Queen. Come ladies will you please to chuse | A grand triumph.—Enter CHRONON HOTONTHO your tea; Or green Imperial, or Pekoe Bohea? 1st. Lady. Never, no, never sure on earth LOGOS, guards and attendants, &c. met by COPHORNIO. Aldi. All hail to Chrononhotonthologos! 1st. Lady. We don't indeed: Your merit does our praise by far exceed. Queen. You make me blush: Pray, help me to a fan. 1st Lady. That blush becomes you.Tat. Would I were a man! airs. Queen. I'll hear no more of these fantastic [Bell rings. The bell rings in: Come ladies, let's to prayers. [They dance off. SCENE III.-An anti-chamber. Enter RIGDUM and ALDIBORONTI. Rig. Egad, we're in the wrong box! Who the devil would have thought that Chrononhotonthologos should be at that mortal sight of Tippodeans? Why there's not a mother's child of them to be seen! 'egad they footed it away as fast as their hands could carry them; but they have left their king behind them. We have him safe, that's one comfort. Aldi. Would he were still at amplest liberty! A solemn triumph graces his return. And read, in them, what tongue can never utter. Rig. Now my dear little Phorscophorny, for a Aldi. A sudden diarrhæa's rapid force King. Bid the physicians of the world assemble Tat. Can I guess what, unless you tell, my queen? Queen. The king, I mean? Tat. Just now returned from war, He rides like Mars in his triumphal car. Conquest precedes, with laurels in his hand; Behind him Fame does on her tripos stand; Her golden trump shrill through the air she sounds, Which rends the earth, and thence to Heaven rebounds; Trophies and spoils innumerable grace This triumph, which all triumphs does deface: Haste then, great queen! your hero thus to meet, Who longs to lay his laurels at your feet. Queen. Art mad, Tatlanthe? I meant no such thing. Your talk's distasteful. Tat. Didn't you name the king? Queen. I did, Tatlanthe, but it was not thine; The charming king I mean, is only mine. Tat. Who else, who else, but such a charming fair, In Chrononhotonthologos should share? While on the slaughtered heaps himself did rise, away. Queen. This does my utmost indignation raise: Do not, great queen, your anger thus display! Queen. No, find it out. Tat. No, I will never leave you here I'll grow, Till you some token of forgiveness show: Oh! all ye powers above, come down, come down! And froin her brow dispel that angry frown. Queen. Tatlanthe, rise; you have prevailed at last: Offend no more, and I'll excuse what's past. [TATLANTHE aside, rising. Tat. Why, what a fool was I, not to perceive her passion for the topsy-turvy king, the gentleman that carries his head where his heels should be? But I must tack about I see. [To the QUEEN. Excuse me, gracious madam! if my heart Bears sympathy with your's in every part; With you alike I sorrow and rejoice, Approve your passion, and commend your choice; The captive king Queen. That's he! that's he! that's be! I'd die ten thousand deaths to set him free: Oh! my Tatlanthe! have you seen his face, His air, his shape, his mein, his every grace? In what a charming attitude he stands! How prettily he foots it with his hands! Well, to his arms, no, to his legs, I fly, For I must have him, if I live or die. [Exeunt. SCENE II.A bed chamber. CHRONONHOTONTHOLOGOS asleep. Rough music, viz. Salt-boxes and rolling-pins; grid-irons and tongs; sow-gelders' horns, marrow-bones and cleavers, &c. &c. [He wakes. Chron. What heavenly sounds are these that charm my ears! Sure 'tis the music of the tuncful spheres. Enter Captain of the guards. Capt. A messenger from general Bombardi nian Command your freedom, by this sacred ring; SCENE IV.-BOMBARDINIAN'S tent. Then command me: What says my charming King and BOMBARDINIAN at a table, with two king? [She puts the ring in his mouth, he bends the sea-crab, and makes a roaring noise. Queen. What can this mean! he lays his feet at mine, Is this of love or hate his country's sign? Venus and Cupid descend in her chariot, and sing. AIR. Ven. See Venus does attend thee, With pity and compassion, My dilding, my dolding. She sees thy tender passion, Lilly, &c. da capo. AIR.-Changes, To thee I yield my power divine, Demand whate'er thou wilt, 'tis thine, Take this magic wand in hand, All the world's at thy command, ladies. Bom. This honour, royal sir, so royalizes The royalty of your most royal actions, The dumb can only utter forth your praise; For we, who speak, want words to tell our mearing. Two jolly young husbands your person shall share, And twenty fine babies all lovely and fair, Here! fill the goblet with Phalernian wine, And, while our monarch drinks, bid the shrill trumpet Tell all the gods, that we propine their healths. King. Hold, Bombardinian! I esteem it fit, With so much wine, to eat a little bit. Queen. O thanks, Mr. Cupid! for this your good news, Gilly flower, &c. What woman alive would such favours refuse ? While the dew, &c. Bom. See that the table instantly be spread, With all that art and nature can produce. Traverse from pole to pole; sail round the globe, Bring every eatable that can be eat; The king shall eat, though all mankind be starved. Cook. I am afraid his majesty will be starved, before I can run round the world for a dinner; besides, where's the money? [Venus and Cupid re-ascend; the Queen goes off, and the king of the Antipodes follows, walking on his hands. Guards, seize the villain! broil him, fry him, stew him; Ourselves shall eat him out of mere revenge. Cook. O, pray your majesty spare my life; there's some nice cold pork in the pantry: I'll hash it for your majesty in a minute. Chron. Be thou first hashed in hell, audacious slave! [Kills him, and turns to BOMBARDINIAN. Hashed pork! shall Chrononhotonthologos Be fed with swine's flesh, and at second-hand? Now, by the gods, thou dost insult us, general! Bom. The gods can witness, that I little thought Your majesty to other flesh than this [Points to the ladies. King. Is this a dinner for a hungry monarch? Bomb. Monarchs as great as ChrononhotonHave made a very hearty meal of worse. thologos, King. Ha! Traitor! dost thou brave me to my teeth? Ha! What have I done? Go, call a coach, and let a coach be called; And let the man that calls it be the caller; And, in his calling, let him nothing call, But coach! coach! coach! Oh! for a coach, ye gods! [Exit raving. Returns with a Doctor. Bom. How fares your majesty? Bom. Ha! dead! impossible! it cannot be! I would not believe it, though himself should swear it. Go, join his body to his soul again, Or, by this light, thy soul shall quit thy body! Doc. My lord, he's far beyond the power of physic: His soul has left his body, and this world. Bom. Then go to the other world and fetch it And, if I find thou trifles with me there, Enter QUEEN and others. Has left me so; is not that a wretched thing? Tat. Why, then, dear madam! make no farther pother, Were I your majesty, I would try another. Rig. Ay, that I can, and please your majesty. So, ceremonies apart, let us proceed to business. Queen. Oh! but the mourning takes up all easy, I'll have you both; and that, I hope will please ye. Make preparation for our wedding day. [Exeunt omnes. Dood. Oh, 'tis a day Of jubilee, cajollery; Their majesties may boast of it; Nood. Courtiers so gay, &c. While both she and Huncamunca tipple, talking Returns triumphant.-Captive giants swarm Like bees behind his car. Is grown bobbish and uxorious; tawdry; Even Mr. Sol, [Flourish of Trumpets. Nood. These trumpets speak the king at le |