Enter Sir John Falstaff, Bardolph, Nym and Pistol. Fal. Now, mafter Shallow, you'll complain of me to the Council? Shal. Knight, you have beaten my men, kill'd my deer, and broke open my lodge. Fal. But not kifs'd your keeper's daughter. Fal. I will anfwer it ftrait: I have done all this. That is now answer'd, ` Shal. The Council fhall know this. Fal. 'Twere better for you, if 'twere not known in Council; you'll be laugh'd at. Eva. Pauca verba, Sir John, good worts. Fal. Good worts? good cabbage. Slender, I broke your head; what matter have you against me? Slen. Marry, Sir, I have matter in my head against you, and against your cony-catching-rafcals Bardolph, Nym, and Pistol. Bar. You Banbury cheese! Slen, Ay, it is no matter. Pift. How now, Mephoftophilus ? Slen. Ay, it is no matter. Nym. Slice, I fay; pauca, pauca: flice, that's my humour. Slen. Where's Simple, my man? can you tell, coufin? Eva. Peace: I pray you: now let us understand; there is three umpires in this matter, as I understand; that is, mafter Page; fidelicet, master Page; and there is my felf; fidelicet, my felf; and the three party is, laftly and finally, mine Hoft of the Garter. Pag. We three to hear it, and end it between them. Eva. Ferry goot; I will make a prief of it in my note-book, and we will afterwards ork upon the caufe with as great difcreetly as we can. Fal. Fal. Piftol. Pift. He hears with ears. Eva. The tevil and his tam! what phrafe is this," he hears with ear? why, it is affectations. Fal. Piftol, did you pick mafter Slender's purfe? Slen. Ay, by these gloves, did he; (or I would I might never come in mine own great chamber again elfe,) of feven groats in mill-fixpences, and two Edward fhovel-boards, that coft me two fhilling and two pence a-piece of Yead Miller, by these gloves. Fal. Is this true, Pistol? "Eva. No, it is falfe, if it is a pick-purse. Pift. Ha, thou mountain-foreigner! and mafter mine. 3 I Combat challenge of this latten bilboe: Sir John, Word of denial; froth and fcum, thou ly'ft. "Slen. By thefe gloves, then 'twas he. Nym. Be advis'd, Sir, and pass good humours: I will fay marry trap with you, if you run the base humour on me; that is the very note of it. Slen. By this hat then, he in the red face had it; for tho' I cannot remember what I did when you made me drunk, yet I am not altogether an ass. Fal. What fay you, Scarlet and John? Bard. Why, Sir, for my part, I fay, the gentleman had drunk himself out of his five fentences. Eva. It is his five fenfes: fie, what the Ignorance is! Bard. And being fap, Sir, was, as they fay, cafhier'd; and fo conclufions paft the car-eires. 3 latin bilboe:] Vulg. old Quarto, 1619, latten, which is right. Latten is tinned plates beaten out very thin. 4 Scarlet and John?] The names of two of Robin Hood's companions but the humour confifts in the allufion to Bardolph's red face; concerning which fee the fecond part of Henry the fourth. Slen. Slen. Ay, you spake in Latin then too; but 'tis no matter; I'll never be drunk whilft I live again, but in honest, civil, godly company, for this trick: if I be drunk, I'll be drunk with thofe that have the fear of God, and not with drunken knaves. Eva. So Got udg me, that is a virtuous mind. Fal. You hear all these matters deny'd, gentlemen; you hear it. Enter Mrs. Anne Page, with wine. Page. Nay, daughter, carry the wine in; we'll drink within. [Exit Anne Page. Slen. Oh heav'n! this is mistress Anne Page. Enter Miftrefs Ford and Mistress Page. Page. How now, mistress Ford? Fal. Miftrefs Ford, by my troth, you are very well met; by your leave, good mistress. [Kiffing ber. Page. Wife, bid these gentlemen welcome: come, we have a hot venifon pafty to dinner; come, gentlemen; I hope, we fhall drink down all unkindnefs. [Exeunt Fal. Page, &c. SCENE IV. Manent Shallow, Evans, and Slender. Slen. I had rather than forty fhillings, I had my book of fongs and fonnets here. Enter Simple. How now, Simple, where have you been? I must wait on my self, muft I? you have not the book of riddles about you, have you? Simp. Book of riddles! why, did you not lend it to Alice Shortcake upon All-ballowmas laft, a fortnight afore Michaelmas. VOL. I. S Shal. Shal. Come, coz; come, coz; we stay for you: a word with you, coz : marry this, coz: there is, as.. 'twere, a tender, a kind of tender, made afar off by Sir Hugh here; do you understand me? Slen. Ay, Sir, you fhall find me reasonable: if it be fo, I fhall do that that is reason. Shal. Nay, but understand me. Slen. So I do, Sir. Eva. Give ear to his motions, Mr. Slender: I will defcription the matter to you, if you be capacity of it. Slen. Nay, I will do, as my coufin Shallow fays: I pray you, pardon me, he's a Justice of peace in his country, fimple tho' I stand here. Eva. But that is not the queftion; the question is concerning your marriage. Shal. Ay, there's the point, Sir. Eva. Marry, is it; the very point of it, to Mrs. Anne Page. Slen. Why, if it be fo, I will marry her upon any reasonable demands. Eva. But can you affection the 'oman? let us command to know that of your mouth, or of your lips; for divers philofophers hold, that the lips is parcel of the mind: therefore precifely, can you carry your good Will to the maid? Shal. Coufin Abraham Slender, can you love her? Slen. I hope, Sir, I will do, as it fhall become one that would do reafon. Eva. Nay, Got's lords and his ladies, you must fpeak poffitable, if you can carry her your defires towards her. Shal. That you muft; will you, upon good dowry, marry her? Slen. I will do a greater thing than that upon your request, coufin, in any reason. Shal. Shal. Nay, conceive me, conceive me, fweet coz: what I do, is to pleasure you, coz; can you love the maid? Slen. I will marry her, Sir, at your requeft: but if there be no great love in the beginning, yet heav'n may decrease it upon better acquaintance, when we are marry'd, and have more occafion to know one another I hope, upon familiarity will grow more contempt: but if you fay, marry her, I will marry her, that I am freely diffolved, and diffolutely. Eva. It is a ferry discretion anfwer, fave, the faul is in th'ort diffolutely: the ort is, according to our meaning, refolutely; his meaning is good. Shal. Ay, I think, my coufin meant well. Shal. Here comes fair mistress Anne: 'would I were young for your fake, mistress Anne! Anne. The dinner is on the table; my father defires your worship's company. Shal. I will wait on him, fair mistress Anne. Eva. Od's pleffed will, I will not be abfence at the Grace. [Exeunt Shallow and Evans. Anne. Will't pleafe your worship to come in, Sir? Slen. No, I thank you, forfooth, heartily; I am very well. Anne. The dinner attends you, Sir. Slen. I am not a-hungry, I thank you, forfooth. Go, Sirrah, for all you are my man, go wait upon my coufin Shallow: [Exit Simple.] A Juftice of peace fometime may be beholden to his friend for a man, 5 will grow more content:] A conundrum reftored by Mr. Theobald, |