Lady F. You seem agitated. Sha'n't we bld our company adieu?

Court. No, no; there's no time for forms. I'll just give directions to the carriage, and be with you in a moment. (Going, steps back.) Put on your mask! I have a particular reason for it. [Exit.

Re-enter SAVILLE, with KITTY. Sav. Now, Kitty, you know your lesson. Lady Frances, (takes off his mask) let me lead you to your husband.

Lady F. Heavens! Is Mr. Saville the conjurer? Sir George is just stepped to the door to give directions. We are going home immediately. Sav. No, madam, you are deceived: Sir George is this way.

Lady F. This is astonishing!

Sav. Be not alarmed: you have escaped a snare, and shall be in safety in a moment.

[Exeunt Saville and Lady Frances.

Re-enter COURTALL, who seizes Kitty's hand.
Court. Now!

Kitty. 'Tis pity to go so soon. Court. Perhaps I may bring you back, my angel! but go now you must. [Exeunt Courtall and Kitty.

Music. Re-enter DORICOURT and LETITIA.

Doric. By heavens! I never was charmed till now. English beauty, French vivacity; wit, elegance. Your name, my angel! tell me your name, though you persist in concealing your face.

or

Let. My name has a spell in it.
Doric. I thought so; it must be charming.
Let. But if revealed, the charm is broken.
Doric. I'll answer for its force.

Let. Suppose it Harriet, or Charlotte, or Maria;

Doric. Hang Harriet, and Charlotte, and Maria! the name your father gave ye!

Let. That can't be worth knowing; 'tis so transient a thing.

Doric. How transient?

Let. Heaven forbid my name should be lasting till I am married!

Doric. Married! the chains of matrimony are too heavy and vulgar for such a spirit as your's. The flowery wreaths of Cupid are the only bands you should wear.

Let. They are the lightest, I believe; but 'tis possible to wear those of marriage gracefully. Throw them loosely round, and twist them in a true-lover's knot for the bosom.

Doric. An angel! But what will you be when a wife?

Let. A woman. If my husband should prove a churl, a fool, or a tyrant, I'd break his heart, ruin his fortune, elope with the first pretty fellow that asked me; and return the contempt of the world with scorn, whilst my feelings preyed upon my life.

Doric. Amazing! (Aside.) What if you loved him, and he were worthy of your love?

Let. Why, then, I'd be anything-and all! grave, gay, capricious; the soul of whim, the spirit of variety; live with him in the eye of fashion, or in the shade of retirement; ohange my country, my sex; feast with him in an Esquimaux hut, or a Persian pavilion; join him in the victorious war-dance on the borders of Lake Ontario, or sleep to the soft breathings of the flute in the cinnamon groves of Ceylon; dig with him in the mines of Golconda, or enter the dangerous precincts of the Mogul's seraglio; cheat him of his wishes, and overturn his empire, to restore the husband of my heart to the blessings of liberty and love.

Doric. Delightful wildness! Oh! to catch thee,

and hold thee for ever in this little cage! (Attempting to clasp her.)

Let. Hold, sir! Though Cupid must give the bait that tempts me to the snare, 'tis Hymen must spread the net to catch me.

Doric. "Tis in vain to assume airs of coldness; fate has ordained you mine.

Let. How do you know?

Doric. I feel it here. I never met with a woman so perfectly to my taste; and I won't believe it formed you so, on purpose to tantalise me.

Let. This moment is worth a whole existence! (Aside.)

Doric. Come, shew me your face, and rivet my chains.

Let. To-morrow you shall be satisfied.
Doric. To-morrow, and not to-night?
Let. No.

Doric. Where, then, shall I wait on you to-morrow? Where see you?

Let. You shall see me at an hour when you least expect me.

Doric. Why all this mystery?

Let. I like to be mysterious. At present be content to know, that I am a woman of family and fortune.

Doric. Let me see you to your carriage.

Let. As you value knowing me, stir not a step. If I am followed, you never see me more. Adieu. [Exil.

Enter HARDY.

Har. Adieu! then I'm come in at the fag end! (A side.)

Doric. Barbarous creature! she's gone! What, and is this really serious? Am I in love? Pho! it can't be.

Enter FLUTTER.

O, Flutter! do you know that charming creature? Flut. What charming creature? I passed a thousand.

Doric. She went out at that door, as you entered. Flut. Oh! yes; I know her very well. Doric. Do you, my dear fellow? who? Flut. She's kept by Lord George Jennet. Har. Impudent scoundrel! I foresee I shall cut his throat! (Aside.)

Doric. Kept!

Flut. Yes; Colonel Gorget had her first; then Mr. Loveill; then, I forget exactly how many; Masks.) and at last, she's Lord George's. (Talks to other

Doric. I'll murder Gorget, poison Lord George, and shoot myself.

Har. Now's the time, I see, to clear up the whole. Mr. Doricourt! I say, Flutter was mistaken; I know who you are in love with.

Doric. A strange rencontre! Who?
Har. My Letty.

Doric. Oh! I understand your rebuke; 'tis too soon, sir, to assume the father-in-law.

Har. Zounds! what do you mean by that? I tell you that the lady you admíre is Letitia Hardy.

Doric. I am glad you are so well satisfied with the state of my heart. I wish I was! [Exit. won't? very well; if I don't play you a trick for Har. Stop a moment. Stop, I say! What, you this, may I never be a grandfather! I'll plot with Letty now, and not against her; ay, hang me if I tingle in his heart. He shall have a lecture upon don't! There's something in my head, that shall impatience, that I foresee he'll be the better for as long as he lives.

Re-enter SAVILLE, with Gentlemen.

Sav. Flutter, come with us; we're going to raise a laugh at Courtall's.

Flut. With all my heart. "Live to live," was

my father's motto: "Live to laugh," is mine. [Music Exeunt.

SCENE II.-Courtall's.

Enter KITTY and COURTALL.

Kitty. Where have you brought me, Sir George? This is not our home!

Court. 'Tis my home, beautiful Lady Frances! (Kneels and takes off his mask.) Oh! forgive the ardency of my passion, which has compelled me to deceive you!

Kitty. Mr. Courtall! what will become of me? Court. Oh! say but that you pardon the wretch who adores you. Did you but know the agonizing tortures of my heart, since I had the felicity of conversing with you this morning; or the despair that now-Knocks, Courtall rises.) Kitty. Oh, I'm undone!

Court. Zounds! my dear Lady Frances, I am not at home! (Calls to a servant without.) Rascal! do you bear? Let nobody in; I am not at home! Serv. (Without.) Sir, I told the gentlemen so. Court. Eternal curses! they are coming up. Step into this room, adorable creature! one moment; I'll throw them out of the window, if they stay three. [Exit Kitty.

Enter SAVILLE, FLUTTER, and Gentlemen. Flut. O gemini! beg the petticoat's pardon. Just saw a corner of it.

1 Gent. No wonder admittance was so difficult. I thought you took us for bailiffs.

Court. Upon my soul, I am devilish glad to see you; but you perceive how I am circumstanced. Excuse me at this moment.

2 Gent. Tell us who 'tis then. Court. Oh, fie!

Flet. We won't blab.

Court. I can't, upon honour. Thus far-she's a Woman of the first character and rank. Saville, (laking him aside) have I influence, or have I not? Sar. Why, sure, you do not insinuate

Court. No, not insinuate, but swear, that she's now in my bed-chamber; by gad, I don't deceive you. There's generalship, you rogue! Such an humble, distant, sighing fellow as thou art, at the end of a six months' siege, would have boasted of a kiss from her glove. I only give the signal, and— pop! she's in my arms!

Sar. What, Lady Fran

Court, Hush! You shall see her name to-morrow morning in red letters at the end of my list. Gendemes, you must excuse me now. Come and drink chocolate at twelve; but

Sa. Ay, let us go, out of respect to the lady! 'Tis a person of rank.

Flat. Is it? Then I'll have a peep at her. (Rans to the door.)

Court. This is too much. (Trying to prevent him.) 1 Gent. By Jupiter, we'll have a peep!

Court. Gentlemen, consider-for heaven's sakea lady of quality. What will be the consequences? Flut. The consequences! Why, you'll have your throat ent, that's all; but I'll write your elegy: So, now for the door! (Part open the door, whilst the rest hold Courtall.) I beg your ladyship's pardon, whoever you are. (Leads her out.) Emerge from darkness, like the glorious sun, and bless the wondering circle with your charms. (Takes off her mask.)

Sav. Kitty Willis! Ha, ha, ha!

Omnes. Kitty Willis! Ha, ha, ha! Kitty Willis! 1 Gent. Why, what a fellow you are, Courtall, to attempt imposing on your friends in this manner! A lady of quality! An earl's daughter! Your adship's most obedient. Ha, ha, ha!

Sare. Courtall, have you Influence, or have you not?

Flut. The man's moon-struck.

Court. Hell and ten thousand furies seize you all together!

Kitty. What, me too, Mr. Courtall? me, whom you have knelt to, prayed to, and adored?

Flut. That's right, Kitty; give him a little more. Court. Disappointed and laughed at!

Sav. Laughed at and despised. I have fulfilled my design, which was to expose your villany, and laugh at your presumption. Adieu, sir; remember how you again boast of your influence amusement, dare not to look up to the virtuous with women of rank; and when you next want and to the noble for a companion. [Exit. Flut. And, Courtall, before you carry a lady into your bed-chamber again, look under her mask: d'ye hear? [Exit, leading Kitty. Court. There's no bearing this! I'll set off for [Exit.

Paris directly.

ACT V.

SCENE I.-Hardy's House.

Enter HARDY and VILLERS.

Vil. Whimsical enough! Dying for her, and hates her! Believes her a fool, and a woman of brilliant understanding!

Har. As true as you are alive, but when I went up to him, last night, at the Pantheon, out of downright good-nature, to explain things, my gentleman whips round upon his heel, and snapped one as short if I had been a beggar woman with six children, and he overseer of the parish.

Vil. Here comes the wonder-worker.

Let. Oh! no; but I am so enamoured of this all

conquering habit, that I could not resist putting it on the moment I had breakfasted. I shall wear it on the day I am married, and then lay it by in spices, like the miraculous robes of St. Bridget.

Vil. That's as most brides do. The charms that helped to catch the husband are generally laid by, one after another, till the lady grows a downright wife; and then runs crying to her mother, because she has transformed her lover into a downright husband.

Har. Listen to me. I ha'n't slept to-night for thinking of plots to plague Doricourt; and they drove one another out of my head so quick, that I was as giddy as a goose, and could make nothing something. of them. I wish to goodness you could contrive

Vil. Contrive to plague him? Nothing so easy. Don't undeceive him, madam, till he is your husband. Marry him whilst he possesses the sentiand when you are his wifements you laboured to give him of Miss Hardy;

Let. O, heavens! I see the whole; that's the very thing. My dear Mr. Villers, yon are the divinest man!

Vil. Don't make love to me, hussy.

Enter MRS. RACKET.

Mrs. R. No, pray don't; for I design to have Villers myself in about six years. There's an oddity in him that pleases me. He holds women in contempt; and I should like to have an opportunity of breaking his heart for that.

Vil. And when I am heartily tired of life, I know no woman whom I would with more pleasure make my executioner.

Har. It cannot be. I foresee it will be impossible to bring it about. You know the wedding wasn't to take place this week, or more; and Letty will never be able to play the fool so long.

Vil. The knot shall be tied to-night. I have it all here. (Pointing to his forehead.) The license is ready. Feign yourself ill; send for Doricourt, and tell him you can't go out of the world in peace, except you see the ceremony performed.

Har. I feign myself ill! I could as soon feign myself a Roman ambassador. I was never ill in my life, but with the tooth-ache: when Letty's mother was a breeding I had all the qualms.

Vil. Oh! I have no fear for you. But what says Miss Hardy? Are you willing to make the irrevocable vow before night?

Let. Oh, heavens! I-'Tis so exceeding sudden, that really

Mrs. R. That really she is frightened out of her wits, lest it should be impossible to bring matters about. But I have taken the scheme into my protection, and you shall be Mrs. Doricourt before night. Come, (to Hardy) to bed directly: your room shall be crammed with phials, and all the apparatus of death. Then, heigh, presto! for Dori

court.

Vil. You go and put off your conquering dress, (to Letitia) and get all your awkward airs ready: and you practise a few groans, (to Hardy) and you, if possible, an air of gravity. (To Mrs. Racket.) I'll answer for the plot.

Let. Married in jest! 'Tis an odd idea! Well, I'll venture it. [Exeunt Letitia and Mrs. Racket. Vil. Ay, I'll be sworn! (Looks at his watch.) 'Tis past three. The budget's to be opened this morning. I'll just step down to the house. Will you go?

Har. What! with a mortal sickness?

Vil. What a blockhead! I believe if half of us were to stay away with mortal sickness, it would be for the health of the nation. Good morning. I'll call and feel your pulse as I come back. [Exit. Har. You won't find them over brisk, I fancy. I foresee some ill happening from this making believe to die before one's time. But hang it ahem! I am a stout man yet; only fifty-six. What's that? In the last yearly bills there were three lived to above a hundred: Fifty-six! Fiddle-de-dee! I am not afraid, not I.

SCENE II.-Doricourt's Lodgings.

[Exit.

Doric. What sort of a creature is she?

Sav. Why, she spends him three thousand a year with the ease of a duchess, and entertains his friends with the grace of a Ninon. Ergo, she is handsome, spirited, and clever. (Doricourt walks about disordered.) In the name of caprice, what ails you?

Doric. You have hit it. Elle est mon caprice. The mistress of Lord George Jennett is my caprice. Oh, insufferable!

Sav. What, you saw her at the masquerade? Doric. Saw her, loved her, died for her-without knowing her; and now, the curse is, I can't hate her.

Sav. Ridiculous enough! All this disuss about a kept woman, whom any man may have, I dare swear, in a fortnight. They've been jarring some time.

Doric. Have her! The sentiment I have conceived for the witch is so unaccountable, that, in that line, I cannot bear her idea. Were she a woman of honour, for a wife, I could adore her; but I really believe, if she should send me an assignation, I should hate her.

Sav. Heyday! This sounds like love. What becomes of poor Miss Hardy?

Doric. Her name has given me an ague! Dear Saville, how shall I contrive to make old Hardy cancel the engagements! The moiety of the estate, which he will forfeit, shall be his the next moment by deed of gift.

Sav. Let me see: can't you get it insinuated that you are a devilish wild fellow; that you are an infidel, and attached to wenching, gaming, and so

forth?

Doric. Ay, such a character might have done some good two centuries back. But who the devil can it frighten now? I believe it must be the mad scheme at last. There, will that do for a grin? (Affects madness.)

Sav. Ridiculous! but how are you certain that the woman who has so bewildered you belongs to Lord George?

Doric. Flutter told me so.

Sav. Then fifty to one against the intelligence. Doric. It must be so. There was a mystery in her manner, for which nothing else can account. A violent rap.) Who can this be?

Sav. (Looks out.) The proverb is your answer; 'tis Flutter himself. Tip him a scene of the madman, and see how it takes.

Doric. I will; a good way to send it about town. Shall it be for the melancholy kind, or the raving? Sav. Rant! rant! Here he comes.

Doric. Talk not to me, who can pull comets by the beard, and overset an island!

Enter FLUTTER.

There! This is he! this is he who hath sent my poor soul, without coat or breeches, to be tossed about in æther like a duck-feather! Villain, give me my soul again! (Seizes him.)

Flut. Upon my soul! I hav'n't got it. (Exceedingly frightened.)

Sav. Oh! Mr. Flutter, what a melancholy sight! I little thought to have seen my poor friend reduced to this.

Flut. Mercy defend me! What, is he mad?

Sav. You see how it is. A cursed Italian ladyJealousy gave him a drug; and every full of the

moon

Doric. Moon! Who dares talk of the moon? The patroness of genius; the rectifier of wits; the-Oh! here she is! I feel her; she tugs at my brain. She has it! she has it! Oh! [Exit.

Flut. Well, this is dreadful! exceeding dreadful, I protest. Have you had Monro?

Sav. Not yet. The worthy Miss Hardy-what a misfortune!

Flut. Ay, very true. Do they know it? Sav. Oh, no! the paroxysm seized him but this morning.

Flut. Adieu; Ican't stay. (Going in great haste.) Sav. But you must stay, (holding him) and assist me; perhaps he'll return again in a moment; and when he is in this way, his strength is prodigious.

Flut. Can't, indeed; can't, upon my soul. (Going.) Sav. Flutter, don't make a mistake now; remember, 'tis Doricourt that's mad.

Flut. Yes-you mad. Sav. No, no; Doricourt.

Sir G. Seek him!

Ay.

Lady F. How did you get his name? I should never have told it you.

Sir G. I learned it in the first coffee-house I entered. Every body is full of the story.

Lady F. Thank heaven, he's gone! But I have a story for you: the Hardy family are forming a plot upon your friend Doricourt, and we are expected in the evening to assist.

Sir G. With all my heart, my angel! but I can't stay to hear it unfolded. They told me Mr. Saville would be at home in half an hour, and I am impatient to see him. The adventure of last nightLady F. Think of it only with gratitude. The danger I was in has overset a new system of condact, that perhaps I was too much inclined to adopt. But henceforward, my dear Sir George, you shall be my constant companion and protector; and when they ridicule the unfashionable monsters, the felicity of our hearts will make their satire pointless. Sir G. Charming angel! You almost reconcile me to Courtall. Hark! here's company. (Stepping to the door.) 'Tis your lively widow; I'll step down the back stairs to escape her. [Exit.

Enter MRS. RACKET.

Mrs. R. Oh, Lady Frances! I am shocked to death. Have you received a card from us? Lady F. Yes; within these twenty.minutes. Mrs. R. Ay, tis of no consequence. 'Tis all over-Doricourt's mad. Lady F. Mad!

Mrs. R. My poor Letitia! Just as we were enjoying ourselves with the prospect of a scheme that was planned for their mutual happiness, in_came Flutter, breathless, with the intelligence: I flew here to know if you had heard it.

Lady F. No, indeed; and I hope it is one of Mr. Flutter's dreams.

Enter SAVILle.

Mrs. R. Why so, sir?

Sav. 'Tis rather a delicate subject, but he did not love Miss Hardy.

Mrs. R. He did love Miss Hardy, sir; and would have been the happiest of men.

Sav. Pardon me, madam; his heart was not only free from that lady's chains, but absolutely captívated by another.

Mrs. R. No, sir; no. It was Miss Hardy who captivated him. She met him last night at the masquerade, and charmed him in disguise. He professed the most violent passion for her; and a plan was laid this evening to cheat him into happiness.

Sav. Ha, ha, ha! Upon my soul, I must beg your pardon! I have not eaten of the Italian princess's box of sweetmeats, sent by her own page; and yet I am as mad as Doricourt. Ha, ha, ha! Mrs. R. So it appears. What can all this mean? Sav. Why, madam, he is at present in his perfect senses; but he'll lose them in ten minutes through joy. The madness was only a feint, to avoid marrying Miss Hardy. Ha, ha, ha! I'll carry him the intelligence directly. (Going.)

Mrs. R. Not for worlds. I owe him revenge now for what he has made us suffer. You must promise not to divulge a syllable I have told you; and when Doricourt is summoned to Mr. Hardy's, prevail on him to come, madness and all.

Lady F. Pray do. I should like to see him shewing off, now I am in the secret.

Sav. You must be obeyed; though 'tis inhuman to conceal his happiness.

Mrs. R. I am going home; so I'll set you down at his lodgings, and acquaint you, by the way, with our whole scheme. Allons!

Sav. I attend you. (Leading her out.)
Mrs. R. You won't fail us?

[Exeunt Mr. Saville and Mrs. Racket.
[Exit.

Lady F. No; depend on us.

SCENE IV.-Doricourt's Lodgings.

DORICOURT seated, reading.

Doric. (Flings away the book.) What effect can the morals of fourscore have on a mind torn with

passion? (Musing.) Is it possible such a soul as her's can support itself in so humiliating a situation? A kept woman! (Rising.) Well, well; I am glad it is so! I am glad it is so!

Enter SAVILLE.

Sar. I should have been happy to have prevented Sir George. I hope your ladyship's adventure last Bight did not disturb your dreams?

Lady F. Not at all; for I never slept a moment. My escape, and the importance of my obligations to you, employed my thoughts. But we have just had shocking intelligence. Is it true that Doricourt is

mad?

Sav. So, the business is done. (Aside.) Madam, I am sorry to say, that I have just been a melancholy witness of his ravings; he was in the height of a paroxysm.

Mrs. R. Ob, there can be no doubt of it! Flutter told us the whole history. Some Italian princess gave him a drug, in a box of sweetmeats, sent to Sim by her own page; and it renders him lunatic every month. Poor Miss Hardy! I never felt so mach on any occasion in my life.

Sav. To soften your concern, I will inform you, adam, that Miss Hardy is less to be pitied than you imagine.

sooth, the whole female world is concerned for. I reported the state of your brain to five different women. The lip of the first trembled; the white bosom of the second heaved a sigh; the third ejaculated, and turned her eye to-the glass; the fourth blessed herself; and the fifth said, whilst she pinned a curl, "Well, now perhaps he'll be an amusing companion: his native dulness was intolerable."

Doric. Envy! sheer envy, by the smiles of Hebe! There are not less than forty pair of the brightest eyes in town will drop crystals, when they hear of my misfortune.

Sav. Well! but I have news for you. Poor Hardy is confined to his bed; they say he is going out of the world by the first post, and he wants to give you his blessing.

Doric. Ill! so ill! I am sorry from my soul. He's a worthy little fellow, if he had not the gift of foreseing so strongly.

Sav. Well, you must go and take leave.

Doric. What! to act the lunatic in the dying man's chamber.