Writing memorable maths jokes is like solving a maths problem. As you begin to write, the jokes multiply. Then you have to divide them into the funny and downright hilarious—before subtracting the lame ones. And of course there’s the addition of an eyecatching heading. In fact, they say writing Math jokes is the first sine of madness. But, we’ve taken the risk to bring you 30 memorable Math jokes that will, in a fraction of time, make all your problems vanish.
30 math jokes that are absolute value

What did the mathematician say when his daughter complained she was cold? Go and stand in the corner, it’s always 90 degrees there.

Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems.

What do mathematicians eat for lunch? Pi and chips

What do husbands and obtuse angles have in common? They’re never right.

I nicknamed my husband infinity. He just goes on and on and on.

What did the newlywed wife say to her Maths professor husband? It’s time we multiplied.

I was worried when I saw our Maths teacher with graph paper. I knew she was plotting something.

I hate negative numbers. I’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.

A farmer had 196 cows in his paddock but when he rounded them up he had 200.

I was never good at maths. My mind always kept going off on a tangent.

How do you make seven an even number? Just remove the s.

Did you hear about the Math faculty that named their bar, ‘graphs’?

My friend asked me if she was good looking. I said she was average. It was a mean thing to say.

I knicknamed my exwife Decimal. She always had a point.

When you list all the monsters we’ve created do you Count Dracula?

When I try to add things up I end up with figures all over the place. I guess they’re roamin’ numerals.

Did you hear about the mathematician who had a son? He welcomed the new addition to the family.

If you want to chat up a maths teacher, use acute angle.

My girlfriend is the square root of 100. She’s a perfect 10, but purely imaginary.

I only remember a fraction of what I learnt in maths.

Bill has 31 chocolate bars. He eats 27. What does he have now? Diabetes.

I left our odd job man a list of 8 tasks. But when I returned he’d only done 1,3,5 and 7.

Dear Algebra, please stop asking us to find your X. She’s never coming back and don’t ask Y.

Half of 8 is 4, right. Wrong. Vertically it’s 3 and horizontally it’s 0.

5 out of 4 people have trouble with fractions.

I failed my Maths exam. It was a sine of things to come.

Old mathematicians eventually realise their numbers up.

Maths teachers can’t be all that smart. They have to put the answers at the back of the book.

Why is the equal sign so humble? Because he knew he wasn’t > or < than anyone else.

Why do teenagers travel in odd numbers? Because they can’t even…
So we guess we have a common denominator. We love to laugh at Math jokes. And if Math is what keeps you rational, these math gifts, games and guides are the answer to all your problems.