a long Series of Lovers, who followed the Widow Wild No. 561, fire to the 37th Year of her Age, at which time there Wednes ensued a Cessation of ten Years, when John Felt, Haber, day, dasher, took it in his Head to be in love with her, 1714, and it is thought will very suddenly carry her off, IX. The last is pretty Mrs. Runnet, who broke her first Husband's Heart before she was Sixteen, at which Time she was entred of the Club; but soon after left it, upon Account of a Second whom she made so quick a Dispatch of, that she returned to her Seat in less than a Twelvemonth. This young Matron is looked upon as the most rising Member of the Society, and will probably be in the President's Chair before she dies, These Ladies, upon their first Institution, resolved to give the Pictures of their deceased Husbands to the ClubRoom, but two of them bringing in their Dead at full Length, they covered all the Walls: Upon which they came to a second Resolution, that every Matron should give her own Picture, and set it round with her Husbands in Miniature, As they have most of them the Misfortune to be troubled with the Cholick, they have a noble Cellar of Cordials and strong Waters. When they grow Maudlin, they are very apt to commemorate their former Partners with a Tear, But ask them which of their Husbands they condole, they are not able to tell you, and discover plainly that they do not weep so much for the Loss of a Husband, as for the want of one, The principal Rule, by which the whole Society are to govern themselves, is this, To cry up the Pleasures of a single Life upon all Occasions, in order to deter the rest of their Sex from Marriage, and engross the whole Male World to themselves, They are obliged, when any one makes Love to a Member of the Society, to communicate his Name, at which time the whole Assembly sit upon his Reputa tion, Person, Fortune, and good Humour; and if they find him qualified for a Sister of the Club, they lay their Heads together how to make him sure, By this Means they are acquainted with all the Widow-hunters about Town, who often afford them great Diversion. There June 30, There is an honest Irish Gentleman, it seems, who knows nothing of this Society, but at different times has made Love to the whole Club, Their Conversation often turns upon their former Husbands, and it is very diverting to hear them relate their several Arts and Stratagems, with which they amused the Jealous, pacified the Cholerick, or wheedled the Good-natured Man, 'till at last, to use the Club Phrase, They sent him out of the House with his Heels foremost, The Politicks, which are most cultivated by this Society of She-Machiavils, relate chiefly to these two Points, How to treat a Lover, and How to manage a Husband, As for the first Set of Artifices, they are too numerous to come within the Compass of your Paper, and shall therefore be reserved for a second Letter, The Management of a Husband is built upon the following Doctrines, which are universally assented to by the whole Club. Not to give him his Head at first. Not to allow him too great Freedoms and Familiarities, Not to be treated by him like a raw Girl, but as a Woman that knows the World. Not to lessen any thing of her former Figure, To celebrate the Generosity, or any other Virtue, of a deceased Husband, which she would recommend to his Successor. To turn away all his old Friends and Servants, that she may have the dear Man to her self, To make him disinherit the undutiful Children of any former Wife. Never to be thoroughly convinced of his Affection, 'till he has made over to her all his Goods and Chattels, After so long a Letter, I am, without more Ceremony, No. 562, Friday, July 2, Praesens, absens ut sies.-Ter, T is a hard and nice Subject for a Man to speak of himself, says Cowley; it grates his own Heart to say any thing of Disparagement, and the Reader's Ears to hear any thing of Praise from him. Let the Tenour of of his Discourse be what it will upon this Subject, it No. 562. generally proceeds from Vanity, An ostentatious Man Friday, will rather relate a Blunder or an Absurdity he has July 2, committed, than be debarred from talking of his own dear Person, Some very great Writers have been guilty of this Fault. It is observed of Tully in particular, that his Works run very much in the First Person, and that he takes all Occasions of doing himself Justice. 'Does he think,' says Brutus, 'that his Consulship deserves more Applause than my putting Caesar to Death, because I am not perpetually talking of the Ides of March, as he is of the Nones of December?' I need not acquaint my learned Reader, that in the Ides of March Brutus de stroyed Caesar, and that Cicero quashed the Conspiracy of Cataline in the Calends of December. How shocking soever this great Man's talking of himself might have been to his Contemporaries, I must confess I am never better pleased than when he is on this Subject. Such Openings of the Heart give a Man a thorough Insight into his Personal Character, and illustrate several Passages in the History of his Life: Besides, that there is some little Pleasure in discovering the Infirmity of a great Man, and seeing how the Opinion he has of himself agrees with what the World entertains of him, The Gentlemen of Port Royal, who were more eminent for their Learning and their Humility than any other in France, banished the way of speaking in the First Person out of all their Works, as arising from Vain-Glory and Self-Conceit. To shew their particular Aversion to it, they branded this Form of Writing with the Name of an Egotism; a Figure not to be found among the ancient Rhetoricians, The most violent Egotism which I have met with in the Course of my Reading, is that of Cardinal Woolsey, Ego & Rex meus, I and my King; as perhaps the most eminent Egotist that ever appeared in the World, was Montagne the Author of the celebrated Essays. This lively old Gascon has woven all his bodily Infirmities into his Works, and after having spoken of the Faults or Virtues of any other Man, immediately publishes to 1714. the Friday, 1714. July 2, No. 562, the World how it stands with himself in that Particular. Had he kept his own Counsel he might have passed for a much better Man, tho' perhaps he would not have been so diverting an Author. The Title of an Essay promises perhaps a Discourse upon Virgil or Julius Cæsar; but when you look into it, you are sure to meet with more upon Monsieur Montagne than of either of them. The younger Scaliger, who seems to have been no great Friend to this Author, after having acquainted the World that his Father sold Herrings, adds these Words; La grande fadaise de Montagne, qui a écrit qu'il aimoit mieux le vin blanc--que diable a-t-on à faire de sçavoir ce qu'il aime? For my Part, says Montagne, I am a great Lover of your White Wines- What the Devil signifies it to the Publick, says Scaliger, whether he is a Lover of White Wines or of Red Wines ? I cannot here forbear mentioning a Tribe of Egotists for whom I have always had a mortal Aversion, I mean the Authors of Memoirs, who are never mentioned in any Works but their own, and who raise all their Pro ductions out of this single Figure of Speech, Most of our modern Prefaces savour very strongly of the Egotism. Every insignificant Author fancies it of Importance to the World, to know that he writ his Book in the Country, that he did it to pass away some of his idle Hours, that it was published at the Impor tunity of Friends, or that his natural Temper, Studies or Conversations, directed him to the Choice of his Subject, Id populus curat scilicet. Such Informations cannot but be highly improving to the In Works of Humour, especially when a Man writes under a fictitious Personage, the talking of one's self may give some Diversion to the Publick; but I would advise every other Writer never to speak of himself, unless there be something very considerable in his Character: Tho' I am sensible this Rule will be of little Use in the World, because there is no Man who fancies his Thoughts worth worth publishing, that does not look upon himself as a No. 562. considerable Person. I shall close this Paper with a Remark upon such as are Egotists in Conversation: These are generally the vain or shallow Part of Mankind, People being naturally full of themselves when they have nothing else in them. There is one kind of Egotists which is very common in the World, tho' I do not remember that any Writer has taken Notice of them; I mean those empty conceited Fellows, who repeat as Sayings of their own, or some of their particular Friends, several Jests which were made before they were born, and which every one who has conversed in the World has heard a hundred times over. A forward young Fellow of my Acquaintance was very guilty of this Absurdity: He would be always laying a new Scene for some old Piece of Wit, and telling us, That as he and Jack such-a-one were together, one or t'other of them had such a Conceit on such an Occasion; upon which he would laugh very heartily, and wonder the Com pany did not join with him. When his Mirth was over, I have often reprehended him out of Terence, Tuumne, obsecro te, hoc dictum erat? vetus credidi. But finding him still incorrigible, and having a Kindness for the young Coxcomb, who was otherwise a good-natured Fellow, I recommended to his Perusal the Oxford and Cambridge Jests, with several little Pieces of Pleasantry of the same Nature. Upon the reading of them, he was under no small Confusion to find that all his Jokes had passed through several Editions, and that what he thought was a new Conceit, and had appropriated to his own Use, had appeared in Print before he or his ingenious Friends were ever heard of. This had so good an Effect upon him, that he is content at present to pass for a Man of plain Sense in his ordinary Conversation, and is never facetious but when he knows his Company, Friday, July 2, 1714. Monday |