• Publick, and I would be at an annual Expence in Spies to obferve their Motions. Whenever I fhould be furprized with a Vifit, as I hate Drinking, I would be brisk in fwilling Bumpers, upon this Maxim, That it is better to trouble others with my Impertinence, than to be troubled my felf with theirs. The Neceffity of an Infirma( ry makes me refolve to fall into that Project; ⚫ and as we should be but Five, the Terrors of an ⚫ involuntary Separation, which our Number cannot fo well admit of, would make us exert our felves, in Oppofition to all the Particulars mentioned in your Inftitution of that equitable Con'finement. This my Way of Life, I know would fubject me to the Imputation of a morofe, covetous and fingular Fellow. These and all other hard Words, with all manner of infipid Jefts, • and all other Reproach, would be Matter of "Mirth to me and my Friends: Befides, I would de'ftroy the Application of the Epithets Morofe and

Covetous, by a yearly Relief of my undeservedly "neceffitous Neighbours, and by treating my Friends • and Domesticks with an Humanity that should • exprefs the Obligation to lie rather on my fide; and as for the Word Singular, I was always of Opinion every Man must be fo, to be what one would defire him.

Your very bumble Servant,

Mr. SPECTATOR,

AB

J. R.

BOUT two Years ago I was called upon 'by the younger Part of a Country Family, by my Mother's fide related to me, to vilit Mr. Campbell, the dumb Man; for they told me 'that that was chiefly what brought them to Town, having heard Wonders of him in Effex, I, who

" always

'always wanted Faith in Matters of that Kind, was not easily prevailed on to go; but left they 'fhould take it ill, I went with them; when, to my Surprize, Mr. Campbell related all their past Life, (in fhort, had he not been prevented, fuch a Difcovery would have come out, as would ⚫ have ruined the next Defign of their coming to Town, viz. buying Wedding-Clothes.) Our 'Names though he never heard of us before and we endeavoured to conceal-were as familiar to him as to our felves. To be fure, Mr. 'SPECTATOR, he is a very learned and wise Man. Being impatient to know my Fortune, having paid my Respects in a Family-Jacobus, he " told me (after his manner) among several other things, that in a Year and nine Months I should 'fall ill of a new Fever, be given over by my Phyficians, but fhould with much Difficulty recover: That the first time I took the Air after'wards, I fhould be addrefs'd to by a young Gen'tleman of a plentiful Fortune, good Senfe, and

a generous Spirit. Mr. SPECTATOR, he is 'the pureft Man in the World, for all he faid is 'come to pass, and I am the happiest She in Kent. 'I have been in queft of Mr. Campbell these three 'Months, and cannot find him out. Now hearing you are a dumb Man too, I thought you might correfpond, and be able to tell me fomething; for I think my felf highly oblig'd to make his Fortune, as he has mine. 'Tis very poffible your Worship, who has Spies all over this Town, " can inform me how to fend to him: If you can, 'I beseech you be as fpeedy as poffible, and you will highly oblige

Your conftant Reader and Admirer,

Dulcibella Thankley.

VOL. VII.

B

OR

ORDERED, That the Infpector I employ about Wonders, enquire at the Golden-Lion, oppofite to the Half-Moon Tavern in Drury-Lane, into the Merit of this filent Sage, and report accordingly.

N° 471;

Thursday, September 4.

Que res in fe neque Confilium neque Modum Habet ullum, eam confilio regere non potes.

T

Ter.

IT is an old Obfervation, which has been made of Politicians who would rather ingratiate themfelves with their Sovereign, than promote his real Service, that they accommodate their Counfels to his Inclinations, and advise him to fuch Actions only as his Heart is naturally fet upon. The Privy-Counsellor of one in Love muft obferve the fame Conduct, unless he would forfeit the Friendship of the Perfon who defires his Advice. I have known feveral odd Cafes of this Nature. Hipparchus was going to marry a common Woman, but being refolved to do nothing without the Advice of his Friend Philander, he confulted him upon the Occafion. Philander told him his Mind freely, and reprefented his Miftrefs to him in fuch ftrong Colours, that the next Morning he received a Challenge for his Pains, and before Twelve a Clock was run through the Body by the Man who had asked his Advice. Celia was more prudent on the like Occafion; the defired Leonilla to give her Opinion freely upon a young Fellow who made his Addreffes to her. Leonilla, to oblige her, told her with great Franknefs, that she looked upon him as one of the most worthless Celia, foreseeing what a Character she was to expect, begged her not to go on, for that she had been privately married to him above a Fortnight. The Truth of it is, a Woman seldom asks Advice before she

has

has bought her Wedding-Clothes. When the has made her own Choice, for Form's fake fhe fends a Conge d' elire to her Friends.

If we look into the fecret Springs and Motives that fet People at work on thefe Occafions, and put them upon asking Advice, which they never intend to take; I look upon it to be none of the leaft, that they are incapable of keeping a Secret which is fo very pleafing to them. A Girl longs to tell her Confident, that she hopes to be married in a little time, and, in order to talk of the pretty Fellow that dwells fo much in her Thoughts, asks her very gravely, what she would advife her to in a Cafe of fo much Difficulty. Why elfe fhould Meliffa, who had not a thoufand Pound in the World, go into every Quarter of the Town to ask her Acquaintance whether they would advife her to take Tom Townly, that made his Ad-. dreffes to her with an Estate of five thousand a Year? 'Tis very pleafant, on this Occafion, to hear the Lady propofe her Doubts, and to fee the Pains the is at to get over them.

I must not here omit a Practice that is in Ufe among the vainer Part of our own Sex, who will often ask a Friend's Advice, in relation to a Fortune whom they are never likely to come at. WILL. HONEYCOMB, who is now on the Verge of Threefcore, took me afide not long fince, and asked me in his most serious Look, whether I would advise, him to marry my Lady Betty Single, who, by the way, is one of the greatest Fortunes about Town. I ftared him full in the Face upon so strange a Queftion; upon which he immediately gave me an Inventory of her Jewels and Estate, adding that he was refolved to do nothing in a Matter of fuch Confequence without my Approbation. Finding he would have an Anfwer, I told him, if he could get the Lady's Confent, he had mine. This is a

B. 2

bout

No 475. bout the tenth Match which, to my Knowledge, WILL. has confulted his Friends upon, without ever opening his Mind to the Party her felf.

I have been engaged in this Subject by the following Letter, which comes to me from fome notable young Female Scribe, who, by the Contents of it, feems to have carried Matters fo far, that she is ripe for asking Advice; but as I would not lofe her Good-Will, nor forfeit the Reputation which I have with her for Wisdom, I fhall only communicate the Letter to the Publick, without returning any Answer to it.

Mr. SPECTATOR,

NOW, Sir, the Thing is this: Mr. shapely is 'the prettiest Gentleman about Town. He is very tall, but not too tall neither. He dances like an Angel. His Mouth is made I don't know how, but 'tis the prettiest that I ever faw in my Life. He is always laughing, for he has an in⚫ finite deal of Wit. If you did but fee how he 'rolls his Stockings! He has a thousand pretty < Fancies, and I am fure, if you faw him, you ⚫ would like him. He is a very good Scholar, and can talk Latin as fast as English. I wish you 'could but fee him dance. Now you must un⚫derstand poor Mr. Shapely has no Estate; but how can he help that, you know? And yet my Friends are fo unreasonable as to be always teazing me about him, because he has no Estate: 'but I am fure he has that that is better than an Eftate; for he is a Good-natured, Ingenious, Modeft, Civil, Tall, Well-bred, Handfome 'Man, and I am obliged to him for his Civilities " ever fince I faw him. I forgot to tell you that 'he has black Eyes, and looks upon me now and then as if he had Tears in them. And yet my • Friends are so unreasonable, that they would have

'me