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There's not a hair on's head, but 'tis a Kalentine, f

Pro. Valentine,

Val. No.

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Pro. Who then; his fpirit?

Val. Neither.

Pro. What then?.

Val. Nothing.

Laun. Can nothing speak? mafter, fhall I strike? Pro. Whom wouldst thou strike?

Laun. Nothing,

Pro. Villain, forbear.

Laun. Why, Sir, I'll ftrike nothing; I pray you,Pro. I fay, forbear: friend Valentine, a word. Val. My ears are ftopt, and cannot hear good news; So much of bad already hath poffeft them.

I

Pro. Then in dumb filence will I bury mine;
For they are harsh, untuneable, and bad.
Val. Is Silvia dead?

Pro. No, Valentine.

Val. No Valentine, indeed, for facred Silvia! Hath fhe forfworn me?

Pro. No,

Val. No Ventine.

What is your news?

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if Silvia have forfworn me! >

Laun. Sir, there's a proclamation that you are vanish'd.

Pro. That thou art banish'd; oh, that is the news, From hence, from Silvia, and from me thy friend. Val. Oh, I have fed upon this woe already; And now excefs of it will make me furfeit. Doth Silvia know that I am banished?

Pro. Ay, ay; and fhe hath offer'd to the doom, Which unrevers'd ftands in effectual force,

A fea of melting pearl, which fome call

tears

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Thole at her father's churlish feet the tender'd, With them, upon her knees, her humble felf Wringing her hands, whofe whiteness fo became them,

As if but now they waxed pale for wo.

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But neither bended knees, pure hands held up,
Sad fighs, deep groans, nor filver-fhedding tears,
Could penetrate her uncompaffionate Sire
But Valentine, if he be ta'en, muft die.
Befides, her interceffion chaf'd him fo,
When the for thy repeal was fuppliant,
That to close prifon he commanded her,
With many bitter threats of 'biding there.

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Vat. No more; unless the next word that thou fpeak'ft,

Have fome malignant power upon my life

If fo, I pray thee, breathe it in mine ear,
As ending anthem of my endless dolour.

Pro. Ceafe to lament for that thou canst not help,
And ftudy help for that which thou lament ft.
Time is the nurfe and breeder of all good:
Here if thou stay, thou canst not fee thy love;
Befides, thy ftaying will abridge thy life.
"Hope is a lover's ftaff; walk hence with that;
And manage it against despairing thoughts.
Thy letters may be here, tho' thou art hence,
Which, being writ to me, fhall be deliver'd
Ev'n in the milk-white bofom of thy love.
The time now ferves not to expoftulate
Come, I'll convey thee through the city-gate;
And, ere I part with thee, confer at large
Of all that may concern thy love-affairs:
As thou lov't Silvia, tho' not for thyfelf,
Regard thy danger, and along with me.

Val. I pray thee, Launce, an' if thou feest my boy, Bid him make hafte, and meet me at the north-gate, Pro. Go, Sirrah, find him out: come, Valentine. Val. O my dear Silvia! haplefs Valentine"!

[Exeunt Valentine and Protheus.

2016 and vla ei eidT

SCENE

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218

<<^ * Laun. I am but a fool, look you, and yet I "have the wit to think my mafter is a kind of a "knave: but that's all one, if he be but one kind. "He lives not now that knows me to be in love, yet "I am in love; but a team of horfe fhall not pluck "that from me, nor who 'tis I love, and yet tis a "woman; but what woman I will not tell myself, "and yet 'tis a milk-maid; yet 'tis not a maid, for "the hath had goffips; yet 'tis a maid, for the " is her master's maid, and ferves for wages: The "hath more qualities than a water-fpaniel, which is "much in a bare chriftian. Here is the cat-log "[Pulling out a paper] of her conditions; Imprimis, "the can fetch and carry; why, a horfe can do no "more nay, a horfe cannot fetch, but only carry ; "therefore the is better than a jade. Item, the can "milk; look you, a fweet virtue in a maid with "clean hands.

Enter Speed.

Speed. How now, fignior Launce? what news with your mastership?

4 Laun. With my mafter's fhip? why, it is at sea.

3 Laun. I am but a fool, look you, and yet I have the wit to think my mafter is a kind of knave: but that's all one, if he be but one KNAVE.] Where is the fenfe, or, if you won't allow the Speaker that, where is the humour of this fpeech? Nothing had given the fool occafion to fufpect that his master was become double, like Antipholis in the Comedy of Errors. The laft word is corrupt. We fhould read,

if be b be but one KIND.

He thought his master was a kind of knave; however, he keeps himself in countenance with this reflexion, that if he was a knave but of one kind, he might pafs well enough amongft his neighbours. This is truly humourous.

4 With my mafter's fhip] This pun restored by Mr. Theobald. Speed.

Speed. Well, your old vice ftill; mistake the word: what news then in your paper is ga stol ngle I

Laun. The
Laun. The blackeft news that ever thou heard'ft.
Speed. Why, man, how black?

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Laun. Why, as black as ink.aly
Speed. Let me read them.

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Laun. Fie on thee, jolt-head, thou can't not read,
Speed Thou lyeft, I can.

Laun. I will try thee; tell me this, who begot thee?
Speed. Marry, the fon of my grand-father.

Laun. O illiterate loiterer, it was the font of thy grand-mother; this proves, that thou canst not read, 1 Speed Come, fool, come, try me in thy paper. Laun. There, and 5 St. Nicholas be thy speed!: Speed Imprimis, fhe can milk.

Laun. Ay, that the can.

Speed Item, the brews good ale.

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Laun. And thereof comes the proverb, Bleffing of

your heart, you brew good ale.

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Speed. Item, the can fowe.

Laun. That's as much as to fay, Can fhe fo?

Speed. Item, fhe can knit.

Laun. What need a man care for a stock with a wench, when the can knit him a ftock!...

Speed Item, fhe can wash and fcour.

Laun. A fpecial virtue, for then fhe need not to be wafh'd and fcour'd.

Speed. Item, the can fpin.

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Laun. Then may I fet the world on wheels, when the can fpin for her living.

Speed. Item, he hath many nameless virtues. Laun. That's as much as to fay, Baftard Virtues; that, indeed, know not their fathers, and therefore have no names. pile and fl'I; 912d qu?" (Aug.1

58 Nicholas be thy speed. St. Nicholas prefided over SA Scholars, who were therefore called St. Nicholas's Clerks. Hence, by a quibble between Nicholas and Old Nick Highwarmen, in the first part of Henry the fourth, are called Nicholas's Clerks.

Speed

Speed. Here follow her vices, y BW Nath Laun. Clofe at the heels of her virtues.Wonket Speed: Tem, fhe is not to be kift fafting, in refpect of her breath.

Laun. Well, that fault may be mended with a breakfaft: read on.

Speed. Item, the hath a sweet mouth.

Laun. That makes amends for her four breath.
Speed Item, the doth talk in her fleep.

Laun. It's no matter for that, fo fhe fleep not in yher talk,

Speed. Item, fhe is flow in words.

Laun. O villain! that fet down among her vices ! to be flow in words is a woman's only virtue: I pray thee, out with't, and place it for her chief virtue. Speed. Item, fhe is proud.

Laun. Out with that too: it was Eve's legacy, and cannot be ta'en from her.

Speed. Item, the hath no teeth.

Laun. I care not for that neither, becaufe I love crufts, so 2

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Speed. Item, fhe is curft.

doneLaun! Well, the beft is, the hath no teeth to bite. Speed. Item. fhe will often praife her liquor. Laun. If her liquor be good, fhe fhall if the will not, I will; for good things fhould be praised. Speed. Item, fhe is too liberal.

Laun. Of her tongue fhe cannot, for that's writ down, the's flow of; of her purfe fhe fhall not, for that I'll keep fhut; now of another thing the may, and that cannot I help. Well, proceed,

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Speed Item, fhe hath more hairs than wit, and more faults than hairs, and more wealth than faults. Laun," Stop here; I'll have her; fhe was mine, and not mine, twice or thrice in that article. Rehearfe that once moreen and en

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Speed. Item, the hath more hair than wit.

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