THE old English plainnefs and fincerity, that generous integrity of nature, and honefty of difpofition, which always argues true greatnefs of mind, and is u⚫ fually accompanied with undaunted courage and refolution, is in a great measure loft among us.

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THE dialect of converfation is now-a-days fo fwelled ⚫ with vanity and compliment, and fo furfeited (as I may fay) of expreffions of kindness and refpect, that if a man ⚫ that lived an age or two ago should return into the world again, he would really want a dictionary to help him to understand his own language, and to know the true in⚫trinfic value of the phrafe in fashion; and would hardly, at first, believe at what a low rate the highest strains and expreffions of kindness imaginable do commonly pafs in current payment: and when he should come to understand it, it would be a great while before he could bring himself, with a good countenance and a good confcience, to converfe with men upon equal terms, and in their own way.'

I HAVE by me a letter which I look upon as a great curiofity, and which may serve as an exemplification to the foregoing paffage, cited out of this moft excellent prelate. It is faid to have been written in King Charles II's reign by the ambaffador of Bantam, a little after his arrival in England.

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• Mafter,

THE

HE people where I now am, have tongues further from their hearts than from London to Bantam, ⚫ and thou knoweft the inhabitants of one of these places 'do not know what is done in the other. They call thee and thy fubjects barbarians, because we fpeak what we mean; and account themselves a civilized people, because they speak one thing, and mean another: truth they call barbarity, and falfehood politenefs. Upon " my firft landing, one who was fent from the king of this place to meet me, told me, That he was extremely forry for the form I had met with just before my arrival. I was troubled to hear him grieve and afflict himfelf upon my account; but in less than a quarter of an hour he fmiled, and was as merry as if nothing had happened. Another who came with him, told me, by my interpreter,

interpreter, He should be glad to do me any fervice that lay in his power. Upon which I defired him to carry one ⚫ of my portmantuas for me; but instead of serving me according to his promife, he laughed, and bid another do it. I lodged, the first week, at the house of one who defired me to think myself at home, and to confider his houfe as my own. Accordingly I the next morning began 'to knock down one of the walls of it, in order to let in the fresh air, and had packed up fome of the household goods, of which I intended to have made thee a prefent; but ⚫ the falfe varlet no fooner faw me falling to work, but ⚫he fent word to defire me to give over, for that he would ' have no fuch doings in his house. I had not been long ' in this nation, before I was told by one, for whom I had ' asked a certain favour from the chief of the king's fervants, whom they here call the lord treasurer, that I had eternally obliged him. I was fo furprifed at this gratitude, that I could not forbear faying, What fervice is ⚫ there which one man can do for another, that can oblige ' him to all eternity! however, I only asked him for my reward, that he would lend me his eldest daughter during my ftay in this country; but I quickly found that • he was as treacherous as the rest of his countrymen.

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AT my firit going to court, one of the great men almoft put me out of countenance, by afking ten thousand pardons of me for only treading by accident upon my toe. They call this kind of lie a compliment; for when they are civil to a great man, they tell him untruths, for which thou wouldst order any of thy officers of state to receive a hundred blows upon his foot. I do not know 'how I fhall negotiate any thing with this people, fince there is fo little credit to be given to them. When I go to fee the king's fcribe, I am generally told that he is not at home, though perhaps I faw him go into his house almoft the very moment before. Thou wouldst fancy that the whole nation are phyficians, for the first queftion they always afk me, is, How I do: I have this question put to me above a hundred times a-day. Nay, they are not only thus inquifitive after my health, but wish it in a more folemn manner, with a full glass in their hands, every time I fit with them at table, though at the fame ⚫ time they would perfuade me to drink their liquors in fuch

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'fuch quantities as I have found by experience will make " me fick. They often pretend to pray for thy health alfo in the fame manner; but I have more reafon to ex'pect it from the goodness of thy conftitution, than the fincerity of their wishes. May thy flave efcape in fafety from 'this double-tongued race of men, and live to lay himself once more at thy feet in thy royal city of Bantam.'

No. 558.

Wednesday, June 23.

Qui fit, Macenas, ut nemo, quam fibi fortem
Seu ratio dederit, feu fors objecerit, illa
Contentus vivat: laudet diverfa fequentes?
fortunati mercatores, gravis annis
Miles ait, multo jam fractus membra labore!
Contra mercator, navim jactantibus auftris,
Militia eft potior. Quid enim? concurritur: hora
Momento cita mors venit, aut victoria læta.
Agricolam laudat juris legumque peritus,
Sub galli cantum confultor ubi oftia pulfat.
Ille, datis vadibus, qui rure extractus in urbem eft,
Solos felices viventes clamat in urbe.

Cætera de genere hoc (adeo funt multa) loquacem
Delafare valent Fabium. Ne te morer, audi
Que rem deducam. Siquis Deus, en ego, dicat,
Jam faciam quod vultis: eris tu, qui modo miles,
Mercator: tu confultus modo, rufticus. Hinc vos,
Vos binc mutatis difcedite partibus. Eja,
Quid ftatis? Nolint. Atque licet effe beatis.
Hor. fat. 1. 1. 1. v. 1.

Whence is't, Macenas, that fo few approve.
The ftate they're plac'd in, and incline to rove :
Whether against their will by fate impos'd,
Or by confent and prudent choice efpous'd?
Happy the merchant! the old foldier cries,
Broke with fatigues, and warlike enterprife.
The merchant, when the dreaded hurricane
Toffes his wealthy cargo on the main,
Applauds the wars and toils of a compaign:

There

There an engagement foon decides your doom,
Bravely to die, or come victorious home.
The lawyer vows, the farmer's life is beft,
When, at the dawn, the clients break his reft.
The farmer, having put in bail t' appear,
And forc'd to town, cries, they are happiest there:
With thousands more of this inconftant race,
Wou'd tire e'en Fabius to relate each cafe.
Not to detain you longer, pray attend
The iffue of all this; fhould Jove defcend,
And grant to ev'ry man his rafh demand,
To run his lengths with a neglectful hand;
First, grant the harafs'd warrior a release,
Bid him go trade, and try the faithless feas,
To purchafe treafure and declining cafe:
Next, call the pleader from his learned ftrife,
To the calm blefings of a country life;
And, with thefe feparate demands difmifs
Each fuppliant to enjoy the promis'd blifs ::
Don't you believe they'd run?

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Not one will move, Though proffer'd to be happy from above.

Horneck.

IT a were card into a public stock,

T is a celebrated thought of Socrates, that if all the

in order to be equally diftributed among the whole species, thofe who now think themselves the most unhappy, would prefer the fhare they are already poffeffed of, before that which would fall to them by fuch a divifion. Horace has carried this thought a great deal further in the motto of my paper, which implies, that the hardships or misfortunes we lie under, are more eafy to us than thofe of any other person would be, in cafe we could change conditions with him.

As I was ruminating on thefe two remarks, and feated in my elbow-chair, I infenfibly fell asleep; when on a fudden, methought, there was a proclamation made by Jupiter, that every mortal fhould bring in his griefs and calamities, and throw them together in a heap. There was a large plain appointed for this purpose. I took my ftand in the centre of it, and faw with a great deal of pleasure the whole human fpecies marching one after another, and throwing down their feveral loads, which immediately

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mediately grew into a prodigious mountain, that seemed to rife above the clouds.

THERE was a certain lady of a thin airy shape, who was very active in this folemnity. She carried a magnifying glafs in one of her hands, and was clothed in a loose flowing robe, embroidered with feveral figures of fiends and fpectres that discovered themselves in a thousand chimerical fhapes, as her garment hovered in the wind. There was fomething wild and distracted in her looks. Her name was FANCY. She led up every mortal to the appointed place, after having very officiously afflifted him in making up his pack, and laying it upon his fhoulders. My heart melted within me to see my fellow-creatures groaning under their refpective burdens, and to confider that prodigious bulk of human calamities which lay before me.

THERE were however feveral perfons who gave me great diverfion upon this occafion. I obferved one bringing in a fardel very carefully concealed under an old embroidered cloak, which, upon his throwing it into the heap, I difcovered to be Poverty. Another, after a great deal of puffing, threw down his luggage, which, upon examining, I found to be his wife.

THERE were multitudes of lovers faddled with very whimfical burdens compofed of darts and flames; but what was very odd, though they fighed as if their hearts would break under thefe bundles of calamities, they could not perfuade themselves to cast them into the heap, when they came up to it; but after a few faint efforts, fhook their heads and marched away, as heavy loaden as they came. I faw multitudes of old women throw down their wrinkles, and feveral young ones who stripped themselves of a tawny skin. There were very great heaps of red nofes, large lips, and rufty teeth. The truth of it is, I was furprised to fee the greatest part of the mountain made up of bodily deformities. Observing one advancing towards the heap, with a larger cargo than ordinary upon his back, I found, upon his near approach, that it was only a natural hump, which he difpofed of, with great joy of heart, among this collection of human miferies. There were likeways diftempers of all forts, though I could not but obferve, that there were many more ima