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'I know,' quoth he, ‘no house, no wife, no mis
So that my errand, due unto my tongue,
home. Dro. E. Go back again, and be new beaten home? For God's sake, send some other messenger.
Adr. Back, slave, or I will break thy pate across. Dro. E. And he will bless that cross with other
beating : Between you I shall have a holy head. Adr. Hence, prating peasant; fetch thy master
home. Dro. E. Am I so round with you, as you with me, That like a football you do spurn me thus ? You spurn me hence, and he will spurn me hither : If I last in this service, you must case me in leather.
[Exit. Luc. Fie, how impatience lowereth in your face !
Adr. His company must do his minions grace,
By him not ruin'd ? then is he the ground
Luc. Self-harming jealousy !-fie, beat it hence.
Enter ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Ant. S. The gold, I gave to Dromio, is laid up Safe at the Centaur ; and the heedful slave
i Alteration of features. 3 Stalking-horse.
2 Fair, for fairness. 4 Hinders.
Is wander'd forth, in care to seek me out.
Enter DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. How now, sir ? is your merry humor alter'd ? As you love strokes, so jest with me again. You know no Centaur ? you received no gold ? Your mistress sent to have me home to dinner ? My house was at the Phoenix ? Wast thou mad, That thus so madly thou didst answer me? Dro. S. What answer, sir ? when spake I such a
word ? Ant. S. Even now, even here, not half an hour
since. Dro. S. I did not see you since you sent me
hence, Home to the Centaur, with the gold you gave me.
Ant. S. Villain, thou didst deny the gold's receipt ; And told'st me of a mistress, and a dinner; For which, I hope, thou felt’st I was displeased.
Dro. S. I am glad to see you in this merry vein. What means this jest ? I pray you, master, tell me. Ant. S. Yea, dost thou jeer, and flout me in the
teeth ? Think’st thou, I jest ? Hold, take thou that, and that.
[beating him. Dro. S. Hold, sir, for God's sake : now your jest
is earnest : Upon what bargain do you give it me?
Ant. S. Because that I familiarly sometimes
Dro. S. Sconce, call you it? so you would leave battering, I had rather have it a head : an you use these blows long, I must get a sconce for my head, and ensconce it too ; 3 or else I shall seek my wit in my shoulders. But, I pray, sir, why am I beaten ?
Ant. S. Dost thou not know ? .
Dro. S. Ay, sir, and wherefore ; for, they say, every why hath a wherefore.
Ant. S. Why, first,-for flouting me; and then, wherefore,—for urging it the second time to me. Dro. S. Was there ever any man thus beaten out
of season? When, in the why and the wherefore is neither
rhyme nor reason ?Well, sir, I thank you.
1 Intrude on them when you please. 2 Study my countenance. 3 A sconce was a petty fortification.
Ant. S. Thank me, sir ? for what ?
Dro. S. Marry, sir, for this something that you gave me for nothing.
Ant. S. I'll make you amends next, to give you nothing for something. But say, sir, is it dinnertime? Dro. S. No, sir ; I think, the meat wants that I
Dro. S. Lest it make you choleric, and purchase me another dry basting.
Ant. S. Well, sir, learn to jest in good time. There's a time for all things.
Dro. S. I durst have denied that, before you were so choleric.
Ant. S. By what rule, sir ?
Dro. S. Marry, sir, by a rule as plain as the plain bald pate of father Time himself.
Ant. S. Let's hear it.
Dro. S. There's no time for a man to recover his hair, that grows bald by nature.
Ant. S. May he not do it by fine and recovery?
Dro. S. Yes, to pay a fine for a periwig, and recover the lost hair of another man.
Ant. S. Why is Time such a niggard of hair, being, as it is, so plentiful an excrement ?