slen. I love the sport well; but I shall as Fal. Bardolph, follow him. A tapster is a soon quarrel at it as any man in England.-good trade: an old cloak makes a new jerkin; You are afraid, if you see the bear loose, are a withered serving-man, a fresh tapster. Go; Anne. Ay, indeed, sir. [you not? adieu. Slen. That's meat and drink to me, now: Bard. It is a life that I have desired: I will I have seen Sackerson loose twenty times, and Pist. O base Gongarian wight! wilt thou have taken him by the chain; but, I warrant the spigot wield? [Exit Bard. you, the women have so cried and shriek'd at Nym. He was gotten in drink is not the it, that it passed: but women, indeed, cannot humour conceited? His mind is not heroic, abide 'em; they are very ill-favoured rough and there's the humour of it. things. Re-enter Page. Page. Come, gentle master Slender, come; we stay for you. Slen. I'll eat nothing, I thank you, sir. Page. By cock and pye, you shall not choose, sir: come, come. Slen. Nay, pray you, lead the way. Slen. Mistress Anne, yourself shall go first. Slen. I'll rather be unmannerly, than troublesome. You do yourself wrong, indeed, la. [Exeunt. SCENE II.-The Same. Enter Sir Hugh Evans and Simple. Eva. Go your ways, and ask of Dr Caius' house, which is the way: and there dwells one mistress Quickly, which is in the manner of his nurse, or his dry nurse, or his cook, or his laundry, his washer, and his wringer. Sim. Well, sir. Eva. Nay, it is petter yet.-Give her this letter; for it is a 'oman that altogethers acquaintance with mistress Anne Page: and the letter is, to desire and require her to solicit your master's desires to mistress Anne Page. pray you, be gone. I will make an end of my dinner; there's pippins and cheese to come. [Exeunt. SCENE III.-A Room in the Garter Inn. Enter Falstaff, Host, Bardolph, Nym, Pistol, and Robin. Fal. Mine host of the Garter, [thrive. Fal. I am glad I am so acquit of this tinderbox: his thefts were too open; his filching was like an unskilful singer, he kept not time. Nym. The good humour is to steal at a minute's rest. Pist. Convey," the wise it call. "Steal !" foh! a fico for the phrase ! Fal. Well, sirs, am almost out at heels. Fal. There is no remedy; I must coneycatch; I must shift. Pist. Young ravens must have food. good. Fal. No quips now, Pistol: indeed, I am in the waist two yards about; but I am now about no waste; I am about thrift. Briefly, I do mean to make love to Ford's wife: I spy entertainment in her; she discourses, she carves, she gives the leer of invitation: I can construe the action of her familiar style; and the hardest voice of her behaviour, to be Englished rightly, is, "I am Sir John Falstaff's." Pist. He hath studied her well, and translated her well,-out of honesty into English. Nym. The anchor is deep: will that humour pass? Fal. Now, the report goes, she has all the rule of her husband's purse; he hath a legion of angels. Pist. As many devils entertain; and "To her, boy," say I. Nym. The humour rises; it is good: humour me the angels. Fal. I have writ me here a letter to her; |