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morrow, good sir Hugh. Keep a gamester
Slen. Ah, sweet Anne Page!
Shal. What! the sword and the word! you study them both, master parson?
Caius. Ay, dat is very good! excellent! Host. Peace, I say; hear mine host of the Garter, Am I politic? am I subtle? am I a Machiavel? Shall I lose my doctor? no; he gives me the potions, and the motions. Shall I lose my parson? my priest? my sir Hugh? no; he gives me the proverbs and the no-verbs. do-Give me thy hand, terrestrial; so :-Give me thy hand, celestial; so:-Boys of art, I have deceived you both; I have directed you to wrong places: your hearts are mighty, your skins are whole, and det burnt sack be the issue. —Come, lay their swords to pawn: Follow me, lad of peace; follow, follow, follow. Shal. Trust me, a mad host:-Follow, gen..
Page. And youthful still, in your doublet and hose, this raw rheumatic day?
Eva. There is reasons and causes for it. Page. We are come to you, to do a good office, master parson.
Eva. Fery well: What is it? Page. Yonder is a most reverend gentleman,tlemen, follow. who belike, having received wrong by some person, is at most odds with his own gravity. and patience, that ever you saw.
Slen. O, sweet Anne Page!
[Exeunt SHAL. SLEN. PAGE, and Host. Cuius. Ha! do I perceive dat?! have you up-make-a de sot* of us? ha, haf
Shal. I have lived fourscore years and ward; I never heard a inan of his place, gravity, and learning, so wide of his own respect. Eva. What is he?
Page. I think you know him; master doctor Caius, the renowned French physician. Eva. Got's will, and his passion of my heart! I had as lief you would tell me of a mess of porridge. Model Page. Why?
Eva. He has no more knowledge in Hibo crates and Galen,—and he is a knave besides; a cowardly knave, as you would desires to be acquainted withal.
Page. I warrant you, he's the man should fight with him.
Slen. O, sweet Anne Page! Shal. It appears so, by his weapons:-Keep them asunder;-here comes doctor Caius.
Eva. This is well; he has made us his vlouting-stogt.-I desire you, that we may be friends; and let us knog our prains together, to be revenge on this same scall, scurvy, cogging companion, the host of the Garter.
Caius. By gar, vit all my beart; he promise to bring me vere is Anne Page: by gar, be deceive me tooth teeny, vid Eva. Well, I will smite his noddles :-Pray you, follow...B Live [Exeunt SCENE II. The Street in Windsor.
Enter Mrs. PAGE and ROBIN.
Mrs. Page. Nay, keep your way, little gal lant; you were wont to be a follower, but now you are a leader: Whether had you rather, lead mine eyes, or eye your master's heels?
Rob, I had rather; forsooth, go before you like a man, than follow him like a dwarfed Mrs. Page. O you are a flattening boy; now, I see, you'll be a courtier...6 plant vottar 3! "Enter FORD. Ford. Well met, mistress Page: Whither go you?
Enter Host, Carts, and RUGBY." Page. Nay, good master parson, keep in your weapon. Titzing, roub-2'-g Shal. So do you, good master doctor-o'k Host. Disarm them, and let them question; let them keep their limbs whole, and hack our English. Caius. I pray you, let-a me speak a word vit your ear: Verefore vill you not meet a-meg Eva. Pray you, use your patience: In good time.
Caius. By gar, you are de coward, de Jack dog, John ape.. Eva. Pray you, let us not be laughing-stogs to other men's humours; I desire you in friendship, and I will one way or other make you amends: I will knog your urinals about your kaave's cogscomb, for missing your meetings and appointments,
Catus. Diable!-Jack Rugby,mine Host de Jarterre, have I not stay for him, to kill him? have I not, at de place I did appoint?.
Mrs. Page. Truly, sir, to see your wife: Is she at home?
Ford. Ay, and as idle as she may hang together, for want of company: I think, if your husbands were dead, you two would marry. Mrs. Page. Be sure of that, two other husbands. Ford. Where had you this pretty weather. cock and
Mrs. Page. I cannot tell what the dickens his name is my husband had him of: What do you call your knight's name, sirrah ? orten On Rob. Sir John Falstaff.
Ford. Sir John Falstaff! ..
Mrs. Page. He, he; I can never hit on's name. There is such a league between my good man and he!-Is your wife at home, indeed?
Eva. As I am a christians soul, now, look you, this is the place appointed; I'll be judg-Ford. Indeed, she is. ment by mine host of the Garter, W
Ms. Page. By your leave, sir; I am sick, Host. Peace, I say, Guallia and Gaul, French till I see her. [Exeunt Mrs. PAGE und ROBING and Welsh; soul-curer and body-curer.
Ford. Has Page any brains? hath he any an os ad to 0% 19.1890s Irda + „a olaq? Flouting. stock.a guro y AP
[Exit Host. Ford. [Aside. I think, 1 shalt drink in pipewine first with him; I'll make him dance. Will you go, gentles?I All. Have with you, to see this monster. [Exeunt.
A Room in Ford's House.
Enter Mrs. FORD and Mrs. PAGE.
Mrs. Page. Quickly, quickly: Is the back.
Mrs. Ford. I warrant: What, Robin, I say.
eyes? hath he any thinking? Sure, they sleep; Host. Farewell, my hearts: I will to my he hath no use of them. Why, this boy will honest knight Falstaff, and drink canary_with carry a letter twenty miles, as easy as a cannon will shoot point-blank twelve score. He pieces out his wife's inclination; he gives her folly motion and advantage: and now she's going to my wife, and Falstaff's boy with her. A man may hear this shower sing in the wind! -and Falstaff's boy with her!-Good plots! they are laid; and our revolted wives share damnation together. Well; I will take him, then torture my wife, pluck the borrowed veil of modesty from the so seeming*, mistress be Mrs. Ford. What, John! what, Robert! Page, divulge Page himself for a secure and wilful Actæon; and to these violent proceed-basketings all my neighbours shall cry aimt. [Clock strikes.] The clock gives me my cue, and my assurance bids me search; there I shall find Falstaff: I shall be rather praised for this, than mocked; for it is as positive as the earth is firm, that Falstaff is there: I will go.. Enter PAGE, SHAllow, Slender, Host, Sir HUGH EVANS, CAIUS, and RUGBY.. Shal. Page, &c. Well met, master Ford. Ford. Trust me, a good knot: I have good cheer at home; and, I pray you, all go with me. Shal. I must excuse myself, master Ford. Slen. And so must I, sir; we have appointed to dine with mistress Anne, and I would not break with her for more money than I'll speak of.
Shat. We have lingered abont a match between Anne Page and my cousin Slender, and this day we shall have our answer.
Slen. I hope, bhave your good-will, father Page.
Page. You have, master Slender; I stand wholly for you:-but my wife, master doctor, is for you altogether. O
Caius. Ay, by gar; and de maid is love-a me; my nursh-a Quickly tell me so mush.
Enter Servants with a basket.
Mrs. Ford. Marry, as I told you before, John, and Robert, be ready here hard by in the brewhouse; and when I suddenly call you, come forth, and (without any pause, or staggering,) take this basket on your shoulders: that done, trudge with it in all haste, and carry it among the whitsters in Datchet mead, and there empty it in the muddy ditch, close by the Thames' side.
Mrs. Page. You will do it? q
Mrs. Ford. I have told them over and over; they lack no direction: Be gone, and come when you are called. [Exeunt Servants. Mrs. Page. Here comes little Robin.
Mrs. Ford. How now, my eyas-musket ¶? what news with you?
Rob. My master sir John is come in at your back-door, mistress Ford; and requests your 5oper for
Rob. Ay, I'll be sworn: My master knows not of your being here; and hath threatened to put me into everlasting liberty, if I tell you of it; for, he swears, he'll turn me away.
Host. What say you to young master Fenton? he capers, he dances, he has eyes of youth, Mrs Page. You little Jack-a-Lent**, have he writes verses, he speaks holyday, he smells you been true to us? April and May: he will carry't, he will carry't; 'tis in his buttons; he will carry't. 1. i 9 > Page. Not by my consent, I promise you. The gentleman is of no having: he kept company with the wild Prince and Poins; he is of too high a region, he knows too much. No, he shall not knit a knot in his fortunes. with the finger of my substance: if he take hér, let him take her simply; the wealth I have waits on my consent, and my consent goes not that way.
Mrs. Page. Thou'rt a good boy; this secrecy of thine shall be a tailor to thee, and shall make thee a new doublet and hose. F'll go hide me.
Ford. 'I beseech you, heartily, some of you go home with me to dinner: besides your cheer, you shall have sport; I will shew you a mon-it, ster. Master doctor, you shall go;-so shall you, master Page; and you, sir Hugh.
Shal. Well, fare you well-we sliall have the freer wooing at master Page's.
[Exeunt SHALLOW and SLENDER. Caius. Go home, John Rugby; I come
Fal. Have I caught thee, my heavenly [Exit RUGBY. jewel? Why, now let me die, for I have lived
• Specious. + Shall encourage. A young small hawk.
long enough; this is the period of my ambition: O. this blessed hour!
Mrs. Ford. O sweet sir John!
Fal. Mistress Ford, I cannot cog, I cannot prate, mistress Ford. Now shall I sin in my wish I would thy husband were dead: I'll speak it before the best lord, I would make thee my lady. Ther Mrs. Ford. should be a pitiful lady. Fal. Let the court of France shew me such another; I see how thine eye would emulate the diamond: Thou hast the right arched bent of the brow, that becomes the ship-tire, the tirevaliant, or any tire of Venetian admittance*, Mrs. Ford. A plain kerchief, sir John: my brows become nothing else; nor that well neither.
your lady, sir John! alas, I
Fal. Thou art a traitor to say so: thon would'st make an absolute courtier; and the firm of thy foot would excellent
Mrs. Page. What cause of suspicion!-Out upon you! how am I mistook in you? Mrs. Ford. Why, alas! what's the matter? Mrs. Page. Your husband's coming hither, woman, with all the officers in Windsor, to search for a gentleman, that, he says, is here now in the house, by your consent, to take an ill advantage of his absence: You are undone. Mrs. Ford. Speak louder. [Aside]Tis I hope
Mrs. Page, Pray heaven it be not so, that you have such a man here; but 'tis most certain your husband's coming with half Windsor at his heels, to search for such a one. I come before to tell you. If you know yourself clear, why I am glad of it: but if you have a friend here, convey, convey him out. Be not amazed; call all your senses to you; defend your repu tation, or bid farewell to your good life for ever."
motion to thy gait, in a semi-circled farthingale gentlemaFord, What shall I do ?-There is a
I see what thou wert, if fortune thy foe were not; nature is thy friend: Come, thou canst not hide it. quid om Hou Mrs. Ford. Believe me, there's no such thing in me.
Fal. What made me love thee? let that persuade thee, there's something extraordinary in thee. Come, I cannot cog, and say, thou art this and that, like a many of these lisping haw-thorn buds, that, come like women in men's apparel, and smell like Bucklers-bury + in simple-time; I cannot; but I love thee; none but thee; and thou deservest it.
Mrs. Ford. Do not betray me, sir; I fear, you love mistress Page, ven
Fal. Thou might'st as well say, I love to walk by the Counter-gate; which is as hateful to me as the reek of a lime-kiln. /
Mrs. Ford. Well, heaven knows, how I love you; and you shall one day find it. Fal. Keep in that mind; Pll deserve it.
my dear friend and I fear not mine own shame so much as his peril: I had rather than a thousand pound, he were out of the house.
Mrs. Page. For shame, never stand you had rather, and you had rather; your hus band's here at hand, bethink you of some conveyance: in the house you cannot hide him. O, how have you deceived me!-Look, here, is a basket; if he be of any reasonable stature, he may creep in here; and throw foul linen, upon him, as if it were going to bucking: Or, it is whiting-time T, send him by your two men to Datchet mead.
Mrs. Ford. He's too big to go in there: What shall I do? om od To Be by n
Fal. Let me see't, let me see't! O let me see't! I'll in, I'll in; follow your fri friend's counsel;-I'll in. Mrs. Page. What! sir John Falstaff! Are
Mrs. Ford. Nay, I must tell you, so you these your letters, knight but thee; help
do; or else I could not be in that mind.
Rob. [within.] Mistress Ford, mistress Ford! here's mistress Page at the door, sweating, and blowing, and looking wildly, and would needs speak with you presently..
Fal. I love thee, and none
me away: let me creep in here; I'll neverTHe goes into the basket i they hey cover him Mrs. Page, Help to cover your master,, boy: Call your men, mistress Ford:-You
Fal. She shall not see me; I will ensconce§ me behind the arras vn 1 abofly inakdissembling knight! Mrs. Ford. Pray you, do so; she's a very tattling woman. [FALSTAFF hides himself.
Enter Mrs. PAGE and ROBIN.
What's the matter? how now?, Mrs. Page. O mistress Ford, what have you done? You're shamed, you are overthrown, you are undone for ever.
Mrs. Ford. What's the matter, good mistress Page?
Mrs. Page, O. well-a-day, mistress Ford! having an honest man to your husband, to give him such cause of suspicion!
Mrs. Ford. What cause of suspicion?
Mrs. Ford. What, John, Robert, John! [Exit Robin; Re-enter Servants.] Go take up these clothes bere, quickly; Where's the cowl-staff **? look, how you drumblett: carry them to the laundress in Datchet mead; quickly, come, on jou hlon od telt to bu Enter FORD, PAGE, CAIUS, and Sir HUGH
Ford. Pray you, come near, if I suspect without cause, why then make sport at me, then let me be your jest; I deserve it,-How now? whither bear you this? Serv. To the laundress, f
• Venetian fashions. + Formerly chiefly nihabited by druggists. Prison. Hide.** Tapestry. ¶ Bleaching time. ** A staff for carrying, large tub or basket. # Drone.
Mrs. Ford. Why, what have you to do whither they bear it? You were best meddle' with buck-washing.
Ford. Buck? I would I could wash myself of the buck! Back, buck, buck?" Ay, buck; I warrant you, buck; and of the season too, it shall appear. [Exeunt Servants with the
basket.] Gentlemen, I have dreamed to-night;
Caius. By gar, nor I too; dere is no bodies. Page. Fie, fie, master Ford! are you not ashagination? I would not have your disspirit, devit suggests
I'H tell you my dream. Here, here, here be
Page, Good master Ford, be contented: you wrong yourself too much!
Ford. True, master Page -Up, gentlemen; you shall see sport anon: follow me, gentle[Exit. Eva. This is fery fantastical humours, and jealousies.
Cuius. By gar, 'tis no de fashion of France: it is not jealous in France.
Page. Nay, follow him, gentlemen; see the issue of his search.
[Exeunt EVANS, PAGE, and CAIUS. Mrs.Page. Is there not a double excellency in this?
Mrs. Ford. I know not which pleases me better, that my husband is deceived, or sir John.
Mrs.Page. What a taking was he in, when your husband asked whot was in the basket! Mrs. Ford. I am balf afraid he will have need of washing; so throwing him into the water will do him a benefit.
Mrs. Page. Hang him, dishonest rascal! I would, all of the same strain were in the same distress. !
Mrs. Ford, I think, my husband hath some special suspicion of Falstaff's being here; for never saw him so gross in his jealousy till
Ford. Ay, I do so.
temper in this kind, for the wealth of WindFord. 'Tis my fault, master Page: I suffer for it.
Eva. You suffer for a pad conscience: your wife is as honest a 'omans, as I will desires among five thousand, and five hundred too. Caius. By gar, I see 'tis an honest woman. Ford. Well;-I promised you a dinner: Come, come, walk in the park: I pray you, pardon me; I will hereafter make known to you, why I have done this.-Come, wife; come, mistress Page; I pray you, pardon me; pray heartily, pardon me.
Page. Let's go in, gentlemen; but, trust me, we'll mock him. I do invite you to-morrow morning to my house to breakfast; after, we'll a birding together; I have a fine hawk for the bush: Shall it be so?
Ford. Any thing.
Eva. If there is one, I shall make two in the company.
Caius. If there be one or two, I shall make a de turd. "
Eva. In your teeth: for shame. Ford. Pray you go, måster Page, Evd. I pray you now, remembrance tomorrow on the lousy knave, mine host. Caius. Dat is good; by gar, vit all my
heart. Eva. A lousy knave; to have his gîbės and his mockeries. DExeunt.
A Room in Page's House. * Enter FENTON, and Mistress Anne Page. Fent. I see, I cannot get thy father's love; Therefore, no more turn me to him, sweet Nan. Anne. Alas! how then?
Fent. Why, thou must be thyself. He doth object, I am too great of birth; And that, my state being galled with my ex'I seek to heal it only by his wealth: [pence, Besides these, other bars he lays before me,— My riots past, my wild societies; And tells me, 'tis a thing impossible I should love thee, but as a property. Anne. May be, he tells you true.. Fent. No, heaven so speed me in my time to come!
Albeit, 1 will confess, thy father's wealth
Mrs. Ford. Heaven make you better than Was the first motive that I woo'd thee, Anne :
your thoughts! Ford. Amen.
Yet, wooing thee, I found thee of more valne
Mrs. Puge. You do yourself mighty wrong, And 'tis the very riches of thyself"
Enter SHALLOW, SLENDER, and Mrs.
Shal. Break their talk, mistress Quickly; my kinsman shall speak for himself,
Sten. I'll make a shaft or a bolt on't*: slid, 'tis but venturing.
Shal. Be not dismay'd.
Slen. No, she shall not dismay me: I care not for that, but that I am afeard.
Quick. Hark ye; master Slender would speak a word with you.
Anne. I come to him.-This is my father's
Slen. Ay, that I will, come cut and long tailt, under the degree of a 'squire.
Shal. He will make you a hundred and fifty pounds jointure.
Anne. Good master Shallow, let him woo for himself.
Shal. Marry, I thank you for it; I thank you for that good comfort. She calls you, coz: I'll leave you.
Anne. Now, master Slender,
Slen. My will? od's heartlings, that's a pretty jest, indeed! I ne'er made my will yet, I thank heaven; I am not such a sickly creature, I give heaven praise.
Anne. I mean, master Slender, what would you with me?
Slen. Truly, for mine own part, I would little or nothing with you. Your father, and my uncle, have made motions: if it be my luck, so if not, happy man be his dole ! They can tell you how things go, better than I can: You may ask your father; here he
Enter PAGE, and Mistress PAGE. Page. Now, master Slender:-Love him, daughter Anne.
Why, how now! what does master Fenton
Page. She is no match for you.
Fent. Good mistress Page, for that I love
In such a righteous fashion as I do,
I must advance the colours of my love,
Mrs. Page. I mean it not; I seek you a
Quick. That's my master, master doctor. Anne. Alas, I had rather be set quick i' the earth,
And bowl'd to death with turnips.
I will not be your friend, nor enemy:
[Exeunt Mrs. PAGE and ANNE. Fent. Farewell, gentle mistress; farewell, Nan.
Quick. This is my doing now;-Nay, said I, will you cast away your child on a fool, and a physician? Look on, master Fenton:this is my doing.
Fent. I thank thee; and I pray thee, once
Give my sweet Nan this ring: There's for thy
Quick. Now heaven send thee good fortune!
A Room in the Garter Inn.
* A proverb-a shaft was a long arrow, and a bolt, a thick short one.