the junto: their senses are bewildered; their precious lives are despaired of; and all their "impartial criticisms on themselves," long ere this, committed to the flames. I remain, Your well wisher, Covent Garden, Jan. 10, 1822. [We do not hold with all our correspondent's opinions, who is rather too "severe on stage-struck heroes," and should not have made his letter public, had we not received positive information from a most respectable quarter, confirming his assertions.] The Cuckold's Chronicle. THE TEMPLE CRIM. CON. THE private intelligence which we received last month, concerning this affair, was broken off at the part where his lordship sent the intrusive husband and shopman to the watch-house. Having dressed himself, he endeavoured to tranquillize the mind of the frail fair one, and prevailed upon her to remain in bed until his return. When he arrived at the watch-house, the husband and shopman were placed at the bar, before the constable of the night.. His lordship stated that he was proprietor of certain chambers in the Temple, and that the two fellows then at the bar, suddenly entered his bed-room window, and placed themselves in a threatening attitude; that being fortunately provided with fire-arms he succeeded in driving them out of the window, and the watchman took them on the roof of the house. Charley corroborated this evidence, and the prisoners were called on for their defence. The husband acknowledged that appearances were certainly, against him, but that a watch house was not a proper place for him to state who and what he was, and the justifiable motive which prompted his conduct. He declined saying any thing until he went before the magistrate in the morning, when he could have a private audience. The parties being thus secured, his lordship returned triumphant to his anxious inamorata, and entreated her to banish every care from her mind, and devote her whole soul to love during the night, as she should have nothing to regret, let the result be what it might. She was not, however, so easily calmed, for she sincerely loved her husband notwithstanding these occasional faux pas, and would not willingly have given him a moment's pain. Her temperament was warm, and although she had now and then transgressed the rule of right for the gratification of her passions, it had never interfered with the devotion of her heart towards her husband, and the father of her three children. Her feelings were most accute when she reflected what must be the anguish of her husband, who she knew adored her; and the idea of a separation from him was insupportable. This being her deplorable situation, it was not until his lordship had made her drink heartily of mulled wine, that he could prevail on her to repose herself until the morning, when he pledged himself he would effect an amicable arrangement. He rose early. and sent for his chaplain, a man of considerable experience in matters of gallantry, and of a ready wit in all emergencies. The Rev. Mr. T arrived at the chambers, and breakfasted with his lordship, and the disconsolate fair one, about nine o'clock. After every thing past had been minutely related, his lordship said, "Thus you see, my Reverend Joker, I am in a devil of a scrape, at least the poor woman is-you have often assisted me in these matters, and if you get us safe through this, you shall have the living of C, which is well stocked with game, you shall be dubbed D.D., and perhaps, I have interest sufficient to get you made a bishop before long." The chaplain immediately exclaimed, "I have it-I must be off directly-there is not a moment to lose in the mean time, let your lordship step to the magistrate, before whom these parties must appear, and assure him the matter was not so serious as you suspected; it was a mistake, and you consent to their discharge." "Whatever your reverence orders shall be done," said his lordship. The chaplain hastened immediately to the watch-house, and told the husband he would have no occasion to expose his name, trade, or residence, nor the affair of his wife to the magistrate, as he would be discharged the moment he appeared, without a question being asked; and begged, as he valued his future happiness, not to give vent to his just anger and indignation at the present moment, but be calm until after they should have had some further conversation in private at a tavern. He had some difficulty in getting the husband to listen to his proposals, and it was not until he used considerable address, that the poor cornuto's consent was obtained regarding the interview. The chaplain returned to his lordship, and told him that he had engaged two rooms at the Tavistock Hotel, and wished him and the lady to be in one of them during his (the chaplain's) interview with the husband. His lordship agreed, and left every thing to the management of his reverence, who concerted with the heart-broken fair-one, part of the plan of operations. No sooner had the husband and his shopman been discharged, than they met the chaplain at the appointed rendezvous. The chaplain requested that the shopman would withdraw for awhile, and solemnly exhorted him, if he would serve his own interest, not to give the slightest hint to any mortal of what had befallen his mistress. The moment the shopman was withdrawn, the chaplain addressed the unfortunate husband to the following effect:-"You are, no doubt, sir, contemplating in your own mind schemes of revenge-it is just and natural that you should-but however just and natural, and however gratifying to one's feelings certain modes of proceeding may be, we ought not on all occasions to Ram. Mag.-No. II. G exclude the suggestions of sound policy. In this country there is no punishment for adultery, except the fiction of modern lawyers, called an action for damages; wherein, if the husband can prove he actually sustained a loss, he obtains an amount according to his respectability and the responsibility of the adulterer. But these verdicts hinge upon a great variety of considerations. If the adulterer is a friend, and is guilty of a breach of confidence and hospitality-if he has pursued a long and artful course of seduction, and ultimately alienates the affections of the woman, thereby depriving the husband of the mistress of his house, the mother of his children, and what is the greatest and best gift of heaven, a good wife; in such cases, the damages are certain and proportionate. But if a man merely goes into a shop to purchase the articles sold there-if the female who serves, has charms, and the customer fancies her charms as well as the other articles of the shop---and if, moreover, this female willingly consents to his partaking of some of those charms, and carries them to the residence of the customer, that he may the more conveniently enjoy them; where, I ask, is the jury that will give damages worth suing for? What good can you expect to gain but public exposure? Recollect too, the ridiculous figure you will cut in court, when your journey round the roof of the house is described; your entry of the bed-chamber with a horsewhip; your sudden and terrified retreat after beholding your wife in the arms of another; your confinement in the watch-house all night as a thief, while the adulterer remained triumphant, rioting till morning in the heaven of your wife's embraces. Would it not be better for you, as a man of business, that this matter should be hushed up; that the shopman should be bribed to silence; and instead of incurring the enormous expence attendant on legal proceedings, with no other effect than publishing to the whole world your own dishonour-that you should pocket à douceur of £500, as some recompence for the treatment you have received. "A word also with regard to your wife-She is, I can assure you, wretched; his lordship has offered to provide for her, and to support her in the first style of elegance, but she will listen to nothing. She says the fault was in her passions, not in her affections, which have never been alienated from you; she says she still adores you, notwithstanding she has so grossly wronged you; she does not care what becomes of herself, but grieves alone for the anguish you must feel at her infidelity. But leaving this miserable, yet doating and affectionate creature to her own reflections, let us take the circumstance in another point of view :-You have never known your wife remiss in her domestic duties; she has born you three children, but has, at last, in consequence of the weakness of her nature, yielded to an accidental temptation-she has, for once, indulged in an extra gratification; a strong appetite has induced her to take one glass of comfort from home-Is this a demonstration that she loved you less? Do not many ladies, when from home, take a dram to warm them, or a draught of soda-water to cool them, without detracting from the love they bear their husbands? She says you love her; she feels confident of it; and I do not doubt it; but can you swear that you have never, when heated with wine, been seduced by the frailty of the flesh, against your better judgment? Have you never kissed the maid in the absence of the mistress? Your conscience tells you, you have. You allow that woman is the weaker vessel; ergo, her passions have a greater influence over her. If you are a Christian, you must be merciful, and make allowances. God pardons those who repent of their transgressions, even unto the seventieth time; and mercy is the sublimest attribute of the Deity. If the Father of all was to be as unforgiving to his children, as man is to his fellow creatures, what human being could hope to enter the kingdom of heaven? Our blessed Saviour said, when the woman was taken in adultery, 'Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.' Your wife sincerely repents; she loves you most affectionately; in fact, she adores you: if you are a man, and a Christian, |