ACT IV. SCENE I.-A Hall in PETRUCHIO's Country House. Enter GRUMIO. Gru. Fie, fie, on all tired jades, on all mad masters, and all foul ways! Was ever man so beaten? was ever man so rayed? was ever man so weary? I am sent before to make a fire, and they are coming after to warm them. Now, were not I a little pot, and soon hot, my very lips might freeze to my teeth, my tongue to the roof of my mouth, my heart in my belly, ere I should come by a fire to thaw me; but, I, with blowing the fire, shall warm myself, for, considering the weather, a taller man than I will take cold. Holla, hoa! Curtis ! Enter CURTIS. Curt. Who is that, calls so coldly? Gru. A piece of ice: if thou doubt it, thou may'st slide from my shoulder to my heel, with no greater a run but my head and my neck. A fire, good Curtis. Curt. Is my master and his wife coming, Grumio? cast on no water. Curt. Is she so hot a shrew as she's reported? Gru. She was, good Curtis, before this frost; but, thou know'st, winter tames man, woman, and beast, for it hath tamed my old master, and my new mistress, and thyself, fellow Curtis. Curt. Away, you three-inch fool! I am no beast. Gru. Am I but three inches? why, thy horn is a foot; and so long am I at the least. But wilt thou make a fire, or shall I complain on thee to our mistress, whose hand (she being now at hand) thou shalt soon feel, to thy cold comfort, for being slow in thy hot office? Curt. I pr'ythee, good Grumio, tell me, how goes the world? Gru. A cold world, Curtis, in every office but thine; and, therefore, fire. Do thy duty, and have thy duty, for my master and mistress are almost frozen to death. Curt. There's fire ready; and therefore, good Grumio, the news? Gru. Why, "Jack, boy! ho boy!" and as much news as thou wilt. Curt. Come, you are so full of cony catching. Gru. What's that to thee? Curt. Why, a horse. Gru. Tell thou the tale:-but had'st thou not crossed me, thou should'st have heard how her horse fell, and she under her horse; thou should'st have heard, in how miry a place; how she was bemoiled; how he left her with the horse upon her; how he beat me because her horse stumbled; how she waded through the dirt to pluck him off me; how he swore; how she prayed, that never prayed before; how I cried; how the horses ran away; how her bridle was burst; how I lost my crupper;-with many things of worthy memory, which now shall die in oblivion, and thou return unexperienced to thy grave. Gru. Why, therefore, fire: for I have caught extreme cold. Where's the cook? is supper ready, the house trimmed, rushes strewed, cobwebs swept; the servingmen in their new fustian, their white stockings, and every officer his wedding-garment on? Be the Jacks fair within, the Jills fair without, the carpets laid, and every thing in order? Curt. All ready; and therefore, I pray thee, news? mistress fallen out. Curt. How? Curt. By this reckoning he is more shrew than she. Gru. Ay; and that thou and the proudest of you all shall find, when he comes home. But what talk I of this?-Call forth Nathaniel, Joseph, Nicholas, Philip, Walter, Sugarsop, and the rest: let their heads be sleekly combed, their blue coats brushed, and their garters of an indifferent knit: let them curtsey with their left legs, and not presume to touch a hair of my master's horse-tail, till they kiss their hands. Are they all ready? Curt. They are. Gru. Call them forth. Curt. Do you hear? ho! you must meet my master, to countenance my mistress. Gru. Why, she hath a face of her own. Gru. Thou, it seems, that callest for company to countenance her. Curt. I call them forth to credit her. Gru. Welcome, you;-how now, you;-what, you; -fellow, you;-and thus much for greeting. Now, my spruce companions, is all ready, and all things neat? Nath. All things is ready. How near is our master? Gru. E'en at hand, alighted by this; and therefore be not,-Cock's passion, silence! I hear my master. [All servants frightened. Enter PETRUCHIO and KATHARINA. To hold my stirrup, nor to take my horse. Pet. Here, sir! here, sir! here, sir! here, sir? Gru. Out of their saddles into the dirt; and thereby You logger-headed and unpolish'd grooms! hangs a tale. What, no attendance? no regard? no duty?— Gru. Here, sir; as foolish as I was before. Did I not bid thee meet me in the park, Gru. Nathaniel's coat, sir, was not fully made, And Gabriel's pumps were all unpink'd i' the heel; There was no link to colour Peter's hat, And Walter's dagger was not come from sheathing: There were none fine, but Adam, Ralph, and Gregory; The rest were ragged, old, and beggarly; Yet, as they are, here are they come to meet you. Pet. Go, rascals, go, and fetch my supper in.— [Exeunt some of the Servants. "Where is the life that late I led "- [Sings. Where are those-? Sit down, Kate, and welcome. Soud, soud, soud, soud! Re-enter Servants, with supper. [Sings. Why, when, I say?—Nay, good sweet Kate, be merry. [Kicks him. Pet. 'Tis burnt; and so is all the meat. [Throws the meat, &c. all about. Pet. I tell thee, Kate, 'twas burnt and dried away, And I expressly am forbid to touch it, For it engenders choler, planteth anger: And better 'twere, that both of us did fast, Since, of ourselves, ourselves are choleric, Than feed it with such over-roasted flesh. Be patient; to-morrow 't shall be mended, And for this night we'll fast for company. Come, I will bring thee to thy bridal chamber. [Exeunt PETRUCHIO, KATHARINA, and CURTIS. Nath. Peter, didst ever see the like? Peter. He kills her in her own humour. Re-enter CURTIS. Gru. Where is he? Curt. In her chamber, Making a sermon of continency to her; And rails, and swears, and rates, that she, poor soul, Pet. Thus have I politicly begun my reign, My falcon now is sharp, and passing empty, For then she never looks upon her lure. And here I'll fling the pillow, there the bolster, That all is done in reverend care of her; [Exit. Tra. Is't possible, friend Licio, that mistress Bianca Doth fancy any other but Lucentio? I tell you, sir, she bears me fair in hand. Enter BIANCA and LUCENTIO. You that durst swear that your mistress Bianca Tra. O, despiteful love! unconstant womankind!— I tell thee, Licio, this is wonderful. Hor. Mistake no more: I am not Licio, Tra. Signior Hortensio, I have often heard And since mine eyes are witness of her lightness, Hor. See, how they kiss and court!-Signior Lucentio, Here is my hand, and here I firmly vow Tra. And here I take the like unfeigned oath, sworn her! For me, that I may surely keep mine oath, Shall win my love :-and so I take my leave, [Exit HORTENSIO.-LUCENTIO and BIANCA advance. Bian. Tranio, you jest. But have you both forsworn me? Tra. Mistress, we have. Bion. [Aside.] As much as an apple doth an oyster, and all one. Tra. To save your life in this extremity, His name and credit shall you undertake, Then we are rid of Licio. Till you have done your business in the city. Tra. I'faith, he'll have a lusty widow now, That shall be woo'd and wedded in a day. Bian, God give him joy! Tra. Ay, and he'll tame her. He says so, Tranio. Tra. Ay, mistress, and Petruchio is the master; Bion. O master, master! I have watch'd so long Tra. What is he, Biondello? Tra. If he be credulous, and trust my tale, Ped. O! sir, I do; and will repute you ever Tra. Then go with me, to make the matter good. Go with me, to clothe you as becomes you. [Exeunt. Gru. No, no, forsooth; I dare not, for my life. Am starv'd for meat, giddy for lack of sleep; As who should say, if I should sleep, or eat, [Exeunt LUCENTIO and BIANCA. "Twere deadly sickness, or else present death. Enter a Pedant. Ped. God save you, sir! And you, sir: you are welcome. Of Mantua. Tra. Of Mantua, sir?-marry, God forbid! Ped. My life, sir! how, I pray? for that goes hard. Ped. Alas, sir! it is worse for me than so; Tra. Among them, know you one Vincentio? A merchant of incomparable wealth. Tra. He is my father, sir; and, sooth to say, In countenance somewhat doth resemble you. I pr'ythee go, and get me some repast; I care not what, so it be wholesome food. Kath. "Tis passing good: I pr'ythee let me have it. How say you to a fat tripe, finely broil'd? Or else you get no beef of Grumio. Kath. Then both, or one, or any thing thou wilt. That feed'st me with the very name of meat. Go; get thee gone, I say. Enter PETRUCHIO with a dish of meat, and HORTENSIO. Kath. 'Faith, as cold as can be. What! not a word? Nay then, thou lov'st it not, Here, take away this dish. I pray you, let it stand. Hor. Signior Petruchio, fie! you are to blame. Come, mistress Kate, I'll bear you company. Pet. [Aside.] Eat it up all, Hortensio, if thou lov'st me. [To her.] Much good do it unto thy gentle heart! With silken coats, and caps, and golden rings, Come, tailor, let us see these ornaments; Enter Haberdasher. Lay forth the gown.-What news with you, sir? A knack, a toy, a trick, a baby's cap; Kath. I'll have no bigger: this doth fit the time, And gentlewomen wear such caps as these. Pet. When you are gentle, you shall have one too; And not till then. Hor. [Aside.] That will not be in haste. I love thee well, in that thou lik'st it not. Pet. Thy gown? why, ay:-come, tailor, let us see't. Why, what, o'devil's name, tailor, call'st thou this? Hor. [Aside.] I see, she's like to have neither cap nor gown. Tai. You bid me make it orderly and well, According to the fashion, and the time. Pet. Marry, and did; but if you be remember'd, I did not bid you mar it to the time. Go, hop me over every kennel home, I'll none of it: hence! make your best of it. Pet. Why, true; he means to make a puppet of thee. Tai. She says, your worship means to make a puppet of her. Pet. O, monstrous arrogance! Thou liest, thou thread, Thou thimble, Thou yard, three-quarters, half-yard, quarter, nail! Gru. I gave him no order; I gave him the stuff. Gru. Face not me: thou hast braved many men ; brave not me: I will neither be faced nor braved. I say unto thee,-I bid thy master cut out the gown; but I did not bid him cut it to pieces: ergo, thou liest. Tai. Why, here is the note of the fashion to testify. Pet. Read it. Gru. The note lies in's throat, if he say I said so. Tai. "Imprimis, a loose-bodied gown.' Gru. Master, if ever I said loose-bodied gown, sew me in the skirts of it, and beat me to death with a bottom of brown thread: I said, a gown. Pet. Proceed. Tai. "With a small compassed cape." Tai. "With a trunk sleeve." Gru. Error i'the bill, sir; error i'the bill. I commanded the sleeves should be cut out, and sewed up again; and that I'll prove upon thee, though thy little finger be armed in a thimble. Tai. This is true, that I say: an I had thee in place where, thou should'st know it. Gru. I am for thee straight: take thou the bill, give me thy mete-yard, and spare not me. Hor. God-a-mercy, Grumio; then he shall have no odds. Pet. Well, sir, in brief, the gown is not for me. Gru. You are i'the right, sir: 'tis for my mistress. Pet. Go, take it up unto thy master's use. Gru. Villain, not for thy life! Take up my mistress' gown for thy master's use? Pet. Why, sir, what's your conceit in that? Gru. O, sir, the conceit is deeper than you think for. Take up my mistress' gown to his master's use? O, fie, fie, fie! Pet. [Aside.] Hortensio, say thou wilt see the tailor paid. Go take it hence; be gone, and say no more. [Exeunt Tailor and Haberdasher. Pet. Well, come, my Kate; we will unto your father's, Even in these honest mean habiliments. And as the sun breaks through the darkest clouds, Or is the adder better than the eel, Kath. I dare assure you, sir, 'tis almost two, Hor. Why, so this gallant will command the sun. Tra. Sir, this is the house: please it you, that I call? Near twenty years ago, in Genoa, Tra. "Tis well; and hold your own, in any case, Ped. I warrant you. But, sir, here comes your boy; "Twere good, he were school'd. Tra. Fear you not him. Sirrah, Biondello, Now do your duty throughly, I advise you: Imagine 'twere the right Vincentio. Bion. Tut! fear not me. Tra. But hast thou done thy errand to Baptista? Bion. I told him, that your father was at Venice, And that you look'd for him this day in Padua. Tra. Thou'rt a tall fellow: hold thee that to drink. Signior Baptista, you are happily met.--- Sir, by your leave: having come to Padua To have him match'd; and, if you please to like Me shall you find ready and willing Bap. Sir, pardon me in what I have to say: Right true it is, your son Lucentio, here, We be affied, and such assurance ta'en, As shall with either part's agreement stand? Bap. Not in my house, Lucentio; for, you know, Tra. Then, at my lodging, an it like you: Bap. It likes me well:--Cambio, hie you home, [Exeunt TRANIO, Pedant, and BAPTISTA. Bion. Cambio! Luc. What say'st thou, Biondello? Bion. 'Faith nothing; but he has left me here behind, to expound the meaning or moral of his signs and tokens. Luc. I pray thee, moralize them. Bion. Then thus. Baptista is safe, talking with the deceiving father of a deceitful son. Luc. And what of him? Bion. His daughter is to be brought by you to the supper. Luc. And then? Bion. The old priest at St. Luke's church is at your command at all hours. Luc. And what of all this? Bion. I cannot tell; except, while they are busied about a counterfeit assurance, take you assurance of her, cum privilegio ad imprimendum solùm. To the church!-take the priest, clerk, and some sufficient honest witnesses. If this be not that you look for, I have no more to say, Luc. Hear'st thou, Biondello? Bion. I cannot tarry: I knew a wench married in Luc. I may, and will, if she be so contented: It shall go hard, if Cambio go without her. [Exit. |